AIBU to go off sick with pregnancy symptoms when I can wfh?

[Namechange739]

I’m due to start my mat leave in 6 weeks and I’m having bad pregnancy symptoms, including horrendous acid reflux which is there all day every day (despite eating healthily, small portions etc) and is causing me to vomit at night and stopping me from getting any sleep.

I’ve also got terrible back pain and I spend most of the day sat in the same position on MS Teams calls which is really exacerbating it.

My GP has given me a sick note between now and my mat leave starting. The note lists the reasons as “acid reflux, back ache and sleep difficulties” which doesn’t really capture the severity of my symptoms! I work in a senior role in a professional job and I have the flexibility to work from home whenever I want to (I usually go into the office 4 days per week but have dropped to 1 day due to these symptoms).

My previous manager knows I’m a high performer and rarely have sick days so wouldn’t be off sick unless I really needed to be. However, I have a new manager who doesn’t know me well yet and I feel embarrassed giving her this sick note as it sounds like normal pregnancy symptoms which I could manage working from home. I haven’t even mentioned my symptoms to her before either because I hadn’t wanted to sound like I was whinging in our first few 121s.

AIBU to suddenly tell her I have a sick note and need to take time off due to my pregnancy symptoms?

Signed off for acid reflux? Have you tried omeprazole?

YANBU to go off sick if you can’t work

Your employer can and probably will start yourmat leave earlier if u go off sick with pregnancy relayed illness

If you aren't sleeping, you wont be productive at work so take the sick note. Don't worry about work.

I always finished at 36 weeks and my last pregnancy from 26 weeks onwards was physically and mentally so draining. I WFH alot but took sick days if I needed to (I think I took 2 or 3 over the 10 weeks). I nearly started maternity leave at 34 weeks it was so bad.

If you’re sick, you’re sick so don’t work. You’re in a senior role and IMO it’s not a great example to be setting to others to WFH if not feeling well as people start taking the mick and WFH all the time instead of going in.

take the note to your manager, explain that it’s been over-simplified as doctors usually do. I’m sure the manager will be fine with you doing this.

or ask for a handover period of a couple of days WFH to finish projects, get people up to speed and then take your sick from then.

enjoy mat leave!

Your employee can put you off on early mat leave I believe 4 weeks before that date on your MATB form. So you could get 2 weeks sick pay and then straight onto maternity. Has the doctor not given you anything for the acid reflux?

If you're too sick to work, then go off sick. But your employer will start your maternity leave early - is that OK with you?

That is what is supposed to happen

I'm 21 weeks and have had awful acid reflux since the beginning. Like you, making me vomit, waking me at night and feeling sick all day long not to mention sore throat and constantly coughing. Doctor gave me omeprazole without question and it's worked wonders. I also have pepto on prescription which can see me through any tough points in the day. I wouldn't go off sick at this stage unless I felt really unable and had exhausted all options because I wouldn't want my mat leave to start earlier than planned.

That’s what I’m worried my manager will think - it sounds like a pathetic reason to go off sick! I’ve just been prescribed omeprazole at the same time as being given the sick note. Until now I’ve been taking 10 rennies and gaviscon per day which made very little difference and I’m up vomiting every night. I’m also exhausted and have excruciating back pain so it isn’t only the reflux. But I’m conscious all of the symptoms sound like a normal part of the pregnancy and it looks like I’m just using it as an excuse to get time off.

No, they can’t legally start my maternity leave until 4 weeks before my due date and I’m already starting my maternity leave 4 weeks before my due date as it’s a multiple pregnancy (so babies are expected to arrive several weeks before my due date anyway).

Don't be a martyr. Your health and your baby's health is far more important, and you have your GP backing you up.

Take the time off and rest.

My due date isn’t in 6 weeks, that’s my mat leave start date. My mat leave is already planned to start 4 weeks before my due date as it’s a multiple pregnancy. My concern is about my professional reputation and how it will appear.

As someone who pushed through to 37 weeks completely exhausted and stressed out of my mind because I was so exhausted I couldn't work properly OR rest properly, take the time off. Women who have a manageable pregnancy don't get it. From around 32 weeks, my pregnancy was pure hell. And I was SHIT at my job from that point. I barely got 4 hours of work a day, spent the rest of the day crying about how shit I am at my job and spent all night in pain and stressed. Just start mat leave early, you get 12 months of it in the UK anyway.

Your mat leave will start automatically if you are off sick within 4 weeks of your due date, if you are happy with that then take the 2 weeks sick leave and start mat leave at 36 weeks.
If you are too sick to work- which it sounds like you are- don’t feel guilty about it. Back pain is no joke even without not being able to sleep!

If the note is factually correct and confirms that you are not currently fit for work, what more do you really need it to say?

The omeprazole will hopefully be a game changer! YANBU if you are struggling with the symptoms to the point it makes even WFH difficult- some women sail through pregnancy and some don't, but that is because the range and severity of symptoms is very broad.

You are carrying multiple babies- I would like to think your bosses would be able to see that it is likely to be harder on your body than an average pregnancy. Try not to worry about what the new manager thinks- prioritise you and your babies.

Ah, right, so you're actually 10 weeks away from your due date? It's strange that your GP has signed you off for 6 weeks, why not take a week off to see if the medication improves your acid reflux and then re-evaluate? Ultimately, if you're too sick to work then you can't work.

No they can't start your mat leave earlier as you've said. Is this your first pregnancy to this stage? 100% take the time off, sounds awful, I really suffered whilst pregnant, thought i had to firm it with my first, didn't bother with my second

You don't need to be embarrassed, your new manager will either understand or they won't but legally they can't do anything and anyone with any experience with pregnancy, themselves or family etc, would understand

In that case hand in the fit note and go off sick. Your priority is you and your baby not work 😊

I think I would put this all on the table and ask your new manager what they think. Explain the severity of your symptoms where the note fails.

I think any manager worth thier salt will tell you to go off sick and wish you all the very best.

And if they don't, the ball is still in your court. You still have a sick note and absolute justification to go off sick.

Are you 100% sure that it’s Reflux and not gall stones? Gall stones had me up vomiting all night and gave me awful feelings of heartburn and an ache in my back but it was actually gallstones. It

Take the omeprezole. I’ve had acid reflux for 20 years, game changer.

I would explain the severity of the symptoms to her as well as giving her the note. If you are too ill, you are too ill. I am in quite a senior well paid position and I have never been able to shake the feeling of my pregnancies being inconveniences to my employer and that i was being cheeky by making use of the policies available to me. Which I know is mad but that's how I have always felt. Have confidence in your position and your reputation and try not to think like I did 😂

I had all of these symptoms and managed to work from home until 38 weeks. I didn't want them to start my mat leave early and leave me less time with my baby.

Have you thought about what you would do to manage it better if not working? I knew i'd probably sit scrolling my phone which is no different to being on my work laptop. That being said, I was on low concentration duties at the end and your workload and how you're coping is key.

I think we all worry about maternity related stuff and work. It shouldn't really be this way, but the people who take the mick ruin it for is all! Forget about your reputation, you are a good employee and they wouldn't want to see you struggle on i'm sure.