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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

New job feeling, two years on

4 replies

mrspotty23 · 09/03/2025 14:21

I've been in my 'new' job 2 years now but still don't feel part of the team. There seems to be a lot that goes on both within work and gossip wise that I don't know about. I'm part time which probably doesn't help but there are two other part timers who have been there longer and seem to be a lot more involved.

The team are nice enough people and I get invited on work socials and things like that but inevitably end up coming home feeling rubbish because I feel like a spare part. There are some big characters and definite 'favourites' within the team who are clearly all loved and thought very highly of.

In work there are a lot of 'meetings' that I'm not part of that take place behind closed doors. I just feel unimportant. I was thinking of the task in traitors where they had to vote for the most irrelevant person and if that was within my work it would definitely be me!

I've told myself it doesn't matter, I'm there to do a job and all of this is just silly playground popularity shit that shouldn't matter. I guess I'm wondering if I just stop going out with them socially and protect myself or if that will make me feel worse.

In my old job I was firmly part of the team and had some close friends. It's just not like that here and as much as I expected it to begin with, two years on it just makes me feel rubbish. Have to reiterate they are not unpleasant people, they are actually really nice! Maybe it's me who just doesn't fit in.

OP posts:
mrspotty23 · 09/03/2025 17:06

Bump

OP posts:
mrspotty23 · 09/03/2025 22:56

Oh god I'm irrelevant here too 😂

OP posts:
Silvertulips · 09/03/2025 22:59

Oh dear! I think we all know how you feel and there are probably others that feel the same. In my old job a night out was overshadowed by 2 besties who’d rock up drunk, lead role way in the bars and end up doing the same crap Karaoke (gold anyone?) So yeah - I stopped going a not worth feeling shit inside and outside work.

Joystir59 · 10/03/2025 05:04

Perhaps time to consider changing jobs? Perhaps there's a bit of an unfriendly culture where you work now.

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