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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you pay this school fine or risk it at court

311 replies

Coastingtohell25 · 05/04/2025 22:29

I know there is a lot of opinions on talking the kids out of school for holidays but I will not drip feed and I feel like I shouldn’t have to pay the fine.

We were informed that this year the school were not allowed to make allowances and everyone’s holiday request would be declined and it’s not their fault ( okay so I get this )

however the situation is as followed

DC class are away on residential mon -Friday to a sort of PGL like place. DC can’t attend for medical reasons and to be honest there was no real attempt to make it possible for them to attend.
parents were informed that if not attended they would be expected to be at school but DC is the only one not going. So we have booked a similar type holiday as a family at a well known family holiday park that dc enjoys which was very cheap due to not being in the holidays.

this will lead to a fine and I begrudge paying it to to be honest. Would I be unreasonable to stand my ground on this one ?

OP posts:
ThenAssess · 05/04/2025 22:50

Coastingtohell25 · 05/04/2025 22:36

Would need a nurse.

Show quote history

Schools do pay for a nurse to attend residential where it is absolutely necessary. They need to do this to make adaptations to meet the Equality Act.

Other schools invite the parent to stay or make some compromises around attending day time only, with the parent or nurse some nights.

Original poster
Coastingtohell25 · 05/04/2025 22:50

Missgemini · 05/04/2025 22:48

Sounds like you’ve gone somewhere like Centre Parcs based on your description. The fine will be much less than what it would have cost to go next week. Just pay the fine and move on with your life. You are very unlikely to win in court.

It was cheap and covered by their activity budget from short breaks personal budget :)
usually isn’t possible to cover it but it’s not school holiday so a win win.

OP posts:
TropicofCapricorn · 05/04/2025 22:50

LikeSeriously · 05/04/2025 22:44

It’s a hill I would be absolutely be prepared to die on. Stand your ground and go to court if required. I am so thankful they don’t have this ridiculous system in Northern Ireland. Educational outcomes with our system are good for GCSE - Students in Northern Ireland achieved the highest proportion of top grades in the UK, with 37% of entries given an A or A*.

The NI GCSE system is different to the rest of the UK. So comparing attainment is not as simple as "we got more As so we are better".

Original poster
Coastingtohell25 · 05/04/2025 22:52

ThenAssess · 05/04/2025 22:50

Schools do pay for a nurse to attend residential where it is absolutely necessary. They need to do this to make adaptations to meet the Equality Act.

Other schools invite the parent to stay or make some compromises around attending day time only, with the parent or nurse some nights.

Show quote history

Yes so when we first had the meeting around the school trip and raised the issue ( which they already knew would be an issue ) they asked me if it was possible if it was closer this year that I could bring them for the days and take them home at night even if it was for a few of the days.
then when they announced the trip it was 4 hours away 🙈

OP posts:
KickHimInTheCrotch · 05/04/2025 22:52

I don't think you're unreasonable for not sending your kid to school but I would have been pushing for them to attend the trip not arguing about the fine.

StrawberrySquash · 05/04/2025 22:52

TropicofCapricorn · 05/04/2025 22:35

Because he was able to attend. Whether his mates were having fun or not.

You chose to take him out of school

So just pay the fine.

Show quote history

But if the entire rest of the class are on the trip then there will be no curriculum to follow. He'll essentially be babysat in another class. OP is giving him an experience much closer to what he would be doing if his health allowed.

Although I have a nasty feeling you may fail the letter of the law, OP.

Oddsocksanduglyshoes · 05/04/2025 22:53

TropicofCapricorn · 05/04/2025 22:36

What's the medical reason

Show quote history

not relevant not up to you to decide whether it stops the child from attending the trip

TropicofCapricorn · 05/04/2025 22:53

StrawberrySquash · 05/04/2025 22:52

But if the entire rest of the class are on the trip then there will be no curriculum to follow. He'll essentially be babysat in another class. OP is giving him an experience much closer to what he would be doing if his health allowed.

Although I have a nasty feeling you may fail the letter of the law, OP.

Show quote history

She still took him out of school for a holiday.

The courts won't care.

Oddsocksanduglyshoes · 05/04/2025 22:54

Totally unreasonable for you to have to pay the fine

ThenAssess · 05/04/2025 22:54

Chaseandstatus · 05/04/2025 22:48

I would ask the school to record it as Education Off Site, tell them that you have great news and have managed to find an alternative provider for the school residential experience so your child will now also get to do hikes/canoes/high ropes /whatever the residential was going to cover. I would not describe it as holiday.

I've linked and included the guidance regarding this above. Requires much more than ‘we have found something similar’ as the school are accountable if they are going to mark him as attending.

GeorgianaM · 05/04/2025 22:54

Dye his hair pink so that he gets suspended for a week and take him on holiday without having to pay the fine.

Kevintheelf80 · 05/04/2025 22:54

TropicofCapricorn · 05/04/2025 22:45

What reason would the court agree with the OP? The school was open and the child could have attended, but the mum decided to take him on a holiday instead.

Show quote history

The fact that he won't be receiving a quality education that week plus he is being discriminated against

Sadtosaythis · 05/04/2025 22:55

Could the 1-1 not do the days and you collect him at the end of each day? That is assuming it’s relatively local. This is quite common in schools. Then he gets to do the day activities and you do your usual night care for him? Nobody misses out?

Regarding the fine, it seems unfair if he cannot attend on medical grounds but I think you would lose an appeal as it’s an educational visit. Surely the fine is still way cheaper than the cost of going to your destination in school holidays?

Either way, I feel for you. The money generated from fines goes back into the system as far as I’m aware. I would imagine the admin of the system costs a bit. I hope whatever the outcome your DC enjoys his break.

TropicofCapricorn · 05/04/2025 22:55

Oddsocksanduglyshoes · 05/04/2025 22:53

not relevant not up to you to decide whether it stops the child from attending the trip

Show quote history

Never said it would..but it provides context.

Like "oh he has asthma" is different to "he's got one leg and is blind" which again is different to "he needs a. 24hr nurse".

Original poster
Coastingtohell25 · 05/04/2025 22:55

GeorgianaM · 05/04/2025 22:54

Dye his hair pink so that he gets suspended for a week and take him on holiday without having to pay the fine.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

OP posts:
mindutopia · 05/04/2025 22:55

I don’t know that you’d win, but I’d fight it on principle just to get it all stated for the record and I’d possibly flag it with media as well. I would consider it discrimination. I think it’s right (for him) that you are creating an alternative experience.

That said, I took both of mine out for a 4 day city break (one to Italy and one to Spain) when they were in primary school. Only 8 sessions unauthorised absence so no fine. Absolutely no regrets. It’s years later now and they both still talk about those trips regularly. My son said his trip to Spain is literally the best thing he’s ever done.

Doolallies · 05/04/2025 22:56

I agree with your morals but I would pay the fine for ease of life

TheFairyCaravan · 05/04/2025 22:58

YANBU. I wouldn’t want to pay the fine either.

The school have booked a trip that your child can’t go on, which is discrimination in itself. You’re doing something lovely for them, instead of making them feel left out and having to sit in a class with younger children, all week, while their mates are off having fun. It’s not like they’re missing their GCSEs is it?

May09Bump · 05/04/2025 22:59

Chaseandstatus · 05/04/2025 22:48

I would ask the school to record it as Education Off Site, tell them that you have great news and have managed to find an alternative provider for the school residential experience so your child will now also get to do hikes/canoes/high ropes /whatever the residential was going to cover. I would not describe it as holiday.

Do this - I use to do similar with sports days.

Middleagedstriker · 05/04/2025 22:59

TropicofCapricorn · 05/04/2025 22:38

The child was unauthorised absent for the bays if the trip. It's not up to them.

Show quote history

School has discretion. We were allowed to take out kids out for a holiday as we had had a family trauma and weren't fined.

Happygoducky1 · 05/04/2025 22:59

Christ, lots of posters here who didn't read the OP properly

Op, please fight this under reasonable adjustments from the equality act 2010. This is a reasonable adjustment you have made to ensure he has the same experience or as close to as his peers.

Original poster
Coastingtohell25 · 05/04/2025 23:00

To clear this up

its not along the lines of asthma, diabetes etc

it’s more along the lines of home dialysis ..night time venting etc

OP posts:
cabbageking · 05/04/2025 23:00

Is the trip close enough that your child can attend any of the daytime events.

The cost for an overnight NHS nurse is £400 for us with an additional charge if they have to do anything after they retire for the night. This cost is payable by the parents which we have argued against because it seems way over the top and restricts our residential trip now. We pass the charge on to parents and ensure we stick to eight students who all need a nurse just in case and add £50 to the cost.

Sevenandahalf · 05/04/2025 23:00

I'm a teacher
I think it's shit there's one child who can't attend a school trip.
I think it's lovely you've booked your child on a holiday that is similar.
It seems really shitty to have to pay a fine.

howchildrenreallylearn · 05/04/2025 23:01

Logic and common sense seems to have left the building. Of course this child should be able to go on a holiday that week! Regardless of what the ‘rules’ are this is discrimination and just plain unfair. How mean to sit a child in another class for a week with younger kids. Honestly I think our education system is losing the plot.
On principle OP I would not pay the fine.