Page 2 | To feel sad that I got nothing for Mother's Day

mothersdayhmm · 2025-03-30T15:01:38+00:00

Two adult kids. Never missed a Mother's Day before. Not always here physically, but always get nice gifts delivered. Today, I got nothing. No cards, no gifts. One didn't realise it was Mother's Day until about 3pm : he rang me and was very apologetic. The other lives abroad and has sent something, but it won't be arriving any time soon, due to delivery problems. I know it's just a commercialised day, and this is the only time this has ever happened, but I feel really rubbish. Just watched my neighbour and her DD set off for their afternoon tea. Tell me I'm being silly? AIBU to feel deflated and a bit teary?

FrenchandSaunders · 31/03/2025 08:06

I have adult children OP who have left home and I would feel the same as you. It’s hurtful and thoughtless.

ZippyCrab · 31/03/2025 08:26

Bore off with your horrible comments

QuickFetchTheCoffee · 31/03/2025 08:46

I have three adult children.
One is only just an adult, has ("mild") SN, lives with me, and is completely ignorant to mothers day (it's never really been encouraged so not going to start demanding stuff now!).
One lives in same town, she bought me a gift and we went out for a coffee together yesterday.
The other lives over an hour away, was probably working, I didn't get so much as a message, let alone a phone call (though I can't rule out that I may get some form of contact at some point).

Yes I feel a bit miffed that only one of my kids seemed to care - but it's totally irrational isn't it!? I don't really need acknowledgement and fussing over on this one day a year to know my kids love me - if they didn't they'd have cut me out long ago. It's just seeing so many people wafting around with bunches of flowers and afternoon teas and empty waffle on bits of cardboard makes it look like we're missing out. And the incessant advertising. And the people at checkouts wishing me a happy mother's day (really didn't like that).

Original poster

mothersdayhmm · 31/03/2025 10:22

QuickFetchTheCoffee · 31/03/2025 08:46

I have three adult children.
One is only just an adult, has ("mild") SN, lives with me, and is completely ignorant to mothers day (it's never really been encouraged so not going to start demanding stuff now!).
One lives in same town, she bought me a gift and we went out for a coffee together yesterday.
The other lives over an hour away, was probably working, I didn't get so much as a message, let alone a phone call (though I can't rule out that I may get some form of contact at some point).

Yes I feel a bit miffed that only one of my kids seemed to care - but it's totally irrational isn't it!? I don't really need acknowledgement and fussing over on this one day a year to know my kids love me - if they didn't they'd have cut me out long ago. It's just seeing so many people wafting around with bunches of flowers and afternoon teas and empty waffle on bits of cardboard makes it look like we're missing out. And the incessant advertising. And the people at checkouts wishing me a happy mother's day (really didn't like that).

I agree with this. It just makes you feel a bit shit, doesn't it? If I can be bothered to remember all birthdays and really push the boat out, why can't you get Mother's Day right? It's not hard for a fully functioning adult to get their shit together. It just makes you feel like you're not really worth the effort. Hard also to watch others going out for afternoon tea and the likes, when you're sat at home like Billy No Mates.

OP posts:

Linlithgowlady · 31/03/2025 14:23

My three adult children also let me down yesterday. I have been very upset. My eldest son just sent a text, not even a call. My younger two sons, both live at home. One got me nothing and the other got me a gift but it did t arrive until 6.30pm. I feel your pain OP. I feel very unappreciated as I never miss their special days.

Maggiethecat · 31/03/2025 14:25

Linlithgowlady · 31/03/2025 14:23

My three adult children also let me down yesterday. I have been very upset. My eldest son just sent a text, not even a call. My younger two sons, both live at home. One got me nothing and the other got me a gift but it did t arrive until 6.30pm. I feel your pain OP. I feel very unappreciated as I never miss their special days.

People may come along to say that this is being transactional, but I totally understand how easy it is to feel unappreciated especially when you make a big effort for everyone else.

Michie19699 · 31/03/2025 16:32

Hi, I feel you're pain, I have 3 grown up sons and didn't receive anything, all I wanted was a card. They all have wives, and kids so they knew it was mother's day!

Mothersdayandbirthdayblues · 01/04/2025 00:36

i also feel your pain. My oldest grown up son forgot my birthday 2 weeks ago so my husband suggested he redeem himself on mother’s day. Then on Mother’s Day, he just sent me a text! It does really hurt!! I wish Mother’s Day didn’t exist. It brings the opposite of joy in our house!!

Original poster

mothersdayhmm · 01/04/2025 08:41

I'm so sorry others have been treated badly too. It makes you start to wonder whether you've been a good mum! I'm not perfect, but I do know that overall I've been a good mum! My kids have wanted for nothing. I still treat everyone if we eat out together, even though we all earn roughly the same. I'm very generous. Gah!

OP posts:

YourBestFriend · 01/04/2025 09:13

Why is this so important to you? Haven’t they proved their love to you over the years? I’m sick of the entitlement that comes with this stupid day,

Michie19699 · 06/04/2025 07:04

Hi everyone! Just want people's opinion please. I've been with my partner for 26 years now and we've never been well off, but recently he has come into quite a bit of money, over 100k, he hasn't said anything about giving me any so I asked for 5k to help with my debts. He said no he will give me £500!! Am I wrong in wanting more? I feel like he doesn't care about me otherwise he would want to help me out. x

beetface · 06/04/2025 10:03

Michie19699 · 06/04/2025 07:04

Hi everyone! Just want people's opinion please. I've been with my partner for 26 years now and we've never been well off, but recently he has come into quite a bit of money, over 100k, he hasn't said anything about giving me any so I asked for 5k to help with my debts. He said no he will give me £500!! Am I wrong in wanting more? I feel like he doesn't care about me otherwise he would want to help me out. x

You need to start your own thread. You’ll get better responses especially if you provide more detail about whether you are married, have kids, how things have worked financially between you until now etc