To ask if there's any hope of my cat returning?

[BePoliteOpalQuail]

I've been fostering an ex-feral/stray cat from a charity for 10 days. He is neutered and chipped, he is incredibly nervous and timid and in the 10 days I had him he hid the entire time. He would only eat when I wasn't around, and sometimes used the litter tray but occasionally used various locations in my flat.

I have another cat who's female and older, this male is very young. She wasn't at all bothered by him, had a bit of a sniff then got on with her usual business.

Anyway this foster cat was born outside and is not socialised, it's unclear how long he'd been in the shelter but he is not used to living with people.

Unfortunately in the early hours he escaped. He is quite small but is still adult size, he managed to squeeze through the gap in my window which is no bigger than 2 inches.

The window is on a security lock, I know cats can be contortionists but I'm still bewildered as to how he got his head through a gap that size. I never left the window wide open, however I'd left it very slightly open on the security latch and then fallen asleep.

He urinated on my couch and throw and then must've made his escape. I am furious with myself for being so irresponsible. I honestly thought it would be very difficult for him to get out of that tiny gap, my other cat is larger but has absolutely zero chance.

I know I've been a complete idiot and I'm already beating myself up. Have left food outside the window which has been eaten, but that may have been another cat. Been out looking everywhere, but nothing. I haven't stopped crying, I know that sounds dramatic but it's my actions that have led to this.

I've posted on local groups, any further advice? My partner is telling me to stop beating myself up, but it's hard. It's only been 10 days so he may not recognise this as home.

I've left his toy, litter tray and blanket outside of my window. My other cat goes out but always comes back and knows where home is. I feel like I've let this foster cat down.

Also the fact that he's not domesticated doesn't help either. I doubt he wants to be a house cat, he's used to living outside. I'm just glad it's not freezing cold but I'm really worried about him. Anything more I could do?

If he wants to be an outdoor cat that's ok. I just want him to have food and shelter, i don't want him to be unsafe.

My other cat is quite big, she likes having the window open to sit and look outside. However since he arrived I can only let her sit on it supervised.
She was meowing to have it opened last night, so i opened it that tiny amount that I (wrongly) thought cats couldn't get out of, I even joked to my partner that she was trying and failing to get her head out of that thin opening.

I haven't read the whole thread, so apologies if this has been suggested. Could you borrow a trap from the charity? If the food outside is being taken, it could be worth a shot.

Though that's a very small gap for a cat to fit through. I hope he turns up for you, inside or outside

Trigger warning - this may upset some.

Many many years ago some of my cats were poisoned, I took the surviving cats to my parents house - on a train for 6 hours !

One evening one got out of a window ( yes it had been left open ) this cat had been born to a stray / feral colony so wasn't very friendly and didn't know my parents well enough to come to their calling so they were all being kept in.

A month or so passed and one evening my father happened to look out the window and saw said cat :) he had put food out in the bushes every night and it was being eaten - this gave my father hope altho it could have been foxes or other cats - tho there were very few cats in the street we owned most of them :)

I went up at the weekend and called and called, and yes there is a happy ending, cat recognised my voice and me as being his feeder for a couple of years.
Cat allowed me to pick him up and my father was delighted !
All the cats returned home with me that weekend.

So yes put out food, prob in the evening when it's quiet and dark, then you can consider setting a cat trap. I am sure advice can be given on this by us or the rescue you got him from.

No that's not how it works. Many cats, even very tame ones, are desperate to escape when they find themselves in a new place. That's why we drum into adopters and fosterers the importance of never leaving a window open, not even with a small gap.

After days, weeks or even months the cats will adjust, can be tamed, and will then happily live as normal house cats - coming and going. You just need to persevere during the first few weeks.

That doesn't prove anything, a scared cat will happily go hours or even days without eating.

I think you're catastrophising (pun not intended!) - it's not even been 24 hours yet. I would leave food out, stop searching and just wait.

Act as if he is still inside. Just in case he is and makes a bolt for it through the door.

put down a certain number of treats in each room you can shut off from your current cat and count them to see if he is coming out to take them.

Has anyone locally got access to a motion activated wildlife camera? That way you could see if it is him eating the food outside and if so find someone who can provide a humane trap.

My other cat was out for 30 hours the very first time she was let out, it was terrifying. However I could see her around, she just didn't want to come in.
I just don't feel good about this one..it's put me off ever getting another cat to be honest.

My brother moved from one end of the country to the other with his cat. The cat got out through a gap in the window like yours. We didn’t believe my brother had it on the latch and not open but it was true

the power of social media found the cat about 2 miles away. It was scraped and scuffed from getting out the window but was ok. Keep the faith, hopefully you've got some pics of him you can put on social media

I'm a cat sitter and I've been in the position of not being able to find cats on numerous occasions despite logically knowing that they couldn't have escaped. I've turned houses upside down and looked in every conceivable place and they've eventually appeared from goodness knows where.

If the window gap is really 1.8in it's highly unlikely that he'll have got out, the smallest kittens hard skull is bigger than that.

It may be that you looking for him has unnerved him a bit and made him more likely to stay undercover for longer than usual, especially if you unwittingly got closer to him than you realised.

If you can, sit still and quiet and trick him into thinking you're not in, that's my trick for wary cats and it usually does work. They can go long spells without food and using a litter tray, especially if they're wary, so don't expect quick results 😄

Also don't blame yourself, on the off chance that he has got out which I doubt, his desire to be out and about must've been very strong.

The thing is when you have x2 cats pooing and weeing in various parts of the house, it's very difficult to never open your window, ever.
It sounds silly but I specifically opened it that much knowing (or assuming that a cat's head couldn't get through that gap at all)

What kind of charity tries to rehome a feral to be an indoor cat? I wouldn’t worry about any comeback from them for a start, but I agree with the vast majority the cat surely hasn’t gone out of that tiny space

I just don't understand..I live in a 30 square metre ground floor 1 bed flat. I've checked everywhere.
I've emailed them and explained, no reply so far.
They said he's not socialised but not feral, I don't know what the difference is tbh.

Even a ferral one who's only ever lived outside (except being forcibly taken to the shelter)?

And I didn't say the cat won't come back. Just that she shouldn't feel like she's failed in any way if he doesn't.

Apparently it was being fed by neighbours and i assume it was then captured and brought to the charity.

He wasn't aggressive or anything, he allowed me to stroke him but just very timid.

Thank you, I apprereciate it as I'm still beating myself up a lot.

Yes, even ferals. Ferals need to have a cat flap though, eventually, as they need to know they can always escape if necessary. Then they are usually happy to just come and go and will spend most of the winter inside. Some may even become tame. But, to get to that point, they need to be kept in for a couple of months generally.

My cat used to go on adventures but always returned after a few days

The charity knew i didn't have a cat flap when they visited, they said i could eventually let her out though.

From what you've said this cat isn't feral, just very timid, and in a couple of months would have relaxed and probably become friendly.

There is a big difference between a feral and a cat that's just very shy and scared.

The cat was born outside, has never lived with humans before the shelter, was living with a colony of cats outside and was captured and taken to the shelter. That's all I know.

Well that does sound like a feral. But if you had been able to touch him then he doesn't sound like a proper feral. Perhaps the previous feeders interacted with him a lot.

you haven't been clear whether this is your cat or not, as your opening line is ' I have been fostering '

Normally fosterers have the cats until they are adopted, but the cats still belong to the rescue.

so

have you adopted this cat
or are you fostering him

if you are fostering him the rescue will be round asap with a trap. and surely you would have phone contact and not just email ?

Our rescue cat was up the chimney.

He will let me stroke him but freezes when I do so. I'm fostering him, have emailed but lines not open until tomorrow, so will phone tomorrow.

That is feral.