Favourite wedding and why?

[Pasde]

My wedding is gong to be a FORTNIGHT before my cousins. And there are just some uncanny similarities. I fear people are going to compare and would be devastated if my cousin’s was preferred.

We have tonnes of food and a free bar.

What was your fav wedding and why?

TIA!

The things I copied for my wedding from ones I attended that made a difference were:

• Our own Spotify playlist. Never seen a DJ do a good job, usually really naff choices, weird shouting over songs and empty dancefloors. Our dancefloor was full to the end.
• Quieter places to sit and chat away from the dancefloor. Made a huge difference to be able to chill out with people and talk properly. You don't need to organise fun, you just need to provide space for it to happen.

I went to my baby nephew's bathtime, sat in front of a roaring fire with my parents and the guest dog, and had port and cheese in the room of a friend.

The key to getting good music is to get a DJ that isn't a "wedding DJ", but actually plays the kind of music that you're into on a regular basis. We had disco and reggae followed by some drum and bass at ours (appreciate this would be some people's idea of hell, but it was what we and our friends were into).

We also had lots of space to sit down and chat in rooms that were not the room with the dance floor, so not everyone had to listen to the music.8

Every wedding I’ve been to has been different - even those where the venues and format have been similar. I can’t compare them and say which was “best”, because there were different elements of each that I really liked, and different elements that I didn’t. In short, don’t worry too much about anyone making comparisons and finding yours totally lacking.

I found the wedding which had been planned meticulously with a very strict timetable for the day’s proceedings quite hard work because it made both bride and groom and many guests quite tense and worried that something would “go wrong” - but equally, that wedding had a great evening do. Ultimately I’ve always really appreciated it when couples accept that something will probably not go as planned and are totally relaxed about it so that everyone gets to just enjoy themselves rather than feel as though they’re a part of a staged and choreographed theatre production.

PS, the best wedding I've been to apart from mine was in a marquee on a beautifully sunny evening, with a free bar.

I don't think people will really compare weddings? Surely they are coming to see you get married, eat, drink, dance and be merry.

I wouldn't invite anyone who was like that. Fuck them

I sure as fuck compared the weddings of twin brothers which were a year apart.

One was abroad, saved the bride and groom thousands which was spent instead by guests. Really stingy hosting.

One was local, had really generous and delicious food and drink, and free accommodation for guests.

Finger food at the end of the night. Soakage😅 Op all that matters is that you’re happy with the day! Enjoy!

My favourite wedding that I have been to was a registry office ceremony, followed by a wedding breakfast at the local Indian restaurant, and a disco in the grooms parents back garden. It was lovely, so relaxed and fun, and nothing like any other wedding I have ever been to.

the favourite wedding I've attended other than my own was a strange one as the couple didn't even make it a year so I feel bad for them. It was great because I knew so many people there, like literally had someone I knew sitting at every table, sometimes I knew the whole table. There was great food and drink too, but mostly it was the company. However I cant look back at it fondly simply because I feel so bad for the couple, it cost a lot of money and a lot of heartache

I don't think people really compare weddings - in that way do they?

My favourite ones have ranged from the very posh to the almost completely DIY. Afree bar and all the add ons in a country house - incredible food on a beautiful sunny day. One in a church hall with a sandwich buffet, someone's mate being the DJ, dodgy as anything play list - but everyone still up dancing and nipping round to the coop to top up the booze.

What was lovely was the sense that the 2 people getting married really wanted to and had everyone just so happy for them.

One's that haven't worked so well have been where there's been tension or a general feeling of 'this isn't going to last long..'

We aimed for a party feeling for ours....it was quite relaxed - it was basically a nice dinner with a disco afterwards.

The shortest ones are the best.

Why would you care if someone liked their wedding more? You will like yours best and that is all that honestly matters.

However my favourite weddings:

Had enough places for guests to sit while hanging out waiting for the meal.

Had refreshments (not necessarily alcohol but snacks and drinks) while hanging around during photos.

Short photo sessions.

Short, heartfelt and not embarrassing speeches.

A bride and groom who made an effort to work round the guests and have a quick word with everyone.

An most importantly a bridge and groom that looked like they were in love and having a wonderful time.

2 of my DSC and one friend, had summer weddings with short church service, sit down lunch in a marquee in a private field. Live music, dancing, choice of chilli or curry at 10pm and camping. But....what made them special was that children and dogs were very much welcomed.

One of the best weddings was one with a very low budget and very few bells and whistles. Guests brought a dish instead of a wedding gift and so the food was an amazing buffet of awesome food. The bridesmaids all wore clothes they were comfortable in rather than one style, one colour, one dress having to work for all.

Another wedding I enjoyed, the best man did a PowerPoint presentation for the speech which was absolutely hilarious.

Another chose to have poems the bride/groom had written instead of religious/spiritual readings.

Another didnt have any readings at all and the ceremony was done in about 10 minutes flat!

Another wedding I enjoyed, the couple hired a double decker bus to get everyone from the venue to the reception so everyone had a sing song on the way so the party continued rather than it feeling like a big chunk out of the middle as everyone migrated from one place to the next.

Another had karaoke. Another had a cèilidh band. Another had fireworks. Another was on the beach. Another was in a barn conversion.

All of these have been amazing. There's no right or wrong way to do it, just do what works for you, for your guests and for your budget.

My favourite was a rustic sort of affair where the bride wore a hired dress and flowers in her hair. She looked so pretty and natural. She had 2 little bridesmaids (her nieces) who wore different coloured dresses and the tables were simply set (no grand centrepieces or favours, just jam jars with wild flowers in). Photos were kept to a minimum and the reception was a free bar and a hog roast with simple but imaginative side dishes. It was also at an easy to get to venue, so not in the middle of nowhere costing a fortune in hotel rooms or taxi fares. It was really lovely, chilled and memorable.

The good ones have made sure there was always somewhere to sit, free cuppas, enough food, short or no speeches, and everyone knowing at least some of the people they were sitting with.

The worst? My brother’s. We were clearly not wanted (complex relationship), the bride was furious that we’d just had a baby and had to bring it - worse, it was cute! And I had to get a boob out to feed it, which she was disgusted and angry about. I was relegated to a side room for almost the whole thing and barred from the ceremony in case anyone looked at the baby instead of her (this was stated to her friends). The food took ages and was plated meals, but there weren’t enough. The speeches were endless, full of in jokes and innuendos. And I think there was a postbox for money gifts, where everyone could see.

Whilst I also absolutely loved a friend’s wedding with a perfect location, very swish food and a Shakespeare play for the entertainment I do appreciate that’s not to all tastes. My own wedding was at a zoo purely so people would have something to do and talk about if they got bored.

Friends and family are much more likely to spend time exclaiming [at your cousins wedding] that they never catch up and suddenly it's twice in two weeks.

How lovely. You won't have time to spend much time with any of them on your own wedding day but will see many of them again a short time later. Don't stress about the similarities. Weddings are in the most part, all the same.

What breaks a wedding? Bad food or not enough of it. It's literally the only thing [barring freak weather] that people talk about and remember afterwards.

I prefer laid back town hall weddings to posh overdone boring stiff white church weddings.
I went to a town hall wedding 15 years ago and a male guest turned up emulating Michael Jackson's smooth criminal outfit he even had the black arm band I had the giggles all day and quite a few other guests did too.

My wedding was my favourite one because it had everyone I loved and we prioritized the things that were important to us (the food was our favourite things, the live band played our favourite music, their was a free bar serving cocktails that we’d chosen etc).

I’ve been to loads of weddings that I loved. As a guest all I really care about is being comfortable, everything else is just about the bride/groom’s taste (I can appreciate the dresses or flowers look lovely but they don’t really affect my enjoyment).
The best weddings were all really different but the common themes were:

• Plenty of good food, served at sensible times.
• Knowing lots of people (which you can’t do much about, but at least let guests bring a plus one if they don’t know many other people)
• It being fairly relaxed and the bride/groom actually enjoying it (you can tell when they’re super stressed compared to when they just laugh off little mishaps).
• Enough seating during the reception and it being a comfortable temperature (shade if it’s hot, heaters if it’s cold).
• Someone who organizes people to make sure that they’re in the right place at the right time (they don’t need to be militant but if dinner is a 5pm you don’t want half your guests sat there waiting for ages whilst other people are still wandering in at 5.30ish).

The main things that make a wedding are venue, good timings, food and music.

Hopefully your venue is easily accessible/good accommodation. Make sure there’s enough seating for everyone and access to a bar.
If there’s any gaps in your timings try to make sure your guests are entertained, for example while we had our photos done we had a family member (who’s a singer) do an acoustic set. After the meal we hired casino equipment so people could play cards, roulette etc. Lots of food so if you are getting married 1pm or earlier you need canapés, main meal and evening buffet.

My favourite wedding other than my own was an abroad wedding. 5* hotel, about 30 of us for three nights it was brilliant.

My favourite wedding was my own because everything there was what I wanted (music, theme, food, vibe, everything!) and so my advice would be to forget everyone else's options and to make sure your day is perfect for you and your partner. It's meant to be the best day of YOUR lives, not anyone else's and so try not to stress too much at the comparison (although completely appreciate your concerns and feelings at the situation).

My favourite wedding ever was held in a field in a marquee with lots of fairy lights and wild flowers

My favourite ones have been where there's plenty of food (fancy and basic), people not being uptight about kids noises, them being on their phones, where it's not too formal. And I hate long speeches.

Personally I hate lavish, formal dos and I would think anyone who banned social media photos has an over-inflated sense of self-importance.

I often suspect that the length of a marriage is inversely proportional to the amount spent...

I've loved all the weddings I've been at apart maybe from the one where the bride was so stressed about everything going to plan that it was impossible for anyone to relax.

But I have a particular soft spot for the ones I've been to where there was a 'bring your own cake' competition with prizes and a raffle during the speeches (with everyone getting a strip of tickets at their place setting).