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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is there a good day to hand in your notice? Also, your experience of starting a new job after being stuck in a rut for many, MANY years.

32 replies

CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 17:26

After many years of working for the same company (private sector) and having lots more responsibility with no pay increase, no sick pay and no HR department, alongside a GM who is a narcissist, I started searching for another job.

I have been offered a new job within the public sector. Lots of benefits and promotional opportunities, alongside great holiday entitlement, sick pay etc.

I am nervous for the change but tbh, it can’t be worse than my current employer. I have worked in the public sector many years ago, wish I had stuck it out but there we go.

I’m 55 and I’m hoping that my final years of working will be much more positive with much more security.

Question, as it’s been some years, which day is it best to hand in your notice? There will be a few colleagues who will be really upset and I don’t want to ruin their weekend, but I don’t want to hand it in on a Monday and have a week of talking about it.

I’m still waiting for written confirmation so I won’t do anything before then, I’m excited and nervous at the same time but deep down, this is the right move for me.

Also, it will be hard not to tell the boss exactly what I think but know I need to keep my head held high and leave on a positive note, as difficult as that may be.

Also would be really good to read any positive stories of changing jobs later on in life. I’ve had enough where I am, I’m expected to do everything with no pay rise, no incentive, moral is extremely low, it’s time for change.

OP posts:
thechampselysee · 16/03/2025 17:30

as soon as you have it in writing. I assume your notice period is more than one week so what day you do it makes no difference. if you want to be annoying you could do it the day before you go on holiday for 3 weeks?

CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 17:34

That would be an ideal scenario tbh! 🤣 sadly, I won’t have enough holiday entitlement to put this into practice.

My notice period is one month. Not sure if my boss will want me to leave immediately or stick it out for one long month.

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MananaMananaPenelope · 16/03/2025 17:34

I’d wait until confirmation of satisfactory references before resigning if you rely on your salary.

I’m public sector and desperately seeking a return to the private sector (at your age).

GeorgeMichaelsCat · 16/03/2025 17:35

Just do it

CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 17:36

MananaMananaPenelope · 16/03/2025 17:34

I’d wait until confirmation of satisfactory references before resigning if you rely on your salary.

I’m public sector and desperately seeking a return to the private sector (at your age).

Be careful leaving the public sector for private. You really do have many more benefits in the public sector.

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ThinWomansBrain · 16/03/2025 17:36

Just hand in your notice when the new role is confirmed - colleagues may be surprised, but I honestly doubt it will ruin their weekend. If you prefer to let the dust settle, can you negotiate a days' annual leave after you've given your notice to get your head together?
It doesn't sound as if your current organisation conducts exit interviews - but keep if processional with reasons for leaving - partially not burning bridges, but all you'll gain by being brutally honest is an uncomfortable last few weeks working your notice.

I'm in my 60s and recently moved from one discipline to another - thoroughly enjoying it. Good luck in your new role.

PonyPatter44 · 16/03/2025 17:41

Assuming you don't have to wait for security clearance or any other pre-approval checks, then give in your notice any day you please! There is no "best day", because the quicker you give notice, the quicker you can leave.

In my part of the Civil Service, you give notice the day you get an internal offer (unless it requires higher security clearance) because they usually hold onto you for ten weeks. It is frankly a pain in the bum, but its just the way it is.

CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 17:42

ThinWomansBrain · 16/03/2025 17:36

Just hand in your notice when the new role is confirmed - colleagues may be surprised, but I honestly doubt it will ruin their weekend. If you prefer to let the dust settle, can you negotiate a days' annual leave after you've given your notice to get your head together?
It doesn't sound as if your current organisation conducts exit interviews - but keep if processional with reasons for leaving - partially not burning bridges, but all you'll gain by being brutally honest is an uncomfortable last few weeks working your notice.

I'm in my 60s and recently moved from one discipline to another - thoroughly enjoying it. Good luck in your new role.

That’s wonderful to hear that you’ve made such a positive move, thanks for posting this.

There are a couple of colleagues who I’m close to and will be really upset, I’m thinking of them and it really will ruin their weekend. I think a Monday might be the better option (after written confirmation of course).

No HR so no exit interview but I will try and keep my leaving professional, however difficult that may be.

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MananaMananaPenelope · 16/03/2025 17:42

CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 17:36

Be careful leaving the public sector for private. You really do have many more benefits in the public sector.

That’s not always the case, I’m paid almost 40% less than an equivalent job in the private sector. I’ll go back to an equivalent pension contribution on the higher salary, more leave, family private healthcare, gym membership etc., etc.

I top up my public sector salary by consulting.

CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 17:44

That’s great if you have a great security in your private sector job. Sadly it’s not been the case for me.

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Munnygirl · 16/03/2025 17:45

I moved jobs after 21 years in the same job and it’s the best thing I could have done. In fact I wish I did it sooner.

CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 17:51

In my private sector job we were suddenly told that there would be no sick pay, there have been no pay increases, no bonus (not a given, not in the public sector I know, but no guarantees where I work).

A member of staff was sacked without having a verbal, written of final warning. Awful behaviour by the owner of the business.

I’ll take public sector any day.

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CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 17:53

Oh and I instantly get more leave in the public sector (26 days plus BH) than almost 20 years in the private sector.

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takealettermsjones · 16/03/2025 17:55

Civil service is good for flexibility, work/life balance, and job security. In my experience, it's lacking in almost every other way. The pension isn't even that much better any more!

middleeasternpromise · 16/03/2025 17:58

I recently changed jobs at the same age as you, its been a wonderful opportunity to refresh my perspective on the world of work. I would try to focus on the positives, you have secured an offer that is better than what you have, those facts cannot be argued with. Unless there would be productive change, I would refrain from sharing a list of grievances, what would that achieve? People often know the reality of things even without you spelling it out, keep things professional. It is not your responsibility to improve things for your colleagues by staying they have to make their own choices as you have done. I have offered friendship beyond the work context to those I felt able to but not offered to remain in a job that was no longer working for me. We spend a substantial amount of time at work so its important to ensure we are as happy as can be. All jobs do bring their challenges of course.

Ariela · 16/03/2025 18:01

Look at your holidays accrued and the number of bank holidays (Easter, May). Maybe look to include the bank holidays and your remaining annual leave and calculate to go including Easter? So, if April 18 and 21 are bank holidays, and if you get 20 days you accrue 1.666 days annual leave per month, then that's just over 6 days annual leave, then say you state you are giving 1 month's notice and your last working day is Mon 21 April if you give 1 month's notice on Friday 21 March. However you'll be on holiday/ bank holiday from 11th April onwards and Mon 21 is a bank holiday. If you do this, do put it in writing which will be your last working day. Or hand in 1 month's notice on Monday 24th, either way make sure you have it in writing from your new employers before handing in your notice.

CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 18:06

middleeasternpromise · 16/03/2025 17:58

I recently changed jobs at the same age as you, its been a wonderful opportunity to refresh my perspective on the world of work. I would try to focus on the positives, you have secured an offer that is better than what you have, those facts cannot be argued with. Unless there would be productive change, I would refrain from sharing a list of grievances, what would that achieve? People often know the reality of things even without you spelling it out, keep things professional. It is not your responsibility to improve things for your colleagues by staying they have to make their own choices as you have done. I have offered friendship beyond the work context to those I felt able to but not offered to remain in a job that was no longer working for me. We spend a substantial amount of time at work so its important to ensure we are as happy as can be. All jobs do bring their challenges of course.

That’s so lovely that you’ve had such a positive move, so pleased it’s worked out well for you.

I will keep it professional (even though it will be difficult) but there we go. I know I won’t be able to change things for my current work colleagues (wish I could). I will miss a couple of colleagues who really are dear to me but I can’t stay for them unfortunately.

I’m excited and nervous all rolled into one and I hope it is THE best move for me, as it can’t be much worse.

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CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 18:11

Ariela · 16/03/2025 18:01

Look at your holidays accrued and the number of bank holidays (Easter, May). Maybe look to include the bank holidays and your remaining annual leave and calculate to go including Easter? So, if April 18 and 21 are bank holidays, and if you get 20 days you accrue 1.666 days annual leave per month, then that's just over 6 days annual leave, then say you state you are giving 1 month's notice and your last working day is Mon 21 April if you give 1 month's notice on Friday 21 March. However you'll be on holiday/ bank holiday from 11th April onwards and Mon 21 is a bank holiday. If you do this, do put it in writing which will be your last working day. Or hand in 1 month's notice on Monday 24th, either way make sure you have it in writing from your new employers before handing in your notice.

I love this post but might have to read it more thoroughly later (or tomorrow as I’ve had a wine 🤣) but thank you for offering your advise re notice period. I will have a good read through with a clearer head.

I currently do get 25 days holiday per year plus BH, only due to longevity. No scope for more holidays though, public sector goes up to 31 holidays per year plus BH.

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MsMcGonagall · 16/03/2025 18:13

Just give notice as soon as all the confirmation comes through for the new job. The sooner you give notice the sooner you can leave and start the new job.

They will most likely want you to work the whole month, so you can hand over, but just in case, if there is anything you'd like a copy of (eg reports you wrote you are proud of) make sure you have it before you give notice.

I had to give notice (1 month) ASAP because the new job wanted me to start on a certain date. I had to insist on speaking to my line manager and when I got hold of her, her pet had died overnight. But I still HAD to tell her and make her day even shitter. So it can't be worse timing than that!

WellsAndThistles · 16/03/2025 18:14

Try and time it so your first day at the new job is the 1st of the month to max your annual leave as it's worked out on full months.

CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 18:17

WellsAndThistles · 16/03/2025 18:14

Try and time it so your first day at the new job is the 1st of the month to max your annual leave as it's worked out on full months.

Great point, thank you.

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CharlotteBakewell · 16/03/2025 18:24

Another positive is rather than a 40 mile round trip, it’ll be an 8 mile round trip.

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Samora · 17/03/2025 02:19

Once you have the new contract signed, then hand in your notice.

whatisforteamum · 17/03/2025 05:15

I always take a week off between jobs as a reset.
Good for you taking the leap.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 17/03/2025 06:25

WellsAndThistles · 16/03/2025 18:14

Try and time it so your first day at the new job is the 1st of the month to max your annual leave as it's worked out on full months.

That's not necessarily true
In the public sector organisation where I work, your leave year starts on the day you stay. So say you start on 18 October, and you have 28 days holiday, too have from 18/10/year 1 to 17/10/year 2 to take them.

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