To be unsure about ever having another relationship?

InSpainTheRain · 30/03/2025 23:31

That's fine. If you are happy then it's all good!

Carouselfish · 31/03/2025 00:39

I'm 44. Feel just the same. Very very very unlikely I'd meet anyone I'd remotely consider.

aurynne · 31/03/2025 01:24

I decided after my separation that I would never live with anyone full time. I came across a lovely man and we've been together for almost 2 years, but each of us have our own house, we choose to spend time in one another's and some time by ourselves. It's absolutely perfect (so far) and I keep asking myself why I never did it like this before.

Perhaps it could be a possibility if you ever find yourself wishing to engage in a romantic relationship? You just need to spell out from the beginning that it's the only relationship type you will consider.

FeministUnderTheCatriarchy · 31/03/2025 01:26

If DH and I split up then I would never be in a committee relationship or live with someone ever again.

I dont actually enjoy living with other people at all. My ideal situation would be us having to houses beside each other, but that's not realistic lol.

SquidProCrow · 31/03/2025 07:49

FeministUnderTheCatriarchy · 31/03/2025 01:26

If DH and I split up then I would never be in a committee relationship or live with someone ever again.

I dont actually enjoy living with other people at all. My ideal situation would be us having to houses beside each other, but that's not realistic lol.

Completely agree with this.

My DP and I rub along OK together and hes a considerate and respectful cohabitant who pulls his weight but as a rule I hate cohabiting with men. Even in the rare instances where they are considerate and do their fair share I don’t think cohabitation is good for relationships: it takes all the fun out of things and stifles people.

If we split up I wouldn’t bother trying to find a new partner and I wouldn’t live with one under any circumstances.

FidosMum84 · 31/03/2025 16:40

If you’re just starting to date you don’t need to think about this for a while yet. And your views may change over time, or they might not.

When I was divorced I didn’t want to live with anyone. And in my first couple of relationships I would never have moved in together.
Then I met someone I wanted to spend my life with and it became important to me. Unfortunately he didn’t feel the same, although he never said this, he just future faked me (I’ve learned that term on here!) and pretended to go along with it.
I enjoy living alone but don’t see this as forever. But the relationship has to be right to give up my peace. I’d be open to it but only with the right person. I wouldn’t mind picking up socks, but only if they pulled their weight as well.

Augustus40 · 31/03/2025 16:56

It is optional to cohabit. Not mandatory!

Sayithowiseeit · 31/03/2025 16:57

I'm the same. I don't want to live with anyone

YourBestFriend · 31/03/2025 16:58

Looks like you are not ready so give it a miss for now. Wait a few more years.

Devilsmommy · 31/03/2025 16:59

FeministUnderTheCatriarchy · 31/03/2025 01:26

If DH and I split up then I would never be in a committee relationship or live with someone ever again.

I dont actually enjoy living with other people at all. My ideal situation would be us having to houses beside each other, but that's not realistic lol.

That's how Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter did it. Houses next door to each other 😂

Ilovelurchers · 31/03/2025 17:01

I am not longer cohabiting with my partner - we are committed and exclusive and love each other but we now spend a long weekend together every couple of weeks on average and it suits me much better.

Increasingly I think people are open to non cohabiting. It means you get all the good bits of a relationship without the shit!

We get on so much better now we live apart - immeasurably so.

FeministUnderTheCatriarchy · 31/03/2025 17:25

Devilsmommy · 31/03/2025 16:59

That's how Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter did it. Houses next door to each other 😂

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Sounds bloody ideal 😁

A big bed to myself (and the cats). No snoring, farting man contaminating my space lol.

We could have dinner and watch TV, then I could send him off home.

I would have beautiful sheets and everything would be perfect and my bathroom would always smell nice 😍

Sigh.... A girl can dream

Gogogo12345 · 31/03/2025 17:28

Isitme27 · 30/03/2025 23:15

I'm really happy in my life. I've got problems, some of them big, I've been through trauma and pain but I've worked really hard to be happy. I've been single 5 years and started dating but I'm not sure I'd want a relationship living with someone again. Picking up someone's dirty socks, having to go and see a MIL I don't like.

I've been in a relationship for the last 8 years with someone but we keep different houses across the road from each other. Although we do spend lots of time together. It works. Have the good bits but not the smelly socks and just go home if he's in mood so not having to put up with that

Augustus40 · 01/04/2025 09:31

I think cohabiting kills it for me.

Original poster

Isitme27 · 01/04/2025 17:06

Gogogo12345 · 31/03/2025 17:28

I've been in a relationship for the last 8 years with someone but we keep different houses across the road from each other. Although we do spend lots of time together. It works. Have the good bits but not the smelly socks and just go home if he's in mood so not having to put up with that

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That sounds great

OP posts:

PassingStranger · 01/04/2025 18:39

Who says you'll have to pick up socks and hate your mil. You might not even have one?

Gogogo12345 · 01/04/2025 19:05

Isitme27 · 01/04/2025 17:06

That sounds great

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It works for us. Nearly 9 years now

PenneyFouryourthoughts · 01/04/2025 19:26

I’m single and living part of the week with grown up DD. Our place smells so much nicer, is tidier and less cluttered with ExH gone. I have a cat who is also a clean goddess. I like it this way. I don’t think I’ll live with a man ever again. If I do get into a relationship ever, it’s going to be separate houses, most definitely. PP are definitely onto something.

Hoggyhoghog · 01/04/2025 19:27

You don’t have to live with them! You do you.