I work in a small business abroad with a close-knit team. One of my colleagues and I were close friends when she first joined. We spent time together both during and outside of work, even going on holiday together. She often displayed anxious and overthinking behaviors, but I didn’t think much of it at the time. She was supportive during some difficult moments in my life, but many of our colleagues found her rude or unapproachable.
During our time together, she would frequently say unkind things about others. I never agreed and always tried to steer the conversation in a different direction. Things took a turn during our holiday when she used drugs and began acting erratically. Afterward, she became distant—not just with me, but with everyone. She refused to speak to me for a while, yet she still attended my birthday celebration and another trip, though she barely engaged in conversation.
Recently, I was promoted and had to address concerns about her conduct. I discovered she had been telling new staff members that I was untrustworthy. When I confronted her professionally in a meeting, she denied everything. I remained composed and handled the situation as professionally as possible.
Today, she requested a follow-up meeting where she openly stated that she dislikes me. She expressed frustration about how people speak about her at work and accused me of lacking integrity. She claimed that I talk about colleagues behind their backs and then act friendly toward them, which is completely untrue. I have always been careful not to gossip, as I believe in addressing issues directly with people.
I feel deeply upset and confused. Why would someone behave this way?