To wish people would give my and my wheelchair more room?

[WinterBones]

I was out in my wheelchair today, had to join a couple of queues at the pharmacy and so on.. so i wheeled up to the counter, then had to leave.. which required a slight reverse before i could spin the chair ( it's hand propelled not an electric one).. both times i nearly squashed the toes of the person behind me.. who had got so close the could have been holding my handles.

It's like having someone breathing down your neck then getting pissed when you accidentally step back on their toes.

I know its likely they don't think, or don't realise.. so for everyone not familiar.. please leave us space, those things can spin pretty well, but often we need room to turn, which sometimes means a slight backwheel to give us space to turn.

Yanbu.

I'd love to know why anyone thinks its unreasonable?

YANBU. I'm not a wheelchair user but I've noticed a sort of generalised lack of spatial awareness in people lately.

What makes it all the more surprising is that during covid everybody kept such a long distance away from each other.

I was walking along a crowded pavement today in my kind of small, hilly, popular with ramblers town and the woman in front of me suddenly stopped dead, tucked one of those German style hiking poles under one arm, backwards, so to speak, to bend over and do up her walking boot shoelace and nearly had my eye out.

Last week, some other clown decided to get a six pack of bottled Kronenbourg down from the highest shelf in the old supermarché by batting it down like a cat knocking things off a shelf and catching it. She missed. Beer and broken glass everywhere. The neck of one bottle flew past my face by an Act of God.

You have my deepest sympathy.

Totally NBU and suspect that’s mistaken voting!

People are such dickheads and thoughtless about considering disabilities

I had a row with a white van man yesterday who had blocked the pavement and there was no drop kerb so a wheelchair user wouldn’t have been able to get round him (and even with a dropped kerb it wouldn’t safe as busy road and he was obscuring oncoming traffic etc). It’s a busy area for people using the path and he was clearly going to be there all day (on a job).

He told me to go fuck myself when I suggested he move a bit to leave space for pushchairs and wheelchairs.

Same problem with mobility scooters, so I just run over their toes/ Nobody does it twice. No, just joking - I possibly would if they didn't move but reversing siren and a large service dog usually shifts everyone.

But the parking on pavements and dropped kerbs drives me bloody mad. I recently had enough of asking one particular place to PLEASE be more thoughtful and stop parking up on every pavement / across every dropped kerb, literally on a weekly basis and for SIX MONTHS. So I persuaded the council wardens to come and ticket the lot of them one day, which they were very pleased to do.

I bet they were all rather pissed off when the came out of CHURCH😂

Funnily enough they have suddenly become considerate parkers....

It’s all people know, they don’t know how to queue anymore without standing an inch away from you. Not going to get you to the front any quicker.

Oh, another one. There's an ATM by my flat where people just plough up on the pavement to jump out and "Use it quickly." Even allowing for French/Italian driving étiquette, pedestrians without the mobility of Usain Bolt could be strawberry jam.

This is the thing. We've gone from keeping quite a long distance from each other in queues a few years ago to back breathing down each others necks.

Especially in pharmacies because keeping a respectful distance is because you might be discussing something quite private.

I feel like there are more and more people just switching off in public places and not knowing how to act around others. Rise of smart phones and big headphones doesn't help.

There are times i'd love to just roll over their toes, but it would probably hurt them, i'm not the lightest, and nor is the chair, lol.

Might need an obnoxious fog horn instead!

yanbu.

ds is a wheelchair user it it drives me mad when people don’t show basic consideration. A young woman gave me a mouthful a few weeks back when she shoved her way so close in front of us I caught her heels. No thought for the fact the issue was her impatience

I just wanted to thank you for saying something. My daughter uses a wheelchair and she finds it incredibly stressful to go out on her own because of selfish pricks like this.

I still leave large gaps in queues, not as large as during covid, but certainly not as close to people as we did beforehand.

In a queue though, I don't expect someone standing in front of me to suddenly step back wards into me, same as I wouldn't expect a wheel chair or a scooter to suddenly reverse back into the queue without saying something. Do you say anything before you reverse, say excuse me as you back up etc?

Thank you for making me more aware that you need to do this though before taking off.

Honestly, if you ran over my toes in that situation I'd be very apologetic and feel it was my fault for being too close.

It's their fault. Next time stop on their toes and bounce.

I’m not in a wheelchair but when someone is that close to me I can feel them breathing on my neck I start sorting out my long ponytail and ‘accidentally’ flick them in the face 😂

I had one once who was so close their foot went under mine as I was walking. I stopped and put my foot down and trod on their toes…they tutted until I pointed out they may have been slightly too close

I leave space regardless of who is in front of me - there’s no need to be that close!

A few years ago I was walking home with baby dd in the pram. We're rural, so although there's now a pavement of sorts the traffic is going at 40 (well, those sticking to the limit are). Just in front of me a large lorry pulled in to a driveway to make a delivery. He could have gone further up but chose to park across the pavement. When I stopped he told me just to walk around on the road. Problem was we were at the top of a hill and the road immediately bent to the right. If a car had come round at any speed I wouldn't have had a chance and not would my dd. I waited.

OP I am not a wheelchair user but I have used double crutches for a long time, so I am need a bit more space. I'm also a little slower, a little more hesitant in moving around . My crutches are obvious but you'd think they are invisible. I used to commute and my particular favourite was the beefy middle aged man who shoved on the train every day as I tried to exit. I'm not a confrontational person but in the end I stood in the door and bellowed 'move!' : nothing - he barged on, same as before. I'm sorry you have to put up with this x

I hate it when people get right up my arse in a queue. Drives me mad. YANBU.

In a normal queue it wouldn't necessarily be something you'd have to do... but if i've wheeled up close to the counter in a pharmacy as i've had to sign the back of the prescription, i'd genuinely be surprised that it wouldn't occur to you that to turn a chair in that tight a space, you'd need to back up from the counter a bit.

Chairs have a fairly tight turning circle, but to physically turn where i'm up at the counter would foul the front small wheels or potentially my knees against the counter front. it'd be similar to if you'd pushed a buggy right up and had to pull back before turning.

god i feel you, i'm usually on double crutches if i'm not in the chair and the amount of people i have to ask to move to make space for me or they nearly trip over them is annoying as hell!

YANBU! I push DM in a chair and the number of people who cut in front of her is beyond belief. Every time I have to jerk her to a stop to avoid smacking into someone, hurts her, and kills my shoulders. Or just try to 'squeeze past' so close I have to stop or their feet would get caught under the wheels.

YANBU.

Last week I was in a queue in a cafe and ended up holding my empty tray stuck out behind me to ward off a bloke with horrendous breath who kept trying to stand so close that he was actually touching me whenever he turned to talk to his companion.

It seems every queue I'm lately in I end up doing a ministry of funny walks position to try to enforce some personal space.

I'm not a wheelchair user, and I'd imagine it's much worse for you if my experience of using one following surgery a few years ago is anything to go by - just flat out ignored by the majority of people, even when I was actually speaking to them!

Some people really shouldn't be allowed out in public.

I've noticed this when taking my bike on trains. People want you to move out of their way, but don't allow you any room for manoeuvre in order to do so.

OP - YANBU. At all.

I have been on crutches for years and am not the most stable of walkers.

During covid it was easy as everyone crossed over the road to avoid other people and they gave me a wide berth but nowadays I quietly seethe at the elderly and people with prams and push chairs. I wait patiently at the side of the pavement while they dawdle, stop to check their phone etc and then don't say thanks for my getting out of their way and waiting for them to pass.

Oddly, teenage kids are the politest age group and best at avoidance.However, they are most inclined to want to manhandle me across the road - they seem to think that anyone disabled MUST want to cross the road and must be helped or manhandled whether they want help or not.....

Shopping is another bug bear - that's why if I can't buy online I don't bother. The people with trolleys that stop dead or veer off is unbelievable. I am coming to the view that shops should offer trolley training and only allow those that pass the training to have a trolley licence ....

Rant over !

My first husband was a wheelchair user, and I can tell you, life is far too short to be polite to assholes. Run over toes if you need to, scratch the cars slightly if they didn't leave enough room for you to get past easily.

Take up the space you need and are entitled to in the world, and don't make yourself smaller for any of them.