AIBU? HV Review- Baby 11 months autism?

[MummaHud]

hey I’m new to MN! and was hoping for some advice, stories? Honesty, etc etc apologies it’s long.

My little boy had his 1 year HV review, he was 11 months at the time of the review, but 9.5 months corrected. ( he was 6 weeks premature so they go by due date for milestones ) They gave me a questionnaire that was 9months and 0 days - 9 months and 30 days to fit in with his ‘actual age’

He is doing really well with his gross motor, but not so well with his communication.

There were 6 communication questions…

1. Does he make sounds like Da, Ba, Ka, Ma- ✅ he does.

1. Does he make sounds together like Da-da, Ba-ba, Ma-ma- ✅he does

1. Does he imitate the sounds he makes back to you, if you say them first- for example if I said

Dadadada, would he copy me? - 🚫 No he doesn’t

1. Does he follow commands without you showing? Like ‘come here’, ‘give it to me’, ‘put it back’ - 🚫 No he doesn’t ( although since that review 2 weeks ago, he does follow ‘come here’ albeit hit and miss now )

1. Does he follow nursery rhymes without you showing? - such as bye bye, pat a cake or clap your hands - 🚫 No, he doesn’t - he can clap but wouldn’t copy or follow instructions too and he hasn’t waved at all yet.

1. Does he associate words with things such as Dada for daddy, Mama for mummy and Baba for baby.. 🚫 no he doesn’t - but he has since the appointment started crawling to the room I’m in saying mamamama, or in the cot in the mornings making the mama mama sounds, so maybe he’s beginning too?

She was saying things like ‘what he doesn’t say sounds that resemble HI’ for hello..

It’s left me walking away feeling terrible and it dragged me straight into a Google pit - words such as autism came up, which doesn’t worry me - but I worry about my son in terms off I want him to be happy and ok.

Is it quite normal for this age to not do these things and then catchup? I feel like I’m at a dead end he’s so so so much more interested in crawling and climbing than sitting and learning words and actions.

He’s so social in other ways, crawls to you, makes eye contact, reponds to name, babbles, gets excited seeing his sister, wants to play / follow her, laughs and smiles. If we put the blanket over him he will put it off and laugh when we say ‘boo!’ He just won’t put it back over himself to initiate play?

Are these reviews here to make us feel worse? He’s 11.5 months now, 10 months corrected xxx

Would it help to know that my ds passed all those checks, and yet is now a happy, well adjusted, sociable in his chosen circles, polite, about to head off to university, autistic 17yr old?

Truly, they are so not worth worrying about!

He sounds lovely and I wouldn’t be concerned at all! I’m also not in England and I think we have different checks, none of these things were even on my little boys 12 month check. I had my first son in England and the HV was always finding fault with him for missing one thing in each area or another whatever it was, he is four now and thriving, so bright and curious and clever. Do not even give it a moment more of your energy, just enjoy your sweet boy

From what you said he would have scored 20 in the communication area which a lot of HV call the emerging skills area. They’ll probably follow up with you in a few months, but honestly I wouldn’t stress yourself out too much. It takes a lot of focus for them to gain skills and when they’re more focused on physical skills sometimes the other areas take a bit more time.

Hi ! My baby was not premature but could have written your post 2 years ago. I spent endless time worrying about him "failing the tests" and struggling with weaning until he was 15 months old. I constantly feared the future and how my son was going to develop. He is such a chatter box now and have the opposite problem of him eating soooo much! Absolutely loves food even though I cried so many days wondering how I would ever get him to eat when he refused so much. My son actually didnt pass so many more of the communication boxes than yours and now I can say I have absolutely no concerns with his development. I read so many posts like this when I was mumsnetting for reassurance and told myself "that won't be us" and having no hope for 5he future and now here I am writing the same thing. What I mean by that is I know it is easy for someone else to say all these things when they have already been through it but I honestly lived and breathed the anxiety I can feel off of your posts and it was all for nothing. Just ignore it and enjoy your son. Honestly if I have any more children I am throwing those assessments in the bin

I'd have been gobsmacked if your baby had been doing all that at that corrected age. Please try to relax.