Mother’s Day & gifts…

31 replies

PalmTreeAngel · 25/03/2025 15:54

I have quite a good relationship with my mum and fairly close. I have invited her over on Mother’s Day for a Sunday roast and got her some gifts and a card.

Meanwhile, I just know that my now husband won’t bother with buying his mum anything, and I have suggested on multiple occasions he get her a card but I can tell, he’ll forget.

I don’t feel it’s my responsibility to encourage him anymore, and I feel bad on behalf of my now MIL… AIBU?

We got married 2 weeks ago - how does everyone else handle this?

OP posts:

WoodyOwl · 25/03/2025 17:08

LikeSeriously · 25/03/2025 16:13

If your MIL is nice when you are standing in the shop buying your own mother a card just pick one up for her. That’s what I do. My husband does things for me I do things for him. Please don’t let the poor woman not get a card on Mother’s Day. I have just got my husband to write it and as I am going to post office anyway I will post it. I wouldn’t be like she ain’t my mother I am not posting that.

Totally agree with this. Mumsnet seems to think if you do anything nice for your husband or (God forbid!) for your mother in law, you must be an oppressed door mat/idiot. In the real world, people do nice things for each other without expectation or score keeping.

LeanIntoChaos · 25/03/2025 17:25

My mil is epic and helped me a great deal when my kids were little. She is always super helpful and never judgemental and would do anything for me. Buys me thoughtful presents on my birthday and generally is great. My husband is a bit useless, so I have ordered her a nice present and picked up a card when I got my mum's and I'll make sure we see her and treat her on Sunday. It's wife work and I wish he did it, but I love her!

Screamingabdabz · 25/03/2025 17:31

Why do all these useless men not bother with Mothering Sunday and leave it to their wives? Ugh.

TheWorminLabyrinth · 25/03/2025 17:33

Screamingabdabz · 25/03/2025 17:31

Why do all these useless men not bother with Mothering Sunday and leave it to their wives? Ugh.

Because the wives do it, and berate other women as "petty" when they don't believe it is their responsibility!

LikeSeriously · 25/03/2025 17:33

WoodyOwl · 25/03/2025 17:08

Show quote history

Ah thanks! Thought I was going to get roasted for saying that. So for the grand price £3.40 I have a nanny card, Mother’s Day card and a stamp bought and posted. My husband has just thanked me for sorting it. I do know if I was sick or dead he would sort it himself.

merryhouse · 25/03/2025 18:30

It's not your job, no. The point is to show ones appreciation of ones mother.

It does sound as if he is at least under the impression that she wouldn't particularly welcome such a show.

Word of warning though - are you planning on having children? Make sure he's well aware that it's HIS job to help his children do Mothers Day. When the first is a babe in arms that will involve getting and writing a card, getting any presents, and child-wrangling while you have a lie-in. If he does it properly by the time the oldest can buy alcohol he won't need to do anything at all

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