Sibling added step kids to group chat

[SunshineAndFizz]

We have a family What’s App group - siblings, spouses and parents. We use it for the usual thing - general chat, sharing photos of kids plus some jokes/banter.

One sibling recently got remarried and now has 3 teenage step children. All lovely and welcomed with open arms to the family (invited to everything, treated the same in terms of presents - genuinely no issues).

Sibling has just added them to our group chat without asking anyone else, no other kids (of phone age) are in the chat. I just feel like having teenagers in the chat changes the vibe completely - sometimes we discuss things that just aren’t suitable for the kids (health updates on an elderly relative or more grown up jokes for the example).

I doubt I’ll say anything but am I unreasonable to to be annoyed? We’ll end up having to message separately or in time create another adults only chat.

Absolutely unreasonable and rude.
Add all other children and then make a new group.

Make a new one and I certainly wouldn't apologise for doing so.

Can you add other teens to that group and create a separate adult only group?

That is exactly what I would suggest. You need 2 chats. One that includes teens from all households and one that does not.

handle this by killing them with kindness. “Hey sibling, you are right. We do need a chat with the teens. Since this one contains some adult content, let’s start a second and move them
there. We will add all the other teens in the family. That way they can all join in the fun”

We have two family chat groups, one with adult dc and one without. It's very useful to keep some things separate.

YANBU. My SIL lets her kids post in our family chat (on her phone) and it's like everyone has to drop everything and reply to their silly photos and messages and chat with them. That pees me off enough, teens being in there would wind me up even more.

We have an adults only one and one including the kids.

You're being unreasonable for not saying anything! Just say you want the group for adults only.

Yeah I do get your point. I think I’m trying not to make them feel excluded, especially with them being step kids/relatively new to the family. No other kids are teenagers yet so it would just be them excluded from a new chat.

YANBU

I would say about having a second group chat so you can discuss things like Xmas presents.

Maybe add all the kids and start a new one exclusively for adults.

Unless you want to have it out with them, you might prefer to be a bit stealthy and wait until there is a grown up issue to discuss and use that as your excuse.