I don't understand men

[Isitme27]

Had a good date. He said he wanted to see me again. Sent a very enthusiastic message about meeting again. But he's going away for 2 weeks in 10 days and says he won't be free until he gets back. Surely if you were interested you would make time in those 10 days?? Makes me think of the old "he's just not that into you"

Men aren’t that complicated. If he wanted to he would. OLD is a numbers game. He’ll have three or four dates on the go and you should too.

He's not that into you.

I agree

What is the rush? He’s essentially a stranger. He’s not a friend yet let alone a lover. Rational people don’t revolve their schedules around strangers or pine for strangers.
When I’m preparing to go on holiday I have a great deal to do at work to prepare, then there’s shopping, packing, giving an extra clean to the house because the pet sitter will be living in. Usually I have the car serviced before a journey and am just generally preoccupied the week before. A new acquaintance would have to be back burnered.

The fact that he’s not behaving dateless and desperate is a good sign, not a negative. He’s secure and has a busy life. Would you rather get to know someone like him or an aimless loser staring at his phone awaiting the next text from someone he barely knows?

Exactly.

Not everyone is in a mad rush either. Some people want to date and get to know others as part of a well-rounded life, not as a mission to pair off with the first passable specimen.

It’s a journey, not a destination.

What I don't quite understand is why you seem to need to somehow divine what he's doing, thinking, intending in order to decide what you're going to do.

Don't.

Just do whatever it is you want to do.

One of the very best pieces of advice I have ever heard is this 'If he makes you feel uncertain or confused or doubtful, then he's just not in to you.'

He's not in to you.

Does it work the same if women act the same?

I'd move on, if he contacts you respond, and see how things are when he gets back, but in the meantime I'd still be dating and trying to meet someone else.

I dated because I wanted to meet someone to spend my time with, if they didn't have time to spend with me then they aren't fulfilling that role.

I also think in the early days you put your best foot forward, and it sets the tone for the rest of the relationship. He could find time one morning to meet you for coffee, or something-not seeing someone for 24 days when you are in the trying to impress them stage is just shitty.

Good luck

Yup, it's very simple. If a man is into you, you will know!

Maybe he has plans or family/friends arrangements before ge goes on hols? Just go on dates in the meanwhile and see what happens when he comes back. You're taking this too seriously

Yes, I would have thought so?

Women don`t understand men men dont understand women.

Men understand well enough when they really like you.

I wouldn't agree with this, at all. I understand men implicitly, they are very simple, straightforward creatures (thankfully).

I'd simply ride this one out, see what happens, and not be waiting around for him in the meantime. Date others, if you've a mind to.

Certainly don't send any begging messages saying you'd like to see him before he goes.

Only if you think sex roles construct entirely different modes of relating to the world, which they don’t.

Maybe he has a life. You should keep dating/doing your own thing/getting on with your life and if he contacts you when he gets back, you can decide if you want to see him again.

It was just one, good date, don’t set too much store by it.