Getting rid of a horse

[IShotTheDeputyItWasMe]

I know nothing about horses/riding so excuse the ignorance.

Reading the spending thread and a few people are commenting about "trading up" their horse. Do people really treat horses like cars?

I know you might need a new horse as a child gets bigger or maybe skills improve but for an adult who is at their peak riding ability, do you really just swop a living creature?

I guess you might say, your personalities don't match but if I were to say, I didn't like my service dog, I'd still get grief for passing him on and getting a new one. And surely after having a horse for a while, you don't suddenly decide you aren't compatible?

No - in that situation I think philosophically it’s easier to justify. There is a purpose, a function which cannot easily be performed another way. I’m concerned for the welfare of those animals but it’s not thoughtless or frivolous.

I think it all depends on tour reason for horses....are they just a small hobby, or do you compete and take part in bigger aspects.

People who compete and take part in disciplines do indeed trade their horses in if they are no longer able to meet the standard needed, more likely for jumping and that side of things.

My horses are a hobby, just local hacking and pets really. So now mine are no longer ridden, it never crossed my mind to trade them in, they're just big pets that enjoy their life eating now.

Yeh this is a bit like the 'for every steak you don't eat I'll eat two' sort of saying. Puerile and pretty dull.

Absolutely horses can become depressed through neglect. But assuming they’re sold or loaned on to a good home where they’re well-treated, and worked with equal kindness and respect, after the initial disturbance of a new place, new stablemates etc, they will not be pining for previous owners.

Neither will dogs. Dogs only ‘need’ people in the absence of other dogs to make a pack with. I looked after someone else’s dog for two years, and for various previous trauma-related reasons, he was very attached to me. I couldn’t have him to live with me (biter, not safe around children) so his owner rehomed him to somewhere (not a family/household environment) where he was one of a ‘pack’ of five dogs. I visited several times, and while he was pleased to see me, he’d absolutely moved on. He was also a new animal. Having more freedom, proper canine companionship (he hasn’t worn a collar or leash since, is walked on open land) etc had totally transformed him. People are now just mildly pleasant background music. The other dogs are his ‘people’. His life is immeasurably better.

I’m not a ‘horsey person’ at all, but I have a daughter who is, so I’ve had to learn.

Horses are not pets. For starters, they’re huge and could quite easily kill you.

They have their own minds, personalities, likes and dislikes. Some don’t like jumping. Some don’t like beaches, water. Some need to jump, or live for eventing. You absolutely can tell when a horse enjoys something and when it doesn’t. I can, and honestly my horsey knowledge could be written on a postage stamp.

If you have a horse that lives to compete (genuinely seen them, know them) and a person who does not want to compete and just want to plod around a field, that horse will be both bored of out of its brains and miserable. That’s also a dangerous combination. And person, horse or both could end up seriously injured or killed. Likewise, if you have someone who is competitive and a horse who just doesn’t have the heart for it, but would love to wander round, out for hacks in the woods etc - they’re not a good match either. If they kept it, but also got another, it would be neglected emotionally at best.

Horses connect with their riders. It’s a partnership, a relationship. Relationships have to work for both parties, or you move on and find a better fit.

There is also the financial burden. At one point, my daughter had 3 ponies - one she was riding, one she was riding but really had outgrown and one she was going to essentially grow into. That cost me £20,000 a year for their livery. It was fine at the time as all were needed.

A year later, one needed to retire (he was loaned so he went back to his owners and lived out his days very happily in a field), and the other was completely outgrown. But she was young and she absolutely loved being fussed over by little ones - it made her so happy. She was therefore sold to a lovely family who had 2 little girls who wouldn’t outgrow her for 10 years (the youngest was a baby). If we had kept her, it wouldn’t have been in her best interests. She was young, bright and wanted to ‘do a job’. She would have been completely miserable. We keep in touch and she’s so happy, the little girls are so happy and we see them at Pony Club and she is clearly well loved and looked after. Keeping her, finances aside, wouldn’t have been right for her.

So now we are down to one pony.

What I would never do is sell or pass on a retired pony (or one close to retirement). They deserve to live out their days happy, with other horses and humans who they know.

It's more of a thing if you are a competitive rider. As you progress, your horse needs to be able to work at 'your' level. A Shetland won't be able to Puissance without a ladder, so you get a horse who can.
Those who ride for pleasure or only at local competitions etc, mostly keep the same one.
Horses do bond with owners, so I don't necessarily agree with the chopping and changing, but riding was not my strong suit, and affording one was definitely not!
Pedigree dog 'owners' are often absent; they hand them over to 'professional showers' for preparation and during competitions such as Crufts.

@Anotherparkingthread do you always let the manners and demeanour of other people define what you consider to be a moral course of action? It's a terrible way to make decisions and makes you seem very shallow.

I'm as shallow as a dish

I wasn't trying to shame anybody, I was expressing the desire to eat a steak the moment anybody starts getting sanctimonious and preachy.

I don’t think you can compare horses to dogs (I have both). We buy a dog to be part of the family, they are a pet to love and cherish all its life. You buy a horse for a job, doesn’t matter if it’s for your 8 year old to have fun on, or a 95k horse to compete on, it’s never going to be a ‘pet’. Once that horse isn’t able or you have outgrown it/dont use it any longer you usually sell. However I know of plenty of people who retire horses as companion horses, or into a retirement livery to happily see out their old age. Most people buying horses do so with very good intentions and will live and cherish that horse, until the need isn’t there any more. No more horses are mistreated than dogs or cats.

So you use a living, sentient being as a tool to do a job?

Yes to an extent, doesn’t mean it’s not loved, happy and well cared for. What an odd question. Do you object to guide dogs too?

I have a horse. I fully intend to keep him for the rest of his life, but sometimes circumstances change.

He does not live in my house. He spends around 22 hours a day not in my company. I do not think he misses me when I am gone. Sometimes other people ride him. This is an important part of his training, in my opinion, because a horse that will happily be ridden by other people is much more likely to end up in a good situation if it comes to it, than ones that are very attached to a single rider.

I don't have dogs, but I often think people overreact about the concept of rehoming dogs. I think the pressure to not do so is far more because of the tendency of people to buy cute puppies and then get fed up with them, than it is because of the dog being too bothered about it. Most people I know with dogs will leave them with a friend or family member or dogsitter or kennels for a week or weekend now and then, and the dogs do not appear to suffer any particular trauma as a result.

Yes, the same way a dog is used as a guide dog for the blind, police dog, therapy animals it’s not just horses

I’m a ‘horsey person’. I have no issue with people selling their horses when they no longer ‘fit’ either in terms of ability/size/lifestyle.

@IShotTheDeputyItWasMe Have you considered the other end of the scale? Young horses are hard work. They take A LOT of skill and knowledge to train, and it’s a long road till the point where they are reliable, steady mounts.

If no one sold their mature been there got the t shirt horses there would be no suitable animals for novices, either adults or children to learn and develop on. It would be nothing short of dangerous and genuinely could end up with both horse and rider suffering life changing injuries or death if you shoved a novice on a 4 year old and let them get on with it!

i have our family pony on a break due to injury… but likely to retire. He costs about £300pcm. I would NEVER sell him or another in similar circumstances- he’d be completely vulnerable to abuse.

However, I personally do not have any problem with the idea of selling horses that are healthy and able to do a job for someone if they are outgrown in size or ability, or if the owner can no longer commit to the lifestyle- hours and hours every day of the year no matter the weather or what else is going on in your life, and hundreds of pounds every month to take good care of them.

I’ve sold on a horse that was too much for me. Another woman started riding her and they got on great so she bought her
if she had been elderly I would have just kept her as a field ornament or if she was unwell then PTS. But she was healthy and young and needed a braver rider

Well I have also grown up in the horse world, and it is not like the one you have described. Obviously if you are producing horses professionally, or competing, then you are selling them on and that’s your job. If you are riding for pleasure then I don’t think there is any excuse to sell your horse on once they have become too old to ride. I think that’s despicable.

Horsey people ime share certain characteristics; they are usually energetic, hard-working, optimistic and down-to-earth and non-sentimental, but the ones I know, are certainly not cut throat about their horses.

They would sell a horse if it turned out that it would be happier in a different role, or their rider couldn’t do it justice, and bomb-proof children’s ponies and schoolmasters get passed in between families where they are loved and cherished, to teach the next generation of children how to ride, but other than that our horses stay put with us and we make a lifetime commitment to them. Of my two horses, one is currently a field ornament and is likely to remain so for the next eight years or so.

The horsey people I know in my circle make huge personal sacrifices in terms of time and finances to be able to keep their horses with them.

Not sure what the purpose of this thrread is though other than to stir? There’s a perfectly good equestrian board on this thread and yet the op has chosen AIBU in which to ask their question?

For people who are in it for the competition aspect or to get better at riding or even who want to challenge themselves or a horse in training, yes they’d trade them in, for those of us (life goal to finally own a horse some day!) who simply want to potter about on a horse and then rest of the time hug them, feed them carrots, brush them and hug them, we’re in it for the long haul!!!!!!

edited to add of course there’s kids and people who outgrow in terms of size too!

Around us there a seems to be a lot of people (mainly women) in the late 40/50s buying dressage horses in order to learn to ride and compete in dressage. Often the horses seem to be quite big, expensive and ummm often a bit out of the league of the new owner.
Horses often get sold when the relationship isn't working or they are loaned out so the rider can buy a new horse. My daughters ex loan horse was owned by someone who never did anything but ride him in a school or practice dressage, then she loaned him out and brought a new horse because her other horse wasn't "good enough" at dressage. Now she has sold that horse, still rides her newer one and it planning to buy a new colt who really should be heading for at least 4 star eventing but will end up being another dressage horse that barely jumps and will also end up being on loan or sold.

I'm not sure that being competitive and considering your horse a pet are mutually exclusive, and for the vast majority of those I know who, this would also be the case. I have competed (endurance is my thing) to a high standard, including FEI, in the past (with the 28 year old), and am just starting down that route with my 8 year old. I am competitive, to a point. I fully intend to go as far as we can. But they are still my beloved pets, and will stop the moment I think her welfare is compromised. For the vast majority of those competing within endurance, I would say that is the case. Maybe because it's a bit of a niche discipline with very little in the way of prize money involved, so very few are riding it professionally. The vast majority are hobby riders who as far as I can tell, trade in far less frequently.

There’s a good example of why someone might sell a horse on a current thread. A clearly considerate and caring owner had a serious accident when her horse panicked and ran away with her, ending in severe injuries and considerable psychological trauma for her. She’s recovered physically, and is fine riding her other horse, but is frightened when riding the more ‘forward’ one one on which she had the accident, even at a walk ina school, despite clearly being very committed to trying to make it work. If she is unable to become comfortable again riding this horse, it would be much better for him to live with and be ridden by someone whose needs he suits, as he’s young, healthy and will be a good partner for someone else who doesn’t have PSTD that he unfortunately triggers.

Sometimes you sell on a horse / pony for reasons such as incompatibility/ safety reasons. Sometimes you are missold and the cute little schooling pony is actually a competent little cutie who needs a better skilled rider.
dodgy dealers are a huge thing online now , they’re outed on fb groups etc.
horses are very expensive to keep it’s not always possible to be able to keep the horse that you can’t gel with and in return often the horse or pony can get miserable. Some horses also want to be field ornaments and some like having a job to do , it’s all individual.

For most horse owners selling a horse is a very difficult and often heart breaking decision.

Unfortunately most people can't afford to collect horses as pets. To put it into context my dd's horse costs about £700 a month to keep and on top of that she has lessons etc.

We might be selling him as he is too much pony for her. It's not a decision to take lightly and I keep changing my mind on what is the right thing to do. If anything we will be 'trading down' to a slower steadier model.

Horses absolutely so have feeling and take time to settle. However most people i'v met love and cherish their horses. There are of course the odd 'wronguns' but generally if you are spending 000s on buying an animal you will look after it well.

As a pp I don't think it's right that people sell very old or injured horses as they tend to get passed from pillar to post and end up in the cheap dealer market. Much better to put you faithful friend to sleep.

Horses don’t bond to their owners the same way dogs do. There is no comparison at all. Horses need other horses and to have access to good turnout.