Brags about dc height/weight etc

[ProustianMadeleine]

I've never been able to understand. Why do people try to brag about their child's weight, height, shoe size?

I can maybe understand a newborn baby, "wow what a chunk, 10lb 6oz, well done you!"

But for example, BIL speaks about DNeice's height like its some sort of achievement for him! "Oh she's soooo tall for her age" "the tallest in the class" "dwarfs the other kids, even the boys!"
She's not freakishly tall as he seems to claim. She's 11 and a similar height to my 12 year old DD.
And who cares anyway? It's likely she'll average out and become one of the smaller children as she gets older because most boys will takeover in height with puberty.

We're also not a tall family in the slightest. DH, BIL and FIL are all under 5"11.

I also know someone who would brag about her 10 year old DD being in ladies size 12 clothes and having size 6 feet like she was so developed and mature.
She's now a very normal sized 15 year old.

I know we all think our children are great but I'll never understand this kind of crowing oneupmanship.

But she is sturdy @Wildflowers99 so are you suggesting she looks overweight from that pic? I'm not being snarky, genuinely interested to hear. It can be hard being tall as a woman, especially if the other women in your family were shorter. I'm already dreading all the comments my DD will get about her height as I had them all my childhood so trying my best to shield her from them 🙂

Many people do seem to view children being tall for their age as some some sort of achievement. Mine were always the opposite, but it meant they were always on the front row in class photos. I can always remember an elderly aunt of mine, who on seeing DD, then aged five, for the first time in a while immediately exclaimed: “oh, she’s going to be tall.” I didn’t say anything because DD was the smallest child in the school at that point and would be for another two years. As an adult, DD has also failed to live up to my aunt’s forecast, but, although smaller than average, she is a perfectly respectable 5’ 1” size 6-8 and takes size shoes. I think most girls would rather not tower above everyone else in any case. As for my sons, number one finished at around 5’ 5” and number two at 5’ 7”. Both take size 7 shoes. Does it matter? Not one jot.

Yes, it’s probably a sore spot for me as not only were both my sisters an average height but they are much conventionally better looking than me.

I don’t think 2 year olds can be overweight really as they’re still toddlers and expected to have that chub. I think it’s something to monitor at they get older though as a lot of kids at DD school have mums who talk a lot about them being solid/well built, but you should be able to see their ribs by 4ish once they’ve stretched out. They all get that letter from the weigh in but throw it in the bin

My 2 are huge and everyone asks me if they have grown or stopped growing now they are older.
Being both summer premature babies who were the tallest in the year they definitely suffered from people expecting them to behave an age sometimes 3-4 yrs older than they were. I even had to remind the teachers on more than one occasion that the youngest only turned the age on the 29th August and his best friend turned the next age 3 days later. He was still maturing but was not behind developmentally he was actually ahead for a 32 weeker!

*size 2 shoes.

I never felt it's bragging either. I've passed comment in conversation about it, I've certainly never heard anyone speak about their kid being tall as if it's a brag or boast. If anything the opposite from a girls mum in DS class!

Everyone on Mns has super tall dc 😆😆

YANBU, everyone’s child on here is ‘over the 99th centile’. What are the odds of that 😂 I’m tall and wish I wasn’t, it has few benefits as a woman. I would prefer to be 5’5/5’6.

I'm 5ft 9 & love it, wasn't tall in primary school though so never stood out.

Some people do seem to brag about it and exaggerate too.
I've been told more than once about MILs Hairdressers 13yo 6ft 5 DS.

You know this kid as well as I do. But I don't actually believe any child could possibly be 6ft 5 at 13 yo and even if they were would you not be very worried about what height they will eventually turn out to be?

6ft 5 is into specialist clothing ranges, and probably flippers for feet and issues getting shoes.

It really doesn't help my own 13yo is on the short side, all good things come in small packaged. So someone braging really doesn't help

I have a very tall DC1 and tbh I've always found it somewhat of an inconvenience. They're assumed to be much older than they are and more is expected behaviourally, including some things they've just not been developmentally ready for or which are unfair - e.g. handing over a toy to a 'younger'-looking child, who was in fact a year old, because 'they're so little and they want it'.

My DC2 is on the smaller side and it has been somewhat of a revelation to me how much easier and more forgiving people are regarding smaller, cuter children. While DC1 would sometimes get evil looks for even tripping up or running around a smaller child, DC2 can literally push or batter a bigger child and the other parent often doesn't bat an eyelid or blames their own child for DC2's misdeeds 😂.

It is really, really strange and not particularly good for either child.

I have a friend who talks about her child’s weight / height / looks / percentiles etc… I know what weight DS was when he was born, and I have never thought about any of it (unless a the public health nurse comments) a single day of his four years.

One of the (rather irritating) school mums posts photos of her DD 13 in a bikini saying 'wow figure to die for'

How embarrassing, what a strange thing for that woman to post about her own child @Turkeypie

This thread has reminded me about the main culprit I know who talks about her tall DS more or less every time I see her. Never relevant to the conversation, just shoe horned in. Last time she was talking about tracking his height projection in his red book!! The kid is 15, clearly doesn’t need his height monitoring or his mum boring on about it every day.

So dull, and actually if she’s not talking about his height it’s his sporting prowess- he’s all round good not the next Messi. I try and avoid.

Being the shortest you know isn’t really relevant – it’s literally the UK average for men.

Ah, we have one of those on our class WhatsApp.

Along with plenty of posts of 'my ride and die 🥰' and 'bff's forever 😍' and lots of selfies of them doing matching trout pouts. I think the kid is 12 so not even a teen yet.

I'm waiting for the day someone comments 'she's not your bff, she's your fucking child you melt' but unfortunately I'm not brave enough to do it myself.

I’ve noticed this too op. It’s odd.

My first was very small from birth and remains slightly built and petite height wise at almost 10.

I’m currently pregnant and apparently expecting an off the charts giant. I have to say I have some mixed feelings about that (and not just the birth aspect!), I’ve always thought children who are big for their age have a harder time just being little children. I have a cousin who was always big for her age, some 12 years younger than me, so I remember that my aunt used to get so upset about comments made about her when she was little “why can’t she behave herself” etc because people thought she was about 6, rather than only 3 and so on.

My son is tall, his friends are all tall (around 6ft) and in a couple of cases very tall as in knocking their heads on my door frame, they're 18 so tomt know whether that is it growth wise, I actually do think it's good diet and living circumstances, I would say a majority of girls at my DD's secondary school are slim to skinny not overweight so I do think there are culture pressures and is not unlikely at all as we live in one of the healthiest cities in the country!

My point is I don't think it is a brag about height it's a fact and when my DC were little I felt the opposite pressure for them not to be stocky as that implied they were being fed crap. Of course that is crap but people definitely didn't brag about having stocky children in my geographical area!

I know people who talk about how small their children are so I don't think it's bragging I think it's just making conversation by commenting on what they have observed.

I don't know if it's really bragging? I think it's often more sharing their surprise at how quickly DC grow up.

I definitely have never experienced this, but my assumption is that it’s coming from a place of insecurity. For example, a family of men 5’11 and under, well, they are on the shorter side, and perhaps have become a bit obsessed with reversing that trend in their children.

Dh and I are tall. Our dc were short to average height when little, which was remarkable only because it was a bit odd, because we are so tall. I suspect they are taller than average now, but I couldn’t even tell you because I don’t even know how tall they are and have never really thought about it and how they compare to their peers. Similarly, don’t know how much they weigh and could just about guess at shoe size. But I suspect that’s because it’s not a hang up for me.

I don't brag about my DC's size, I rarely mention it in RL. However, I am amazed that 5'2 me produced 5'10 DD1. It blows my mind.

DD2 is 5'1 and that makes sense to me. DD1 being 5'10 and towering above us just makes me think "what the hell?!"

It starts with the ridiculous red book which is out of date, data wise, and HV's who do not understand the statistical difference between 50th centile and average.

What is the difference, because I would have assumed 50th centile was exactly average?

50th centile means half above and half below.
Average is the sum of all measurements divided by the total number.

The same answer does not necessarily arise.