To ask for Tips on moving on and losing weight

[stucky]

I have just come out of a 5 year relationship. I don't feel sad generally, kind of move between lots of feelings of guilt, discomfort, happiness. A real wheel house and it's all quite unsettling.

I have put on a fair amount of weight during my relationship, primarily due to poor health, a lack of time and laziness. Consequently, I feel quite unattractive. It's also quite terrifying being on the cusp of 40 and single. Any tips?
if someone flirts with me I think they must be demented or I absolutely retreat with anxiety. I think it's the things outside the break up I'm struggling with. When will it feel normal to be flirted with? How do you move on healithily. I don't want a relationship, fling etc I would just like to react to relatively normal things like a normal person and build some confidence in the process.

Not sure what I am hoping for other than some reassurance that I'm not a total weirdo.

My thoughts are to get yourself out and about, doing things you enjoy doing, and mingle with lots of different people whilst doing so, rather than thinking every person you encounter could be a potential mate. Learn to accept a bit of flirtatious banter without thinking it is important.

Re the weight ? Again, find something you enjoy doing to get you moving more. Some people love swimming (one of the best forms of exercise) but others hate it. If like me you hate it, then you will never go often enough for it to have an impact. If, OTOH, you love to dance, and can find yourself somewhere to dance 2 or 3 times a week, you'll be MUCH more likely to go, and that will begin to impact.
I guess you know eating is very much about habits. Make a small change, stick to it, and (along with moving more) see some results, which incentivises you to make another small change. A major 'diet' is almost always too big to maintain.

I'd focus on building up your confidence first

Get outside, get moving

Eat foods that nourish and support your body, so lots of homecooked healthy foods