To think we devalue trauma?

[Catatedog]

i appreciate that we all cope with events differently however, it concerns me that people overuse trauma. For example someone stated they had ‘mild PTSD’ because a meeting was moved. Annoyance frustration and anger alone do not PTSD make.

I bet you flip when someone says "omg, Sharon didn't XYZ it was SOOOOO embarrassing, I nearly died"

She didn't nearly die, it was a turn of phrase, don't stress so much about how people speak. It doesn't impact you, and in reality it doesn't impact people with real PTSD.

In reality, no one actually believed the person who claimed PTSD from a cancelled meeting, why does it concern you?

It’s ordinary conversational exaggeration, like someone who double checks they locked the door claiming to ‘be a little bit OCD’. Not a diagnostic category.

I'd say that was a joke, an exaggerated expression. They don't therefore genuinely feel they have PTSD.

Like if someone said ' I just died when that happened '.

I think most of us have said we're starving at some point 🤷‍♂️

They were joking OP.

Or I literally died 🤣

I also struggle with people using OCD flipantly. The real condition is much worse than just liking things tidy or checking if you have locked the door.

I understand you OP! The more these terms are used casually, the more their meaning is diluted, and the less weight they are given when actually used properly.

As an example... Say you work in a team where people bang on about having dreadful migraines all day, despite clearly still working, using computers, going on their phones, singing along to the radio, etc. Then say you get struck down with an actual migraine and need to call in sick. What's your manager's reaction going to be like?

I think it is ignored mostly and labelled as something else to excuse it away.

People can say what they like, but it's a hard pill to swallow if you live with these conditions. I have OCD, and it's a horrible illness. It is not what people think it is. I live with distressing and exceptionally intrusive thoughts. It's offensive in the same way 'everyone is a little bit autistic' is offensive. The one I can't stand is 'oh she's a bit bipolar' to describe someone with normal mood swings. Bipolar is a severe metal illness.

Mental illness is already stigmatised and people's understanding of most things other than anxiety/depression is quite poor, and the dilution of conditions through vocabulary doesn't help with this.

it concerns me because it feels to mask a lack of understanding of trauma.

i feel we put trigger warnings all over the place and dont appreciate this promotes avoidance of distressing behaviours and peoples trauma’s can varry so much.

we fostered a little girl who would freeze at some points when playing outside. Could not work it out for months until discovered it only happened if you could smell BBQs and the social worker confirmed they had experienced a significant events at BBQ

for most people a BBQ is happy but was clearly triggering for this little girl. Lots of nurturing care and support gradually helped expose them.

Agree on migraines, OCD bipolar etc. I think it is difficult for anyone who has experienced it or supported someone who has.

to use the starving analogy someone who has seen malnutrished kids probably does not find it overly palitable for someone eating crisps to say they are starving when waiting an extra 10 minutes for Dominos delivery.

I agree, too. When we say "OMG, I'm dying!" it's pretty clear we aren't dead or in need of resuscitation. I'm partial to a bit of exaggeration (OK, I ADORE exaggeration! Can't get enough of it! I exaggerate EVERYTHING!). It's great for dramatic or comedic effect. But misappropriation of medical terms is becoming far too prevalent, and rarely comical.

As the PP described with her migraine example, it does devalue real conditions and, actually, perpetuates stigmatisation against those who really have them.

Your colleague could've said something like "I'm traumatised, I tell ya! Traumatised!" for the effect they presumably wanted. It isn't funny to just name a real condition and expect a laugh unless all mentions of that condition are a joke to you - which is the problem.

If the silly eejit actually expected sympathy for their "mild PTSD" it's even worse.

@garlicsmilei think they did expect sympathy. They also belittle all wellbeing things as we should just pull ourselves together

Reflecting on this it bothers me so much because I experienced a trauma recently. I do not think its PTSD but have had to do a lot of work hear. I do not feel I can ask for support if this is the broader context.

I agree OP.

The examples the first PP's gave are a little different. Like when you're embarrassed someone might say "I could have died". Obviously thats a phrase but the whole PTSD / trauma / lack of ability to deal with things which appear worse now are definitely more apparent.

There is an argument for the fact that now people are a bit more comfortable to talk about trauma and it is widely discussed however, when I was in therapy something we spoke about a bit towards the end was that difficult events are a part of life (I'm not referring to abuse or historical abuse which 100% need the empathy and help), but break ups, death of a loved one, loss of a job, or whatever and humans need tools to deal with them.

In some ways people self diagnosing or using phrases such as they suffer with PTSD etc after a fairly normal life event can really take away from the people who genuinely need assistance / therapy / support.

What a twat. Next time they do this, express deep concern and offer a psych referral. Suggest that such a deep level of distress over a humdrum work setback may indicate burnout. Refer them to HR for their own wellbeing.
Exaggerate 😁

I love an exaggeration too! "I've told you a billion times not to exaggerate" 😂

The migraine one is a good example. I have a close friend who really suffers with them, completely debilitated, can't work, has been hospitalised, tried every treatment and trial treatment under the sun.

I had a guy at work a few months ago saying he was suffering with a migraine whilst he was smoking a cigarette and chatting away with us all - he may have had a headache but I just thought "you have no idea".

I'm not really sure what you mean. Are you saying that a colleague joked about having PTSD so you can't seek help? Do you think the trauma you experienced has made you overly sensitive?

I agree OP. Overusing PTSD, OCD, anxiety etc devalues the experience those with diagnosis have with these conditions. People have normal nervousness and they have anxiety: they like a tidy house - it’s OCD. PTSD has become a joke that even minor inconveniences can trigger.

In reality all of these conditions have a huge impact on the lives of those who genuinely suffer. I wouldn’t wish the level of trauma needed to cause PTSD on anyone.

Mental illness is already stigmatised and people's understanding of most things other than anxiety/depression is quite poor, and the dilution of conditions through vocabulary doesn't help with this.

It has to be stigmatised as that is what the whole field is built upon and survives on - people being called abnormal.

I really bloody hate this! I have clinically diagnosed cPTSD. So many are saying ptsd when they mean they are upset by something, normal life events, not actual life changing trauma.

Same goes for OCD, migraines etc.

Even now when I have to declare it for medical reasons, I cringe because it’s been made to sound like everyone has it. I feel like I have to over explain my condition.

My uncle took his own life due to PTSD. He was in a horrible place mentally. So while recognising that events affect people differently, I am very sceptical when people blow up minor inconveniences into supposed traumas. Being late for work or the shop running out of your favourite cereal doesn't really compare to seeing your comrades gunned down in front of you.

@maitri108 the trauma I experienced has def made me more sensitive. That is kind of what trauma does.

I think people wont understand if I try to get help. People must be that sick of being told they an event was traumatic that they wont listen.

it was a medical trauma where I could have died. I have huge guilt about not pushing harder when I knewe there was something wrong. Particular neccessary medical procedures were hard as I just froze and went limp and couldnt tell then it was hurting. Then being in ITU after surgery and not knowing what was happening.

@Catatedog People will understand if you try and get help and it sounds like you're being triggered.

You went through serious trauma, try not to downplay it. It annoys me too when people cry wolf regarding mental health issues but don't let it deter you from seeking help.

It's not for anyone to judge how deeply we've been effected, it's entirely individual. It's hard to advocate for yourself when you're not well and some medical professionals can be dismissive, especially towards women.

You might find BACP useful to look for a therapist.