Solving a parking riddle

[trufflesandolives]

Picture this... I parked my car always leaving more space from the neighbouring left bay so I can open my rear left car door more easily to get 10 mo DS in and out more easily. While we were away from the car, a car parks in the bay to our left but occupies more of the right side of their bay leaving little space for me to put DS back in the car. There was also a van parked in the bay to our right. So when we returned to our car I carefully opened the rear left door and put DS in his seat. As I was doing so though my hip touched the car door and the car door touched (not bashed) the car to our left. I wasn't worried as it only touched and when I glanced to check I saw no damage. I got into the driver's seat, shut my car door, connected my phone to the car... and then I got a knock on my window. "Can you come out please" said a straight faced middle aged man. "Can you open your rear door so I can check something" I guessed where this was going and so I did. "Thought so. I'll take your name and number and I'll send you the bill". I was shocked and had to bend down and inspect his car door closely. Sure enough there was a small white scratch mark; barely noticeable. I gave him my details, apologised while looking and feeling baffled and left. Upon reflection however, I realised that this is likely to happen again and there wasn't much I could have done differently given my 10 mo passenger's safety needs. Therefore, as a mother I'm probably doomed to paying very high car insurance with all the claims I'll be making while working reduced hours and having a million other things to worry about or AIBU?

You can buy rubber strips that stick to the edge of the car door to stop this happening. Or be more careful.

You shouldnt have given your details.

Do people so freely volunteer their personal info like this to others/randoms without a second thought?

Crazy.

There's no riddle, you hit their car with your car door. Park somewhere else if the spaces are too narrow for you to open the door enough for your DC.

Not a random though is it. It's the owner of the car she hit with the door and marked

Unless they are related, the car owner is still a random to the OP.

you bashed someones car door. What did you expect?

I'd have told him to jog on. If the mark was that small he never could've proved it was you.

Were there no mother and child spaces left? What a shame, you were unlucky.

It's worth parking in the far flung reaches of the car park to avoid other cars.

If you refuse to give your details the other person just gives your reg plate to their insurance and they’ll chase your insurance company. Not giving your details does not absolve you of fault or stop you getting the bill for repair. The op scratched the other car and needs to pay for it to be rectified. Find a better place to park in future, the end spot in a car park is perfect if you want to guarantee space on one side.

Stuff like this is 50-50, he said/she said.

Unless of course the other driver had evidence to show his/her insurer.

OP is still a bit naive to freely offer up their details willy nilly TBH. Data protection and all that. This wasnt a 5 car pile up.

Yabu. You damaged the car and have to give details.

Did you take HIS details, take photos and his reg plate details too?

You occupy more of the right side of your bay, so did they 🤷🏻‍♀️ either use parent and child spaces, park on the far side of the car park where it’s less busy, get bumper strips for your car door to stop marks or get used to paying for damage you do to other cars.

Im not sure why there’s always people on car threads acting like taking paint off / scraping your paint onto another car isn’t damage. It can’t have done that from a simple touch, it would have needed a certain level of impact to damage paint or leave paint behind.

That’s what 360 degree motion detecting dash cams are for and that kind of attitude is the exact reason why people park in the middle of two spaces, making less spaces available in car parks. How about people own up and pay for the damage they do to other people’s property?

Absent details from the OP as to whether the parked car had a 360-deg motion detecting dash cam - the balance of probabilities applies in situations like this.

And thats what insurers would weigh up.

At no point did I say the OP shouldnt pay up. I just find it amazing people would pony up all their personal info so freely on something this trivial (according to the OPs version of events).

I'd have driven off and given the grand sum of zero fucks. As said, this wasnt a 5 car pile up.

A lot of people lease their cars and are charged for every single mark on their paintwork when the lease is up so hardly trivial to them.

I usually try and get my finger in-between my door and the other car if it's tight - that way it can't make a mark.

Oh come on, bashed? How dramatic.

No idea why you're gunning for me here.

I'm not responsible for the damage. 😂

As for people leasing their cars or whatever, I really couldnt give a flying fuck. 👍

Well it's not really a riddle because you damaged the car and should pay. I wouldn't be in the slightest bit bothered by that because my car is old and has a couple of scratches on it anyway so I'd not be worried but if it was a new car I was paying a lot for and in good condition to start then yes I'd be annoyed you damaged it too and expect you to pay for the damage.

If the riddle is how you get your child in & out in tight spaces well you do it carefully, get the strips for the doors so if you do touch another car it's less likely to leave damage and look for end spaces etc while he's young enough to need you to put him in the car. That's your responsibility to sort, not expect everyone to just put up with the damage you do to their car.
Screaming and shouting about it would have been unreasonable but doesn't sound like he was , he's taken your name and number to contact you to pay for the damage you caused. He was at no way at fault here, you may not have done it on purpose but you did do it, so that's your responsibility, it's not his issue that you need to get your child in his seat, that you're a mother and have a million other things to deal with, to the extent that he shouldn't say anything if you damaged the car or not expect you to pay for it.

same, I wrap my hand around the door

I wonder if the bloke will actually claim. Surely if you've just left a minute mark, that can probably be buffed out, it's not worth him claiming and putting his insurance premiums up? These things happen. A woman with a toddler bashed my door gently recently while I was in the supermarket car park. She looked mortified but I smiled and left her to it as it was an accident. My car is not cheap, but it's just a car.

I guess next time it might be best to not apologise, because for all you know that mark could have already been there.

If you can’t find a Parent and Child space then you need to find a space on the end of a row and park either forwards or backwards in it so your child’s door does not have a car next to it.

If he does send you a big bill, send it straight back and tell him to go through his insurance. A tiny scratch like this is likely to be polished out and cost no more that £30. I know because exactly the same thing happened to me.

So because he didn't magically know that you wanted him not to park in a certain way, you think he's done something wrong?

You marked his car. Park elsewhere or be more careful.