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Original poster

Should I confront my boyfriend?

24 replies

Kenyaparks · 09/04/2025 04:40

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 6 months now. He still follows his ex fling on social media and views all her social stories? He claims that there’s nothing there on his part and he’s moved on. I mentioned him unfollowing her, and he never took it serious. He did take her virginity while they were dating for only a couple of months last year. I’m wondering if I’m over thinking or if I should bring this up again. He never misses a story she posts… don’t ask me how I know.

The males in my family tell me that I’m ogling to run him off with this but I think it’s a respect thing? I need some advice?

OP posts:
MaggieBsBoat · 09/04/2025 04:44

If it bothers you (and I can’t say whether it should as I don’t know the extent of it) he should be prioritising your feelings and deleting her is it upsets you. You deserve to come first. It shouldn’t be a hardship for him to do so for you and if it is then right there is a problem. YANBU.

LBFseBrom · 09/04/2025 04:49

Are you serious with this guy after six months? I know things can feel serious after less time than that but in reality, the relationship is in early days.

I think if boyfriend was committed to you, he wouldn't be seriously following an ex. However people do look up exes and old friends just out of curiosity. It doesn't always mean much.

When you say he 'took' her virginity, I am hoping it was a mutual thing for them and that he didn't 'take' it without asking!

She is not very ex if their relationship was last year and that makes yours sound very new!

FortyElephants · 09/04/2025 04:57

Are you going through his phone daily??

This is not a good relationship. Not because he watches her stories (though if he only watches hers regularly then he probably does still have some interest in her) but because you're checking his phone and stressing about his social media use. Time to move on.

Original poster
Kenyaparks · 09/04/2025 04:58

LBFseBrom · 09/04/2025 04:49

Are you serious with this guy after six months? I know things can feel serious after less time than that but in reality, the relationship is in early days.

I think if boyfriend was committed to you, he wouldn't be seriously following an ex. However people do look up exes and old friends just out of curiosity. It doesn't always mean much.

When you say he 'took' her virginity, I am hoping it was a mutual thing for them and that he didn't 'take' it without asking!

She is not very ex if their relationship was last year and that makes yours sound very new!

No the sex was mutual they dated the end of 2023 and beginning of 2024. The last time they hooked up was July 2024 and the last time they talked was August 2024.

I have feelings for this man. Yet why does he have to watch every single one of her social media stories if he’s over her ? She even reached out and sent a message to him, although he didn’t reply, he didn’t remove her either???

OP posts:
LBFseBrom · 09/04/2025 05:00

As I thought, a recent ex.

I think he is still interested in her, op. She may not be all that interested in him but the fact is, he is less into you.

Keep your options open, this may well not last.

Mumdiva99 · 09/04/2025 05:01

FortyElephants · 09/04/2025 04:57

Are you going through his phone daily??

This is not a good relationship. Not because he watches her stories (though if he only watches hers regularly then he probably does still have some interest in her) but because you're checking his phone and stressing about his social media use. Time to move on.

This 100 percent.
You behaviour is not normal or ok. If you don't trust him and check his phone you need to move on.

Original poster
Kenyaparks · 09/04/2025 05:02

LBFseBrom · 09/04/2025 05:00

As I thought, a recent ex.

I think he is still interested in her, op. She may not be all that interested in him but the fact is, he is less into you.

Keep your options open, this may well not last.

How they only dated for three months…. She recently messaged him and he didn’t even reply.

OP posts:
Swiftie1878 · 09/04/2025 05:17

He’s poring over her socials and it bothers you.
Move on. And stop going in your partner’s phone. It’s the first step to the end of a relationship. Date someone you are prepared to trust.

Original poster
Kenyaparks · 09/04/2025 05:25

Swiftie1878 · 09/04/2025 05:17

He’s poring over her socials and it bothers you.
Move on. And stop going in your partner’s phone. It’s the first step to the end of a relationship. Date someone you are prepared to trust.

What do you mean by poring ?

OP posts:
Swiftie1878 · 09/04/2025 05:45

Kenyaparks · 09/04/2025 05:25

What do you mean by poring ?

Show quote history

You said he views ALL her stories. That’s more than a casual interest.

Shoxfordian · 09/04/2025 05:57

How do you know all this? Stop being insecure, if he wanted her then he would try to be with her but he's with you

Agix · 09/04/2025 06:50

Watching all her stories means nothing.

My ex watched all my stories for bloody months, but I never heard from him again. Then one day he randomly just stopped. That was weirder though as he wasn't even following me... So he was coming to my page just to check up on me. Still never heard from him ever and nothing came from it.

Sometimes people end up watching all the stories when they're following someone, because they're just going through the stories list at the top and scrolling through a bunch at once.

He's not replying to her or messaging her, he's not bothered about her.

StartAnew · 09/04/2025 06:53

Kenyaparks · 09/04/2025 05:02

How they only dated for three months…. She recently messaged him and he didn’t even reply.

Show quote history

He probably still fancies her and hopes to get back with her. Personally I wouldn’t put up with him following his ex and not caring that it upsets you. I’d dump him.

PricklyLikeCactus · 09/04/2025 06:56

‘Took her virginity’ - what an awful phrase that is.

BMW6 · 09/04/2025 07:34

TBH you sound rather immature and not in the right headspace to be in a relationship.

Break it off and take some time out from dating.

Lostworlds · 09/04/2025 07:42

How do you know he’s watching her stories? I have exes online and when their story comes up I’ll either glance at it or just swipe past.
They haven’t actually spoken in months, he didn’t reply to her, but there’s something here that bothers you about all of this. Has he volunteered any of this Information to you or are you checking his phone?

You’re feeling insecure, has he given you any reason to feel like this?

KrisAkabusi · 09/04/2025 07:51

The males in my family tell me that I’m ogling to run him off with this but I think it’s a respect thing?

Well, you're disrespecting him by secretly going through his phone. Suppose he did what you asked. How long would you continue checking up on him to see if he starts following her again? Break up, there's clearly no point to this relationship if you don't trust him.

Naunet · 09/04/2025 08:24

If you think he's still into her, dump him, but what you can't do is drive yourself crazy checking his phone in the hope it'll help anything other than him getting seriously pissed off with you when he finds out. You can't control another person, only yourself, so if you're not happy, walk away, or if you are happy, stop checking up on him and give him some trust.

Original poster
Kenyaparks · 09/04/2025 19:22

Lostworlds · 09/04/2025 07:42

How do you know he’s watching her stories? I have exes online and when their story comes up I’ll either glance at it or just swipe past.
They haven’t actually spoken in months, he didn’t reply to her, but there’s something here that bothers you about all of this. Has he volunteered any of this Information to you or are you checking his phone?

You’re feeling insecure, has he given you any reason to feel like this?

Edited

My point exactly he didn’t even reply to her texts …. So I’m not sure why some people on here are saying he still wants her.

OP posts:
Maitri108 · 09/04/2025 19:28

You need to finish the relationship as you're deeply insecure and spying on him.

Swiftie1878 · 10/04/2025 04:49

Kenyaparks · 09/04/2025 19:22

My point exactly he didn’t even reply to her texts …. So I’m not sure why some people on here are saying he still wants her.

Show quote history

Oh fgs. You started this thread.
If you don’t believe he still wants her, what’s the problem? Why are you checking his phone and why would you want to confront him?

TidyDancer · 10/04/2025 04:59

This is all a bit odd. You must be going through his phone regularly to know what stories he is viewing and then when someone suggests there’s something still there feelings-wise you’re immediately jumping to his defence. I’m not sure what you’re looking for here.

ExtraOnions · 10/04/2025 07:06

If you are going through his phone, it’s a big red flag for him .. you are controlling, insecure and jealous. I think you need to grow up a bit before getting into a relationship

Original poster
Kenyaparks · 13/04/2025 18:41

Swiftie1878 · 09/04/2025 05:45

You said he views ALL her stories. That’s more than a casual interest.

Show quote history

Yeah but maybe he just does it cause he’s bored? Plus she’s not a ex she’s a ex fling their situation only lasted for 3 months

OP posts:
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