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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Psychiatrist said I binged - I disagree (tw)

74 replies

Plave · 02/04/2025 21:42

So I have a history of eating disorders. I used to eat very low calories for long extended periods of time. Followed by a binge. I haven’t really followed this pattern for a few years. But it’s always a fight to resist the urge to cut calories which enviably leads to a one off binge iykwim. I was underweight for years as the bingeing never counteracted the effects of the non eating.

Anyway, I was telling my psychiatrist that I ate very poorly and it gave me feelings of shame.

My psychiatrist referred to my eating as a binge. I am very unhappy with his assessment as it is nowhere near what I used to put away )plates and plates of pasta). I have come down with a cold so was not sticking to my usual diet which is very nutrient dense.

I ate:

Beans on toast
Plain crackers x3

Triple ready made sandwiches
Half a grab bag of Walker’s crisps

Cornetto
Packet of McCoy crisps
Cocktail sausage

I am unhappy as it is just a normal day of not great eating. So for the psychiatrist to have referred to it as a binge in his report is extremely disappointing as well as inaccurate!

Everyone has days where they end up relying on convenience food.

OP posts:
Starlightstarbright4 · 02/04/2025 21:49

Is this a days meal because if so I would say low on nutrients and calories

Original poster
Plave · 02/04/2025 21:53

Starlightstarbright4 · 02/04/2025 21:49

Is this a days meal because if so I would say low on nutrients and calories

Yes! I had a poor appetite but was fine grazing on snacks really. DH bought me snacks from the garage as I didn’t fancy cooking/eating an actual meal.

It’s absurd to refer to it as a binge! My psychiatrist knows full well what my old eating habits were.

OP posts:
Original poster
Plave · 02/04/2025 21:55

I eat very well most days - plenty of fresh fruit and veg, protein, healthy carbs etc. And I never spiral to the point where I compulsively overeat.

I was honest with the psychiatrist that I had anxiety around my eating. But the anxiety was more concerning the lack of nourishment and not making the effort to consume the right foods. Ie prioritising convenience over nutrition

OP posts:
Goinggonegone · 02/04/2025 21:55

I don't think it fits the definition of a binge anyway, if it was eaten throughout the day and not all at once

takealettermsjones · 02/04/2025 21:56

Has this psychiatrist been with you for your whole ED history or is he newer (to you)? I'm just wondering whether he's not fully aware what constitutes a binge for you. You've reported it to him as a "bad" eating day that caused shame for you - if that's the same way you would historically have described binges, maybe he's just describing it in terms of good day/bad day, if that makes sense?

Can you address it with him next time you see him, and say that while it wasn't a very healthy day you didn't feel that you had binged. I am no psychiatrist but I would have thought that was a good sign - that you can have an "unhealthy" day and not necessarily feel that you have given in to the urge to binge.

Sorry if I've used the wrong terms for anything!

Original poster
Plave · 02/04/2025 21:56

Goinggonegone · 02/04/2025 21:55

I don't think it fits the definition of a binge anyway, if it was eaten throughout the day and not all at once

I agree and I really wish to complain because I consider his assessment incredibly unprofessional and potentially harmful!

OP posts:
GCITC · 02/04/2025 21:57

I would think it's the time frame that would define it as a binge or not.

If you ate it over the course of a day, no. If you had it all in an hour, yes.

Judydoes2 · 02/04/2025 21:57

That is most definitely not a binge! What was the context of the conversation, if you're comfortable sharing? I am wondering if they thought you were implying it were a binge perhaps and were paraphrasing you?

I'm a therapist, masters in psychology albeit not a psychiatrist I work closely with them.

herbygarden · 02/04/2025 22:01

That is absolutely NOT a binge! I could eat all that easily by early afternoon!

summerbreeze10 · 02/04/2025 22:01

What is his assessment for, OP? Can you go back to him and ask him to explain his reasoning? I also have a history of EDs but am now at a point where I trust my own judgement and understand my own eating patterns.

Binge is also a subjective term - I use it to refer to out of control eating of large quantities as a result of an emotional trigger. The reality is that perfectly healthy eating for one person could be unhealthy for another - we are all different.

It may be that he has misunderstood what you said. I think before you complain you should try and clarify it.

pikkumyy77 · 02/04/2025 22:02

You are wasting your time being angry at someone else when you are exploring your own feelings of shame and distress. So what if the psychiatrist “misspoke” or was incorrect? Why does that affect you? It doesn’t. He doesn’t eat for you or withhold food from you. He is just trying to help you gain control of your ED. Gaining control of your ED requires you to be honest with yourself—you overvalue other people’s thoughts about your body, you overvalue weight and appearance, and you have an unhealthy relationship with food. That’s not his fault.

soupyspoon · 02/04/2025 22:03

No of course not.

This psychiatrist doesnt frequent MN does he?

He's probably picked up a load of bad ideas and hyperbole.

titchy · 02/04/2025 22:04

Surely it depends on what you ate on the other days? And why you’re seeing a psychiatrist? Not sure that the word ‘binge’ is really what is the important thing here….

Original poster
Plave · 02/04/2025 22:04

pikkumyy77 · 02/04/2025 22:02

You are wasting your time being angry at someone else when you are exploring your own feelings of shame and distress. So what if the psychiatrist “misspoke” or was incorrect? Why does that affect you? It doesn’t. He doesn’t eat for you or withhold food from you. He is just trying to help you gain control of your ED. Gaining control of your ED requires you to be honest with yourself—you overvalue other people’s thoughts about your body, you overvalue weight and appearance, and you have an unhealthy relationship with food. That’s not his fault.

I think it’s unprofessional that the psychiatrist did not view my behaviours objectively. Referring to a normal day’s eating/grazing as a binge could be very triggering.

OP posts:
Original poster
Plave · 02/04/2025 22:06

@pikkumyy77 you are very nasty person for using a laughing emoji on a post where I am clearly exasperated about a highly sensitive subject

OP posts:
steff13 · 02/04/2025 22:08

What would you like the resolution to this to be? Do you need to find a new psychiatrist?

NeverDropYourMooncup · 02/04/2025 22:09

So you had breakfast, 1.5 sandwiches for lunch - and some fairly innocuous snack items instead of a dinner?

That's not a binge unless he's using such a heavily loaded term to refer to slightly nutritionally poorer choices - that could be very triggering to somebody in the same way common phrases on here - guzzling/troughing/greedy/far too much, I couldn't possibly eat all of that, for example - can.

You could state that you prefer to use another phrase to describe times when you're trying to deal with emotional hunger? I don't think that would be seen as something negative.

StartAnew · 02/04/2025 22:12

Could you tell him how annoyed you are at his terminology, OP? It could lead to a really helpful conversation about your eating and your feelings about it, and also a better understanding of how each of you uses the word 'binge'.
FWIW, since you normally eat a healthy and balanced diet, I can see that this collection of junk food could be regarded as a binge for you. For some people it might be a day's normal eating or even a low calorie day that they were proud of.

soupyspoon · 02/04/2025 22:12

No doubt when you challenge this you'll be viewed as being in denial rather than him accepting he has used the wrong terminology

5128gap · 02/04/2025 22:14

He shouldn't have referred to it as a binge. It doesn't meet any of the definitions. Fortunately you are aware enough to know he was wrong, so hopefully won't be triggered. If it were me then I'd correct him and request he amended the notes. If he doesn't agree then I'd ask him in what way your eating met the definition of a binge and that he justify his opinion.

Offtobuttonmoontovisitmrspoon · 02/04/2025 22:19

I wonder if it’s maybe the types of food rather than the amount?

Definitely something to discuss when you next see him. The discussion has made you angry and it’s a good opportunity to look into why this has triggered you.

Original poster
Plave · 02/04/2025 22:22

I feel misrepresented and misunderstood by my psychiatrist and tbh that’s shaken my trust in him. I’m frustrated because his choice of words just doesn’t align with reality, and it makes me feel like he’s reducing me to just my past ED rather than seeing the full picture of who I am now. It feels like he isn’t perceiving ME. Just my past issues. Which honestly makes me question his suitability as my dr

OP posts:
Original poster
Plave · 02/04/2025 22:23

Thanks all. So much lovely support being thrown my way. Very much appreciated

OP posts:
Original poster
Plave · 02/04/2025 22:24

StartAnew · 02/04/2025 22:12

Could you tell him how annoyed you are at his terminology, OP? It could lead to a really helpful conversation about your eating and your feelings about it, and also a better understanding of how each of you uses the word 'binge'.
FWIW, since you normally eat a healthy and balanced diet, I can see that this collection of junk food could be regarded as a binge for you. For some people it might be a day's normal eating or even a low calorie day that they were proud of.

I started an email but decided to sleep on it. But I do think it’s important we discuss why his choice of words have affected me

OP posts:
StartAnew · 02/04/2025 22:25

Plave · 02/04/2025 22:24

I started an email but decided to sleep on it. But I do think it’s important we discuss why his choice of words have affected me

Show quote history

Good idea. This stuff can be so triggering, but hopefully it will go somewhere useful. Night.