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Would really appreaciate your opinions!! My ds turns 1 soon and has tons of toys, books and clothes (we have 2 older children) so we thought if people would like to we thought it'd be really lovely if they could give the money they would have spent on a donation instead to a children's charity or perhaps towards vaccinations for babies in the dev world etc. (Have't really ironed out the details yet) I suggested it first to a relative and she was actually a bit funny about it (she'd already bought something) I assured her that her pressie would be fantastic and it's up to others. Now I'm doubting if it's a good idea and whether I should suggest to others. Any thoughts? I don't want to offenmd just thought it was a nice little legacy for my ds who tbh is equally happy bashing wooden spoons around at the moment!

I see your pov, but I think you should give people the choice. Some of us really enjoy giving presents, and would like to choose the cherridees we support. I think it's a nice ideas and FWIW I would prob give a small present and make a small donation too.

That is a really nice idea. I think that maybe if someone asks "does lo need anything" then you could mention it. That way you won't be offending anyone.

Hmmm ... it's a lovely idea in theory.

But I think you need to make it clear to people that the donation is an option, and that they are welcome to buy a present for your DS if they prefer.

It just somehow seems a bit sad for a first birthday, not to get a few pressies to open - which I know makes no sense, as he won't know the significance, but that's just how it makes me feel.

Another option is for you and your DP to forgo your birthday or Christmas presents instead, and use that money for the charity idea.

Personally I'd be happier with that if I were a present giver in your family.

I went to a first birthday recently, invites said no gifts please but donations to xxx baby unit (where child's older sibling had spent many months). We all happily obliged. How much plastic does one toddler really need to own anyway? I think its a good idea.

It's a very good idea. People will be happy if they feel they have the choice.

Its an excellent idea, I think the tide is turning, and most people will love to go along with this.

Thanks for your thoughts, am feeling more encouraged! We have been looking at Oxfam website and think we will spend whatever we get on vaccinations for babies. Think it'll be a lovely legacy for my ds when he's old enough to know about it.

We do this for Christmas, and have had a mixed reaction from relatives, friends were all fine with it. Some relies wanted to still buy and donate, others just refused to donate and bought presents anyway. We made it quite clear that we weren't buying presents in return, but instead sponsored a child in the developing world. It works for us, the children are learning about compassion and how lucky THEY are, so it's good all round.

if thats what you want to do i cant see why people should have a problem with it in fact i think its a great idea,
good on you.

I think it's a fab idea

I think it's a good idea too though immediate family (PIL, aunties etc) might be a bit hurt especially if they wanted to get something Significant for a first birthday (ie something to keep for years) so better to make it an option for people.
And it's certainly better asking for people to do the oxfam-unwrapped type thing rather than (hiliarous though this is) the scheme being used by the self-righteous to punish any relatives or friends they have decided are greedy or materialistic.

Bear in mind though that some people think their charity donations are their own business and find a lot of these schemes a bit smugly wanky.

Good idea, just maybe not for the 1st birthday??