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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flexible working question - not obliged to answer?

161 replies

Difficile · 14/03/2025 11:17

I'm looking to apply for flexible working. I know my request will get refused before I've even asked because I've been told it will, but I'd like to put the request in anyway just in case.

One of the questions on the form asks about how my request will impact my work and colleagues. According to ACAS (and the law) it is no longer required to answer this question, so AIBU to write just that in the section?

Something like "I am not obligated to answer this by law", just short and to the point?

OP posts:
Difficile · 14/03/2025 12:58

Louielooiloveyou · 14/03/2025 12:52

It doesn’t sound congruent with how your employers view holding on to you

perhaps you could volunteer back there to help your colleagues out (sorry couldn’t resist)

you've been there 17 years…I’d be sore about the non flexibility

They asked me to continue in a consultancy role, but I'd still have to work to the same work conditions. I could go back to the same company, area, team as a consultant but there's no scope to do so with the full flexible working terms I've asked for so it would be limited in comparison to the amount of work I do now.

OP posts:
travelwaffle · 14/03/2025 12:58

Even if I thought the business did have justified reason I would still fill in this box. OP could point out that she's a valued worker, has had consistently strong performance reviews, and will be hard to replace, which will have a detrimental impact on the team.

Filling in the box would take less time than OP is pending arguing about it on the thread.

There's no law that says the employer can't take this information into account OP.

longapple · 14/03/2025 12:59

what flexbility are you asking for?

Difficile · 14/03/2025 13:01

Throwntothewolves · 14/03/2025 12:55

OP it seems like there's more to this. For whatever reason you are pissed off at your employer and it seems don't want to work there anymore, but aren't prepared to just hand your notice in. It seems like your employer refusing your flexible working request is exactly what you want.
Did you ask informally expecting a yes, but got a no? Is that why you're being a bit arsey about the form and defeatist?

Do you want to give up work but your partner doesn't agree? Remember just because you can afford it on their wage doesn't mean all the burden should be on them.

It's a good idea to keep in mind that you've changed your life by having a child. You presumably still have the job you did before. Your employer is not obligated to adapt to your life choices. The right to request flexible working is not an entitlement to have flexible working. Too many people (mainly women) make that mistake.

Not pissed off, didn't expect a yes, and have a fully supportive partner.

Just wondered if we could all make work, work, and we probably can't. I was just going to formalise the answer before handing in my notice.

OP posts:
Difficile · 14/03/2025 13:01

travelwaffle · 14/03/2025 12:58

Even if I thought the business did have justified reason I would still fill in this box. OP could point out that she's a valued worker, has had consistently strong performance reviews, and will be hard to replace, which will have a detrimental impact on the team.

Filling in the box would take less time than OP is pending arguing about it on the thread.

There's no law that says the employer can't take this information into account OP.

That's fair. Thank you.

OP posts:
TheBlueRobin · 14/03/2025 13:04

In the effort you've gone to to write this post and reply to responses... you could have just answered the question on the form...

Bluevelvetsofa · 14/03/2025 13:04

What are the flexible terms you’re seeking?

Miaowzabella · 14/03/2025 13:05

If you don't answer the question, you are going to come across as either the sort of person who does not think through the possible implications of a course of action or the sort of person who does not give a damn about her work or her colleagues. Neither is likely to be helpful to your application.

TunnocksOrDeath · 14/03/2025 13:07

You might not have to answer it, but your manager will 100% be thinking about it anyway, because they have to manage the team as a whole. So if the answer is that it won't affect them negatively, then you'd be mad not to mention that. If you refuse to answer it, your manager might therefore assume it's because you think it will negatively affect your colleagues, but don't want to say so. Sometimes the strategic thing to do is play along.

User5274959 · 14/03/2025 13:07

Answer it if you can, but if you don't want to I would just leave it blank.

BooomShakeTheRoom · 14/03/2025 13:07

Difficile · 14/03/2025 11:36

I'm not obligated to think about that, it's up to my employer surely, hence the removal of the requirement in the laws relating to flexible work.

You sound like a difficult person. I manage a team and out of respect for the rest of the team, I know 100% my colleagues would all think about their team mates.

If anyone wrote “I’m not obliged to answer this”, it would tell me everything I need to know. That I’d do the minimum I had to legally, and I absolutely wouldn’t be looking for ways to make it work for them.

You get what you give in life.

Difficile · 14/03/2025 13:11

BooomShakeTheRoom · 14/03/2025 13:07

You sound like a difficult person. I manage a team and out of respect for the rest of the team, I know 100% my colleagues would all think about their team mates.

If anyone wrote “I’m not obliged to answer this”, it would tell me everything I need to know. That I’d do the minimum I had to legally, and I absolutely wouldn’t be looking for ways to make it work for them.

You get what you give in life.

Not being difficult to point out that legally the question shouldn't be on the form, surely?

I'm not difficult at all, in fact 99.99% of the time I go out of my way to help other people, but looking only at this form, I didn't think it would be necessary to complete a section that should no longer be there as the law has changed.

OP posts:
BooomShakeTheRoom · 14/03/2025 13:13

Difficile · 14/03/2025 12:52

But surely I cannot be treated any differently whether I fill it in or not. It's not a legal requirement, so it shouldn't make any difference.

You’re showing your naivety. Just because they technically shouldn’t ask that, doesn’t mean it won’t influence their decision.

Im wondering from your posts if you struggle to understand nuance? (genuine question, not trying to be unkind).

Jane958 · 14/03/2025 13:14

Please do not write "obligated"
Write "obliged" or no "obligation"

TorroFerney · 14/03/2025 13:14

longapple · 14/03/2025 11:41

you could even go really overboard and ask them why they don't think it will work, so you could address those concerns directly in your answer.

But they’ll have to tell her that when they refuse it.

AllThePotatoesAreSinging · 14/03/2025 13:14

araiwa · 14/03/2025 11:24

I am not obligated to give you flexible work then

Wrong. It’s no longer on the employee to persuade and you don’t need to give a reason. The current position is that It’s on the employer to give a genuine business reason to refuse, or which these are limited and specific. That’s the legal position.

@BooomShakeTheRoom take note.

OP just leave it blank. Rather than a reason you could give something about when team meetings take place and how it won’t interfere etc but you are under no obligation to do so.

If they refuse then appeal and send them the link to ACAS. I work in HR.

godmum56 · 14/03/2025 13:14

The one thing I would point out is employment karma. Giving bad references is much more difficult now but people do chat and give private opinions on people who they have employed. You will never prove it but think hard before you do something that could come back and bite you.

Bluenotgreen · 14/03/2025 13:16

If your reason for submitting a FWR is in any way related to a disability (you or dependents) then you can phrase it as a Reasonable Adjustment under the Equality Act 2010.

This won’t obligate your employer to accept the request, but it’s likely they will get an HR perspective.

Do whatever is needed to get it approved. You are coming across as wanting to cut off your nose to spite your face.

Sansan18 · 14/03/2025 13:17

Do you belong to a union and if so could you speak with them about this question being removed?
It seems foolish to proceed with an out of date form, how can your employer prove that they don't use this question in their decision making.
Perhaps the answer is to quote whatever the change in legislation etc has been as your answer.

LoveWine123 · 14/03/2025 13:17

You keep banging on and on about the question on the form and yet you have repeatedly ignored suggestions to get the question removed before filling out the form. It’s like you want to turn a non-required question into a problem. Are you hoping to use this as grounds for complaining later on?

Clarabell77 · 14/03/2025 13:19

araiwa · 14/03/2025 11:24

I am not obligated to give you flexible work then

They are obligated to consider the request and can only refuse it based on specific criteria.

That sounds like an old form they haven’t updated to reflect new legislation and guidance.

7inchesFromTheMiddaySun · 14/03/2025 13:20

You sound like a great team player - not. And now you don't need the money, you sound entitled too. Charming.

Difficile · 14/03/2025 13:20

LoveWine123 · 14/03/2025 13:17

You keep banging on and on about the question on the form and yet you have repeatedly ignored suggestions to get the question removed before filling out the form. It’s like you want to turn a non-required question into a problem. Are you hoping to use this as grounds for complaining later on?

Edited

I haven't ignored it at all, I think that's an excellent decision and I will certainly ask them to do so.

OP posts:
Difficile · 14/03/2025 13:21

7inchesFromTheMiddaySun · 14/03/2025 13:20

You sound like a great team player - not. And now you don't need the money, you sound entitled too. Charming.

I'm entitled for stating a fact? 😂

OP posts:
LoveWine123 · 14/03/2025 13:24

Difficile · 14/03/2025 13:20

I haven't ignored it at all, I think that's an excellent decision and I will certainly ask them to do so.

If you thought it was an excellent suggestion you would not have continued to discuss how to answer the question. You sounds like you have a bone to pick with your employer.

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