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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want my 15yr old driving yet?

63 replies

betteronmondays · 02/04/2025 13:37

My son turns 15.5yrs in a month and says can he apply for his provisional driving license in a month and then wants to drive with us under supervision. We live in central London. We drive an expensive car after years of having a cheap small car because we can finally afford one we all fit into. I object to so many things… a 15yr having a say in car decisions. A 15yr driving around London. The cost, responsibility, entitlement, necessity, danger… I mean we hardly even drive we use it to get out of London!
my husband says all he did from the age of 10 is drive and drive his parents around from 15.. I know he’s exaggerating as he was a full boarder from the age of 7yrs. But now I am being made to feel unreasonable…

OP posts:
TeapotCollection · 02/04/2025 13:39

Eh? You have to be 17 to drive <confused>

Runnersandtoms · 02/04/2025 13:39

If you check the law you will find he is wrong. He can apply for a provisional licence but can't drive before age 17.

Iknowaboutpopular · 02/04/2025 13:39

You can apply for a provisional driving licence when you're 15 years and 9 months old. You can start driving a car when you're 17. You can drive a car when you are 16 if you get, or have applied for, the enhanced rate of the mobility component of Personal Independence Payment (PIP)

Quoted from the GOV website.

Surespray · 02/04/2025 13:39

Is he disabled?

elliejjtiny · 02/04/2025 13:41

He can get his provisional license in a month but I'm fairly sure he can't drive until he is 17 unless he gets the higher rate mobility component of DLA.

FrenchandSaunders · 02/04/2025 13:41

Just say no then! Presumably he doesn't earn enough money to pay for driving lessons, insurance, petrol ....

labradorservant · 02/04/2025 13:41

Yes unless he’s disabled he can’t. Well he can but he’ll be breaking laws and be uninsured etc etc!

Cannaeberught · 02/04/2025 13:41

Just tell him he won’t be driving YOUR cars end of.
You’ll need a second mortgage BTW to insure a young driver AND you live in London. Central London. Why in gods name would he want to drive there anyway!

Cannaeberught · 02/04/2025 13:43

The public transport options in central London pretty much negate the need for a car for anyone able bodied.
Has he saved for the lessons? Is he paying for the licence? Petrol? Insurance? If not he can jog on!

Staringatthestars · 02/04/2025 13:44

Your son can only drive with a provisional when he turns 17 and has to be fully supervised... he can apply for a license but he certainly can't drive a car. When he's 16 he could use a moped with his provisional.

Assuming there are no disabilities. If he qualifies for a higher rate of disability allowance he may be able to at 16.

If you and your dh drive, how do you not know this?

Also, even if he was 17, if you're not happy with him driving your car, just say no? You're the parent and it's your car.

wombat1a · 02/04/2025 13:48

Depends on what you drive, I had a test at 16 and 1 month was driving on the road alone straight after that ..... in a tractor.

Original poster
betteronmondays · 02/04/2025 13:51

THANKYOU I thought I was going mad.

OP posts:
labradorservant · 02/04/2025 13:51

If OP lived anywhere but London I think we would be asking about private land etc, but doubt that’s much of that in London. I think people are completely missing the point that he needs to be 17 unless he’s disabled. And then there is the decision about what he can drive.

OllysArmyRidesAgain · 02/04/2025 13:52

Just to say, both DH and I have large powerful/expensive cars (not a boast just a fact) and neither of our DC have ever been allowed to drive them, and one is now 25!

RedToothBrush · 02/04/2025 13:55

Great! He understands at 15, he will need to get a job as soon as he turns 16 to afford lessons and get insurance in time after he's passed his tests.

Well done for your son having such foresight!

Topseyt123 · 02/04/2025 13:55

He can apply for his provisional licence in the next couple of months but then cannot drive on public roads until he is 17 (supervised or not), with the possible exception of a disability, which might allow him to start sooner.

You won't be able to get insurance for him so tell him firmly that it's just not happening. End of story!

peachescariad · 02/04/2025 13:57

Just say no then - simple

akkakk · 02/04/2025 13:59

He can drive a tractor from 16 😄

Original poster
betteronmondays · 02/04/2025 14:01

That would be fun in London 😂

OP posts:
MrsAvocet · 02/04/2025 14:14

To be honest, even when he gets to 17 and can legally drive you may find that the cost of insurance precludes it. It seems bad when they are learning and the when they pass it sky rockets! We live in a rural area where learning to drive at 17 is almost essential due to the lack of public transport so we had to grin and bear it really, but if we lived in a big city with good public transport that enables a teen to travel independently I wouldn't have rushed at it. I imagine it's even more expensive in London than elsewhere. I'd be a bit careful how you discuss this with your DS. Don't tell him that he can't drive until he is 17 because although that's true he'll probably interpret it as meaning that he can drive when he is 17 and that might not be feasible. I think I'd probably phrase it as something like "You definitely can't drive until you are at least 17. We'll discuss it again then."

Chimummy73 · 02/04/2025 14:51

My son learnt to drive aged 14 purely because pals own a farm so he was off road, he did need a couple of lessons when he turned 17 to brush up to test expectation level (ie tweaking bad habits!) definitely wouldn’t have happened if we still lived in London! He’s 24 now and a brilliant driver.
Some places offer experience days for juniors, maybe a birthday present idea so he can try it and scratch his itch?

dementedpixie · 02/04/2025 15:01

He's being ridiculous. My ds learned to drive at 17 but didn't get to drive our larger more powerful cars. Once he passed his test we got him a small 1L car that he could drive

Radiatorvalves · 02/04/2025 15:05

I’m in London and neither of my kids drive - 18 & 20. It’s not uncommon (and very different to when I was there she, living in thee sticks. I sort of wish they’d learn, but then think about the cost. We have an automatic discovery. Totally unsuited to learners. I think they may need an intensive course at some point.

Moveoverdarlin · 02/04/2025 15:06

Both your son and DH are talking bollox. It’s 17.