Childminder mat leave

[ariacoops]

Posting anon because in case my childminder is looking for advice online. My son goes to a wonderful childminder we’ve been very happy with. She’s pregnant with her first baby and says she isn’t planning to close at all apart from while she is in hospital. She hopes her assistant - who seems a bit hopeless tbh - to cover everything during this time but seems to think she can just keep going. The other kids are either part time at nursery or term time only, so because of the timing it’s only our DS who will be there solo for a lot of the early weeks. I have to say I feel uneasy, I just don’t believe he will get the same standard of care when she has just had her first baby. She also keeps talking about potentially sending him and her asssistant to back-up childminder friends that she knows, on a day to day basis depending on how she is feeling. But I don’t know these people and I have told her I’m not happy with that. I really wish she would just take a set period off and recover and we could find an alternative but she says it’s not financially viable and seems to believe she can just struggle through and doesn’t believe she’ll be sleep deprived etc. I might be overthinking it tbh but it’s hard to say directly to someone that I don’t think they are making the right decision. And I have to think if my little one would be really getting the same standard of care there - I know with my eldest when I had the second baby my eldest def did not get my full attention! Any advice?? Anyone experienced this before? And AIBU to just tell her I’m not happy with this?

You don't need to tell her you don't agree with her personal decision, it's up to her whether she carries on working. It's likely financial reasons which you're not privy to.

If you don't wish to continue to send your son then just give the appropriate contractual notice and seek new childcare.

I would just find an alternative and give her notice. There isn’t really an alternative, you can’t send your child to childcare you aren’t happy with.

I guess I’m trying to avoid the scenario where we just leave entirely, because my son is happy there and I would leave a pregnant woman suddenly with much less income and a space to fill which will be v difficult for her. And part of me thinks maybe he would be fine with the baby there but the fact she hasn’t planned anything does make me worry.

Looking after a baby and a toddler is HARD. Most mums of two say that their big one is a bit neglected/ watches too much CBeebies when the little one is new (mine certainly was). There's no way I would send him there if you have other options.

I would find alternative childcare to be honest; I think she’s being very hopeful and unrealistic. If she realises it’s not working then you may get little notice of her closing. When your DS is settled somewhere else chances are you won’t want to move him back anyway

I'm a childminder and I took just 2 weeks off with one of my children.
BUT, it wasn't my first baby; I had to be up and about looking after my toddler anyway and the other little boy was his best friend and they l loved each others company.
I know that OFSTED would have a lot of words if you take no maternity leave at all ( in fact, isn't there a legal thing you have to take 2 weeks off?)
She has no way to know how she's going to be feeling.
She may well be doubly incontinent for a week or so and will defintely be very very sleep deprived.

However, she does have an assistant so it boils down to how confident you are with the assistant having sole charge.

Legally, the assistant cannot decamp to another CM's for any more than 2 hours at a time without the CM being there with her

Personally, I think she hasn't thought this through and my advice would be o tell her you're going to find alternative childcare for x weeks ( if you can)

But even if she took a proper maternity leave, your son would still have to adjust and settle somewhere else for a while.

If she genuinely believes she can provide a good standard of early years education within days of giving birth then her standard can’t be very high.

I agree I’d feel v differently if it wasn’t her first baby because then you aren’t naive about how it is! I barely knew my own name for about six weeks after my first…

Sorry, I agree I would find alternative childcare if possible. I'm very pregnant and struggling, toddler is not getting the best of me. I can see if thr assistant was very brilliant but you don't seem convinced on that and I would not be happy with toddler being placed with other childminders I dont know at short/ no notice.

I would write down your reservations, which are very reasonable, and then say you appreciate she has made a decision for her and her family but your have to do the same.

Yes I'd leave for alternative childcare too. Otherwise it's going to be chaotic, unfamiliar faces, and ad hoc visits other child minders. She may end uo with emergency c section and be in hospital for a few weeks. She isnt going to be able to have your child for 2 months at minimum. You could explain that it's only for 6 months/1 year until she's back on her feet, or keep him at the other place.

I'd say to her you want to find alternative childcare for the first 3/4 weeks as she has no way of knowing if she will cope/ be able to work and you need reliable childcare for your dc. If she refuses then you have to decide whether to give notice.

But your son is your number one priority. That’s the only thing you need to care about.

I would tell her what you've said here.

I wouldn't just leave, but I'd make it clear that you're not happy with this arrangement and ask her to re-think. If she won't then I'd start looking for alternative childcare.

If the assistant was very good then I'd think differently, but it won't work for you're not happy with them.