I really need some advice here please. Not sure if I am going crazy or my fam are just gone off completely off the rails and there is no help for them. Especially from people who got rid of their toxic family.
I was abused by my parents when I was growing up, called ugly names, being beaten is on the list too. My mother used to drink and she would be all over the place, so whenever me and my sister would come back home from school if she was drunk we would hide in our bedroom. Father was away at work or he wasn’t working for the time being. They would fight, call each other names too.
I left them at the age of 18 from another European country and moved to England. I was scared for my life, but I thought it can’t be worse than living with both of them.
She stopped drinking and he started doing it. He would go with different women and m mother would still stay with him. Me and my sister confronted him about this, I was probably around 14 or 15 he told us very ugly things. He even said we were not his kids anymore. Bear in mind, he still says the same thing to this day and I am at the age of 33.
He beat me so hard at the age of 16, hitting my body and head so hard with all of his strength. I had to go to school with swollen eyes from crying and bruises on my body - all because a boy sent me a message. He called me the word w* as according to him I was looking for a bf and not to study at school. Not true, but whatever. Bear in mind he has called my sister the same exact word 100 of times. Again, no real reason. He is just an awful human being.
Even to this day, always being toxic, I thought limiting distance will help but it does not. I ended up going through so many therapies in the last several years, ending up with prolactinoma with a small tumour in my head - all thanks from the stress, the PTSD they gave me and my sister.
Every time I thought they are getting better, I am wrong. Both of them are getting worse, still toxic, saying whatever they want to say thinking there wont be any consequences. When I confronted him when he said he really wants to see me and hug me I said oh really? Is it because you feel bad how you always had a go at me and my sister when we were kids? He lost his crap completely, saying I should be ashamed of myself and what else not. I had to put the phone down as someone arrived at my house and my mother wrote me 10 messaging saying I should apologise to him, he said I am not his daughter, I should never talk to him again.
It never ends, she has always supported him no matter what. But I am getting extremely tired of their bull crap,I am happily married. One time my mother told me my husband will leave me because he will realise I am awful person. All because I confronted them.
I am trying to focus with my husband on building a family, I cannot keep allowing them to stress me. If I was pregnant it would be the same thing or if I had a child.
How did you got rid of your toxic parents?
ps I grew up in Eastern Europe, so we never had child protection services, sadly.