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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Weddings you went to where things went wrong?

764 replies

Bupo · 09/03/2025 12:01

Please can you share any times you attended a wedding where things went awry. I’m just keen to avoid any possible issue.

The only one I can think of is where the bride was two hours late. Apparently her family were just really exacting with the make up artist and had a lot of the make up redone/touched up.

We were sat in the Church for aaaaages. It meant that the drinks reception/evening meal was really rushed as the bride and groom really prioritised the dancing.

OP posts:
KimberleyClark · 10/03/2025 10:31

EmpressOfTheThread · 09/03/2025 12:41

I went to the wedding of a friend whose father had died a couple of years previously, so her BIL gave her away and made the speech. However, his speech spoke of the late father and him missing the day and seeing his daughter wed. This set the bride and her mother off, they couldn't stop crying. It was awful.

It would have been weird if he hadn’t mentioned the late father too though.

Hoppinggreen · 10/03/2025 11:02

I went to one where the couple had decided to get one of those "comedy" acts where they pretend to be waiters and are really rude and F everything up.
One was awful to a woman on our table and made her cry so her H hit him, there were many similar incidents
No idea why anyone thought it would be in any way funny

DazzlingCuckoos · 10/03/2025 11:13

Three weddings spring to mind - nothing too bad though.

Went to the wedding of a friend who was over an hour late. Apparently she hated her wedding hair once it was done, despite having had a trial only a couple of days before. She had really long, thick hair down to her waist and it had been styled into a very complex updo, so took an absolute age to take back out again and straighten it. We were all so confused when she came in with her every day hair style, but I very much think it ended up as a "if we don't leave now, they're not going to wait any longer".

The other one was my uncle's wedding in a church, where the vicar clearly thought himself quite the comedian and spent quite a lot of time telling really bad husband and wife jokes!

Then during the video of the service, you can see me and my Mum having an absolute giggling fit at her atrocious singing.

That marriage didn't last, so hopefully that video has been subsequently burned or binned!

Finally, my best friend's wedding where her Dad was so drunk by the time of the speeches no-one understood a word he was saying, but he thought he was hilarious at least!

MissMarplesNiece · 10/03/2025 11:21

Hoppinggreen · 10/03/2025 11:02

I went to one where the couple had decided to get one of those "comedy" acts where they pretend to be waiters and are really rude and F everything up.
One was awful to a woman on our table and made her cry so her H hit him, there were many similar incidents
No idea why anyone thought it would be in any way funny

It's similar to the wedding reception I was at where the bride & groom had hired a "comedian" who went round the tables making personal remarks & insulting people. The bride and groom thought it was hilarious but most people were just very uncomfortable with it. Why the heck would you want to humiliate your guests?

Yalta · 10/03/2025 11:28

I have known 3 marriages that didn’t survive the honeymoon (one didn’t survive the reception) and all 3 had one thing in common, in the run up to the big day and on the day a lot of friends from different friendship groups telling one of the parties to not go through with the wedding

Please Listen to your friends and save yourself the heartache and expense of a divorce / annulment

Nothatgingerpirate · 10/03/2025 11:47

Oh...
My own...🙃

Tinseltuttifruitti · 10/03/2025 11:54

I'll never forget the trilingual wedding, where every word of the ceremony and speeches had to be given in English, French and Norwegian. Good to be inclusive but it was just so boring. I've never been to a wedding with a worthwhile speech tbh including my own.

Rantypanties · 10/03/2025 12:26

I don’t have anything really dramatic to add but I remember a friends wedding in London that didn’t cater for the evening guests so the friends that joined us later (1.5hr journey & hotel room) had no food at all. Weirdly in a part of London that wasn’t surrounded by restaurants so had to wait till we got to our hotel to eat. I think that’s the main takeaway from the thread- have loads of food!

My wedding was pretty uneventful but my FIL did get up to make a speech welcoming my young sister to the family….!

villanova · 10/03/2025 12:33

Mine wasn't something that can be avoided/ planned for, but I accidentally ruined my uncle's wedding. I was 7 or 8yrs old, my dad was best man for his brother's wedding. Just before the ceremony, I accidentally stuck my finger in my dad's eye (can't remember how it happened). He struggled through the ceremony, but immediately after photographs had to be taken to A&E as his eye was red and streaming. This being the 1970, he did at least make it back to the reception before it ended, with a big gauze taped across his eye, but no best man's speech that day!

DaisyStarburst · 10/03/2025 13:13

Vegetarian and pregnant, the B & G knew both those things. There was no food for me. Plenty of food for everyone else but everything was meat, even the salads had meat in them. I asked the caterers if they had anything I could eat, even a piece of cheese would be something, they said no it had all been bought in as it was. We had to leave and find a chippy.

SpikyCoconut · 10/03/2025 13:22

I've never been to any where anything especially bad happened but I did go to one where the bride confided in me at reception that her and groom 'weren't good' and would soon split up but she had wanted some stability for her daughter (not groom's) so they had to get married. They'd parted ways within a few weeks.

As others have already stressed, HAVE ENOUGH FOOD. And not at silly times i.e no skimpy canapes at 12:00 and then nothing until 17:00 with everybody getting sloshed. Your guests are just that, guests -they've paid, travelled and bought presents-look after them.

If you don't have the money for a lush lavish do, don't have one-nobody will care as long as they're fed and warm/cool with somewhere to sit and they're not cold, hungry or

One of the nicest weddings I went to was also the simplest. Registry office, BYOB and some 'potluck'? I think they called it-for food.

It wasn't even that the couple didn't have money, they could have afforded a 'nicer' do but they just didn't see the point on spending on unnecessaries, which was more than fair enough. We all had a really good time, more than enough grub and then to a basic hall with a friend DJing for a disco/party. Can't have cost much at all and all I remember is having a really good time with lots of friends.

melonalone · 10/03/2025 14:00

ImAMinion · 09/03/2025 16:03

Mines unfortunately another catering one! They couldn’t afford it, simple as.

Winter wedding (December) and a flipping cold one at that! It was below zero degrees.

Service was at 10am at their church. I don’t know why it needed to be so early, but it was. After ceremony, it was pointed out that the reception location was not open for guests until 1pm. It was now just after 11am.
So into the church hall and found jugs of squash and a few plates of biscuits for over a hundred people. And that disappeared quickly. Thankfully, some church guests who were also church regulars switched on the hot water and got out the tea and coffee, someone discreetly went out for more milk and biscuits but Bride was a bit questioning and said “oh I just didn’t think people wanted tea and coffee at a wedding, why have we switched on the urn?” Thankfully she accepted that it was colder than she had anticipated as an answer but it was odd.

Arrive 2 hours later at venue - a very beautiful place that costs a fortune. A popular venue. Off they go for photos. At the venue……no canapés, no drinks. Just a few bowls filled with those tiny bags of Haribo sweets, and we were told the reception wouldn’t begin till 4pm. Someone enquired about the bar and we were told that B&G had not booked for that to be open till 4 so no staff to run it. Isolated venue, no shop or cafe or anything nearby. Thankfully they at least brought out jugs of water (and paper cups because again, refreshments had not been booked or paid for).

B&G and their quite big but close family who were in the photos were completely oblivious to the bored, starving freezing guests when they returned and it was only then that a few more snacks (think crisps and party rings) were brought out.

Into the reception finally, 12 tables plus top table. Food was a buffet, Top Table were first (food was dished out by the staff at venue I should say) - food ran out by table 6. 50% of guests (including myself) were left with nothing. Staff said they served what was paid for. Pudding was purchased separately - ie supermarket desserts, The MOB was a lovely lady doing the rounds and got to our table and wondered why we had no food and realised the issue. She quietly said she had been worried, they wanted this venue but In reality just didn’t have the budget, she was looking so sad at her daughter knowing bride would genuinely be upset if she realised and asked us to keep quiet and she would try and solve it. In the meantime, she approached MC and was having a quiet chat.

When desserts were set out, most of us at the 6 food deprived tables could see that there was a pitiful amount and nowhere near enough. The MC announced that Top Table would again go first, and that they would then go in reverse and used a sweet toothed uncle famous for his cake baking as the reason why they would start at the other end. Good old MOB. However, the first few tables were largely filled with family including a lot of children and the Bride called out that, as she had chosen lots of specificity things for certain people, could all the children and cousins get their pudding after them and then go through the tables. Well you can guess the result! Same 6 tables basically ended up with nothing.

Nothing from bar was included and evening buffet was also absolute minimum. Lots of guests were leaving by 8pm and, myself included, did spot bride getting a bit upset that so many people were departing so early.

This couple are a lovely couple but the reality was they couldn’t afford that location. They really couldn’t, they don’t have the funds at all. They could have had just as beautiful a wedding in a cheaper location - where everyone would be fed. The final carriages were at midnight, a 14 hour party and with Haribo, digestives, a few bags of crisps, a buffet for 60 out of 120 odd guests and dessert for less than that……I could never get the logic.

People like this drive me nuts!! The bride had an absolute cheek to get upset! I would have been out the door at the sight of the haribo! I think it is utter disrespect to treat your guests in such a way. You said they’re a lovely couple but lovely people just don’t treat guests with this level of contempt. Hope you took your wedding gift home with you!

IButtleSir · 10/03/2025 15:02

I went to a VERY expensive wedding where two drunken uncles got into a fight and the police had to be called.

AnonymousBleep · 10/03/2025 15:27

Marriage abroad (Italy) where the bride and groom hadn't submitted the correct paperwork beforehand so were not actually married after the ceremony! Had to go to a registry office and do it again once they were in the UK.

mullyluo · 10/03/2025 15:29

I went to one where none of the bridesmaids turned up, we weren't told why but someone stepped in last minute to act as bridesmaid. The bride was clearly very upset.

AndyH1985 · 10/03/2025 15:30

Tbh no amount of pre planning will avoid issues as no matter what you do it will never please everyone, the only thing that matters is that the wedding is about the bride and groom and its what makes you happy.

CoffeeAndChoccies · 10/03/2025 15:33

Sooo at my wedding my side of the family and bridal party had booked to stay in a hotel down the road the night before. Hotel was weird to say the least. No other guests there apart from my wedding party, barely any staff, service so sporadic, evening food was awful and they forgot about breakfast the next morning until my mum went down and had a word and they rustled up some bacon sandwiches! When guests got back the evening after the wedding, so like 12-1am, all their room key cards had been deactivated so they were locked out, and there wasn’t a single member of staff to be found - but everything had been left open, even the tills and a safe apparently! My auntie was in the kitchen, offices, back rooms etc trying to find someone. Eventually found a cleaner who worked nights and they were able to call someone so people could actually get in their room, but it took hours to sort. We found out later it went into administration a few weeks later so that explained why everything to chaotic. Meanwhile my DH was disgruntled because his hotel hadn’t given him the biggest suite! 😂

Oh, and we had a mini seating plan for family and bridesmaids/groomsmen in the ceremony room - the front 2 seating rows - as we’d rehearsed the entry/exit of the bridesmaids and groomsmen, so they were sat on aisle ends opposite each other etc. My MIL (didn’t know it was her at the time) went round just before the ceremony and moved all the names we’d put on the seats around because she felt the sides needed evening out (we didn’t have sides!) and she wanted a better view - she’d even seen the seating plan beforehand and hadn’t said anything! When it came to exiting the ceremony it was a big jumble and crush of bridesmaids and groomsmen and then eventually guests just following us out in a crowd 🙈. It looks a mess on the video.

However, we still had such a lovely day and even though little things didn’t go to plan it really didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. I don’t look back and get bothered about them - we even laugh about the hotel now!

TallulahBetty · 10/03/2025 15:50

Best Man got very drunk and was heckled (including by his own mother) during the speech. He ran out and the bride & groom didn't speak to him for years.

9fthighfence · 10/03/2025 15:55

Went to a wedding where they was an extensive family punch up. Excellent entertainment! Beats a string quartet easily.

Jaq27 · 10/03/2025 16:11

At our wedding in London our guests brought gifts and they were all piled on a table at the reception ... at some point many were stolen.
As they were all wrapped we had no idea what went missing so we had to ask guests what they had given and guess how many had been taken and estimate the ££cost. Really embarrassing and awful. The hotel was very apologetic and gave us some compensation. (But then they also forgot our breakfast in bed in the morning ...)
At my friend's wedding (he was the groom) his mother died on the morning of their marriage day. She had been very ill with cancer. Wedding went ahead but was obviously subdued.
Best friend's wedding her much adored father died three weeks before the big day ... so sad. She chose her beloved uncle to give her away instead, and he died 2 days before the wedding day. Really tragic for her.

tallhotpinkflamingo · 10/03/2025 16:16

thunder and lightning started at the same time as the service, luckily it was indoor but still creepy.

photographer lost all the photos

AssCeiling · 10/03/2025 16:21

Tight wad bride and groom massively under-catered the evening do.

So, a random uncle of the groom ordered about 50 Dominoes pizzas to be delivered. He was very popular - lots of drinks, lots of thanks, a whip-round.

Bride was distraught that this random uncle had shamed her for under-catering and was getting too much attention.

So her dad punched random uncle in the face breaking his jaw bone and giving him mild concussion.

Genevieva · 10/03/2025 16:26
  1. Old university friend's very small wedding. Undoubtedly the most expensive I have ever been to by some margin. Her father mentioned her and her new husband once in his speech, then spent a good 20 minutes waxing lyrical about how marvellous her single younger sister is. It was a very -in-your-face attempt at getting one of the well heeled young men in the room to hitch up with her. She was so embarrassed.
  2. An old primary school friend who married a keen rugby player. His best man's speech came complete with projector and slideshow of all his most embarrassing moments, including full nudity, in front of everyone including the bride and groom's grandparents. We sat there in stunned silence wondering when someone would step in and tell him enough was enough.
Nonrienderien · 10/03/2025 16:29

Another one. My parents were at my cousins wedding,both of the grooms parents areTechers & they expected a degree of decorum We couldn't manage but on reflection all we missed was a big brawl amongs the grooms friends towards the end of the reception. My father told me there was food flying & eventually the police were called & they managed to end it. Excessive alcohol &;weddings are not a great mixture especially when it's on the house.

Rocknrollstar · 10/03/2025 16:33

Make sure there are enough loosing at the venue. Then make sure they are well supplied with toilet paper and paper towels.
I was at one where no one mentioned the bride and how beautiful she looked. The band leader had to do it.
Also was at one where the groom snogged the bridesmaid on the stairs.

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