To be sad that I’ve gone from a size 6-8 to a size 10?

[ByCheekyDreamer]

I’ve been doing more pole training since August, and while I’ve gotten stronger, I’ve also gained some muscle. As a result, my clothes don’t fit the way they used to, if at all! I know it’s a sign of progress but I can’t help but feel sad about it. Is this a normal feeling or am I being too hard on myself?

Of course you’re not being unreasonable! You can be sad about all sorts of things. I’d be sad too if I had to buy a whole new wardrobe (well sad for my bank balance, but have a lot of fun doing it!!)

I'm the opposite to you. Was a size 10 but now a size 6 and I really hate it. I'm tallish so it looks horrible on me. It's probably normal to feel like you do because you're so used to being a certain way. You'll get used to it 😊

Do you enjoy your pole training? Do you not think it’s amazing what your body can do? Size 10 is still very slim and more importantly, you clearly have a strong healthy body. Embrace and enjoy it and don’t be ruled by a number on a label

Oh my goodness, that is very sad. Not.
6/8 is too slim, if you suddenly got sick you'd waste away in no time.

No jealousy here. I'm actively trying to put on weight at a similar size.

Ffs

🍪

Honestly yes you are being unreasonable but it’s hardly surprising given the way we have been conditioned to focus on the size of our clothes rather than our strengths and achievements.

I get that! I’m tall too - 5’9 - so any change feels really noticeable. I think you’re right, it’s just about getting used to it. Do you mind me asking what made you drop sizes? Are you trying to get back to a 10?

I do love pole, it’s the strongest I’ve ever felt! I think it’s just the adjustment that’s throwing me off. I know size 10 is still slim but after being a 6-8 for so long, it just feels different. Maybe I just need time to embrace the change!

It was an overactive thyroid after having my DS. Dropped it without trying and no matter what I do I can't seem to get it back on. I'm 5"7 and a 6 on me looks awful 😞 I felt I looked healthier at a 10

Do you like the way clothes look on you at your new size?

Yes, YABU (although I would be really annoyed about having to buy new clothes as I hate buying clothes and begrudge how much they cost). You could simply give up pole and return to your previous size and shape, surely?

You don't know the OP's height. If she is short 6/8 might not be 'too' slim.

Size 6 at 5 9 is quite slim. A strong toned healthy 10 sounds perfect.

That sounds really tough, especially since it wasn’t by choice. It must be frustrating feeling like you can’t get back to where you were. Have the doctors been able to help at all?

None of my clothes fit! But for the ones that still do, I actually like how they look. Looks like I’ll need a whole new wardrobe!

I would be pissed off at having to get new clothes. Its the main reason I dont want to gain weight to be honest, Im not buying a whole load of new stuff again

Yes, I’m frustrated at having to buy new clothes - it’s definitely an expense I wasn’t expecting! But I really enjoy pole, so I don’t think I’d want to give it up just to go back to my previous size. It’s a tough one!

Tbh this is the main reason I don’t like the change. I didn’t expect to have to replace so many clothes and it’s frustrating!

She said she's 5 ft 9.

I'm 5'9" too. I bet you look fantastic and still extremely slim at size 10.

When I went down to a size 10, people said I looked gaunt, so it didn't work for me. I'm average build.

I went from a 6 to a 12. When I was a 6 I was mentally ill and looked too skinny (though still believed I had plenty of meat on me). I'd like to be a 10 now but not so much I want to do any more exercise or eat any less cake!

Be proud your body is strong and healthy OP.

I find clothes in an 8 and a 10 vary massively, some 10's are massive on me while some 8's can feel really tight. I have to try on both to see what fits best. Annoying though if none of your clothes fit anymore.

YANBU to feel that way. It’s your body, and when you’ve been used to it being a certain way for a long time, change can feel very weird.
I’ve struggled with disordered eating most of my life, and when I first met DH, I was dangerously underweight…..but I thought I looked amazing 🫠 That was my normal.
Now I’ve gained 30lbs through eating actual food, exercising, and I am a healthy weight in relation to my height for the first time in my adult life. Initially, I was disgusted with how a healthy weight looked….because I’d spent 15+ years truly believing that skinny was the goal. Suddenly I had boobs and my bum jiggled a little and I had what I call “thigh-brows” at the tops of my thighs just below my hips and it was all very alien to me.
I eventually trained my brain to appreciate that health was the ultimate goal. Medically, I am a million times healthier than I was when I was skinnier. I feel better generally, I have more energy and I’m physically stronger.
As a result of that, I’ve learned to be perfectly ok with the fact that I’ve gone up a couple of dress sizes!
Skinny does not always = healthy. Not by a long shot.