To not get MIL anything for birthday after I didn’t get anything?

[fluffypeachpatch]

Just that really. If she didn’t get me something it’s reasonable to do the same back? Been with dh almost 20 years and always done presents so no idea why she suddenly stopped but I’m hoping to take advantage of it as cba to do it tbh.

So she's got you birthday gifts for 20 years, this year she didn't so you're suddenly deciding you're not getting her anything either? Yeah, that's petty. Likely she forgot, it's no big deal.

@Wakeywake she didn’t forget because she text me happy birthday? The advice on here is useful. I’m thinking this could be the start of no presents going forwards which works for me anyway. If dh wants to get her something obviously he can too.

Are you quite sure that she didn't send you anything?

Imagine how awkward it would be if she has sent something, and it's been delivered to a neighbour / stolen / lost, and she has been waiting for a thank you.

She is probably writing a post to put on MN titled "DIL didn't acknowledge birthday gift, should I say something?"

I can't believe women are still taking on this sexist wife work. I'm in my 60s and 38 years married - I have never been responsible for DHs family's gifts/cards, and likewise he's never been responsible for mine. I wonder how male same sex couples handle family gift buying, if it's so hard for men to cope with?

I did get a slightly miffed text from a friend once because I hadn't thanked them for some flowers. That was the first I'd heard about any flowers, because the florist left they outside my door while I was at work and they'd been stolen before I got home! So it might be worth your DH checking that she really didn't send anything before getting too upset. If he feels awkward having that chat with his own mum, then the family probably has bigger problems than birthday gifts.

My mil rarely buys me anything but I still get her something - I don't buy to receive. What my husband chooses to buy or not buy his mum doesn't matter to me, if he forgets then that's on him, I don't remind him because it's not my responsibility to. Saying that there is also nothing wrong with just sending a happy birthday text either, I doubt she's going to sit around wondering where her gift is.

I sort out something small from the children because I know my husband has not and I need them to see that I care about their grandmother but it is not from me.

She hasn't remembered my birthday for the last two years other than a passive aggressive card (last one was Sagittarius always has to be right)

I get my own back in small ways like buying the same gift for her and my father in laws partner 😎