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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Help me celebrate a gotcha moment

4 replies

Fstt1978 · 11/03/2025 12:51

I know this is childish - but there's a new colleague at work who is running everyone ragged with their performative being offended at everything. Don't get me wrong- my manager is to blame for following up every report - she should be sitting on things and waiting to see a pattern.

Recent things (not against me but against a couple of lovely long time colleagues of mine) include ...
"being singled out and highlighted in the staff room and their looks being commented on" (lovely colleague making a cafetiere of coffee asked if they would like a coffee, they responded very keenly and as if they were tired- lovely colleague said 'there you go, that will perk you up, you do look tired you poor thing, that will sort you out"

A different colleague was snapped at by the new colleague and said "Are you ok? you seem a little stressed?" She was reported as 'attempting to police the new colleagues tone'
There are about 4 other examples and the colleague has been here for less than 3 months.

In the staffroom, if we are discussing things, the new colleague will shut almost every conversation down as 'triggering' - a recent example of this is we were discussing 'Apple Cider Vinegar' off Netflix and they asked the whole staffroom to stop as they found cancer triggering, this was repeated with the Eastenders live episode (explosions are triggering) and a book a colleague was telling us about (The Woman who went to bed for a year) was triggering as their mum had depression. the whole staffroom will then have to go quiet.

Anyway- yesterday - the new colleague was talking about growing up poor - and to be honest, lots of it was absolute nonsense. I shook my head and said "Loads of us grew up poor, we know what you are talking about" I was snappy, I'll admit. Anyway, they reported me and I had to meet with my manager to discuss with the new colleague.- I did the meeting and I said I was glad we had the opportunity to meet as I had done my own pink form (that's what our reports are called) as I found the new colleague talking about poverty very triggering and it was not professional in the staff room as they didn't know my lived experience.
We agreed to withdraw both reports.
I know I am being very petty but I was so pleased with myself!!

OP posts:
WonkyDonkeyWonkeyDonkey · 11/03/2025 12:54

Pah haha! Well done you.

Trigger that!

Iamallowedtodisagreewithyou · 11/03/2025 13:00

Just wondering when you guys actually manage to get any work done?

Fstt1978 · 11/03/2025 13:03

Iamallowedtodisagreewithyou · 11/03/2025 13:00

Just wondering when you guys actually manage to get any work done?

we have normal breaks like other workplaces- it is only one colleague reporting

OP posts:
APATEKPHILLIPEWATCH · 11/03/2025 13:06

👏🏼 bravo OP! Do this on every topic from now on! This absolute melt will either leave or be pushed.

Your manager needs to tell her to wise up. How old is this colleague?

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