To take him to court?

[Ginnyaletranger78]

Looking for advice. I'm not in UK. Ex-partner is. We split up 9 years ago. We have a flat and a house together. The flat is rented out. I live in the house with my child (who I've had since the split. On my own. By choice).

When he left (I wanted to split), he didn't ever ask what I was doing with the houses. Didn't ask to sell. Didn't ask who was living in flat. Didn't help with charges, upkeep, taxes... nothing. He just never asked. He DID pay half the mortgage for a while. But there are a lot of co-ownership charges for flat. Insurance. Owner taxes....

Two years ago, he got in touch to say he wanted to sell. Fair enough. I agreed, but asked that he sort it out. We agreed to sell flat first. I gave him tenant contract and whatever he asked for. At this time, I was taking care of my mum. She was terminally ill. She has since died.

I'm a free-lancer. I lost a lot of clients when I was caring for my mum. I've been struggling. Financially and emotionally.

I asked him to help me pay taxes on houses, charges, insurance, mortgage. I asked for help in November. I've sent him dozens and dozens of messages asking for help. Just to pay his half. He won't reply. Here, the money gets taken out of your account by government. I keep getting in a real mess.

I can only message him on FB. I don't have his phone number, address, email.

I can't really afford a lawyer. And being in a different country doesn't help. What can I do?

I'm grieving my mother, working as hard as I can, and just sinking deeper into debt. I feel so lost. I can't cope. I can't even afford to sell the houses, but would be willing to do so with his help. He's just doing nothing. No contact. He's reading the messages and ignoring me.

The house isn't worth much and is still mortgaged. I could maybe afford a small house with half the flat money. Maybe. I won't get another mortgage. I'm not making enough. Unless I find another job and stop free-lancing. I don't know. I need help.

I feel so ashamed that I'm not coping. I miss my mum. I've stopped doing the housework. It's all too much. I used to be such a coper. I daren't even open letters. I daren't admit to anyone what a mess I'm in.

Are both properties in the UK? Are you both on the mortgage and deeds? Or is the flat the only property in the UK, with the house being in the country you are residing? You need to clarify these details, as it's not clear. You are obviously struggling financially, and selling the flat in the UK, would be a good option for you. Unfortunately, I can't see how you can sell without having your ex partner's agreement (verbal isn't legally binding) and as you don't know where he's living or have any contact details it may not be easy to do. He doesn't want any financial responsibility for the flat, hence why he's not responding to you. You may need to obtain legal advice to be honest, a sale can be forced in some circumstances, but that's usually in divorce cases.

Both properties are abroad. There is a tenant in the one we want to sell. My ex wants to sell, but he's not doing anything to help. In the meantime, the bills are mounting and I can't pay them.