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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nuisance neighbour

69 replies

candaceswap · 07/03/2025 15:23

Since we have moved here there have been some issues with the neighbour.

Firstly she would reverse into our drive most days and her visitors would frequently park in our designated parking spaces.

We had to move the bins to stop this.

Now her living room window falls outside the parking spaces.
There is a bedding area under her window and today she came onto our property to start ripping out the plants.

We are unsure that this bedding area even belongs to her, I have had to call the HA to check - will call back as these are new builds.

Main principle is she shouldn't be coming onto our property at all.

I want to move my garden bow from the back and put it int front of her window to stop her coming onto the property.

We have never parked in her space, never even stepped foot on her property.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Original poster
candaceswap · 07/03/2025 20:54

My husband reckons the bedding area is 50/50 but she was on the other side towards me pulling out plants.

OP posts:
m00rfarm · 07/03/2025 20:55

You are missing very relevant "not" words in some places (or otherwise I am not sure what the problem is) - can you check what you write before you post it as it really makes little sense.

ParrotParty · 07/03/2025 20:59

Considering its under her house I would assume that flowerbed is hers. Regardless why does it matter if she stands on your driveway? She will have to to clean her window etc anyway.
Stop letting pettiness consume you and focus on things that matter.

MissEloiseBridgerton · 07/03/2025 21:07

Storm in a teacup, as long as she isn't looking in your windows or damaging the property, I cannot see an issue. I also can't really make head nor tail of your diagram

amyshep · 07/03/2025 21:11

Looks like your parking space is in front of her house imo...
odd setup

noctilucentcloud · 07/03/2025 21:16

Her visitors parking in your space/s is unreasonable. However her walking over your parking space to see to the flowerbed seems perfectly reasonable. Especially as the flowerbed is under her window and you might have joint responsibility for it. You have to live next door to her for probably a long time, don't start difficulties when you don't need to, let inconsequential stuff go. Honestly, in the grand scheme of what can go wrong with neighbours this is barely on the scale.

FatherFrosty · 07/03/2025 21:26

can you check the land registry? It might not be on there depending how new you are. You can check any property and it doesn’t cost a lot (I think it’s £7.50 now).
be quicker than waiting for HA

BeaAndBen · 07/03/2025 21:29

So she stood on the end of your drive to access the bedding plants under her window? That sounds a total non-event, really.

Her visitors shouldn’t park in your space. But that’s the only unreasonable bit.

Shatandfattered · 07/03/2025 21:33

For god sake. Someone tending to a bit of bedding and reversing, id rather that than a neighnout with a drug den weeds music etc. Its attitudes like this that inflame issues because it comes across as being the type to look for a problem.

Shatandfattered · 07/03/2025 21:34

*neighbours

Longtimelurkerfinallyposts · 07/03/2025 21:36

your diagram is incomplete.
it doesn't show any path leading to your door - do you have one? are you supposed to use the 'neighbour's path'?
where is your living room window? is there a garden bed outside it as well?
who is responsible for what may well be a shared/ communal flower bed - does the HA employ contractors to look after the grounds around the building?
it seems like the whole development hasn't been v well designed or thought out, and it's surprising that the HA didn't make these things clear when you all moved in.
have you ever been given a map showing the boundaries of 'your' property?
are you allowed to put in a short fence to mark this?

CaptainFuture · 07/03/2025 21:40

Firstly she would reverse into our drive most days and her visitors would frequently park in our designated parking spaces.

Do you have a driveway plus designated parking spaces?

It all sounds a bit bizarre, your parking space is in front of her house and hers is in front of yours?

deademptyduck · 07/03/2025 21:44

YABU - you are actually the nuisance neighbour in this scenario.

Original poster
candaceswap · 07/03/2025 21:44

I haven't got a path leading to my front door, the property is accessed via the car park.

My living room window is to the right of my front door and there is a bedding area under there as well which just covers my boundary.

I never use the neighbours footpath out of respect for her privacy.

I just tried to look on Land Registry and the information isn't available yet.

I think I'm just really annoyed because of her visitors parking on our driveway and at times they have looked straight through the window and at times waved, it impacts our privacy and I have had to put the bins at the front to stop this.

OP posts:
Original poster
candaceswap · 07/03/2025 21:45

We have designed parking spaces clearly marked and she would use hers as well as mine.

OP posts:
CaptainFuture · 07/03/2025 21:46
Car Chase Police GIF

Shit! They WAVE at you?!! Call the police!!

Original poster
candaceswap · 07/03/2025 21:46

@deademptyduck - I'm not really sure how or why considering I don't infringe on her or privacy or have people park in her parking space.

OP posts:
deademptyduck · 07/03/2025 21:51

candaceswap · 07/03/2025 21:46

@deademptyduck - I'm not really sure how or why considering I don't infringe on her or privacy or have people park in her parking space.

Because good neighbours don't get hung up on these things and are kind and flexible with each other. They speak in a friendly way to each other when something is an issue rather than moving bins and speaking to HA's. Why exactly are you so worried about someone turning a car on a bit of tarmac - how does it negatively affect your life? You say it's privacy but realistically they're not looking into your house as they do it. We had a neighbour like you - everyone else in the street was friendly and considerate and he was territory marking at every opportunity. It's a bizarre way to be and life is too short. Maybe get some more hobbies so you get less time to hyper fixate on the neighbours?

MooseBeTimeForSnow · 07/03/2025 21:51

I would suspect, if it is a HA property, that you don’t actually own the parking space. The HA will own it (and maintain it) and you just have a right to use it.

GretchenWienersHair · 07/03/2025 21:57

candaceswap · 07/03/2025 21:44

I haven't got a path leading to my front door, the property is accessed via the car park.

My living room window is to the right of my front door and there is a bedding area under there as well which just covers my boundary.

I never use the neighbours footpath out of respect for her privacy.

I just tried to look on Land Registry and the information isn't available yet.

I think I'm just really annoyed because of her visitors parking on our driveway and at times they have looked straight through the window and at times waved, it impacts our privacy and I have had to put the bins at the front to stop this.

I’m confused. Are they houses or flats?

Original poster
candaceswap · 07/03/2025 22:00

@deademptyduck - I hear what your saying and can see your point of view.

Ironically it is her that has fallen out with people round here, she has had heated words with her other neighbours parking in her parking space.

I definitely am not territorial, I take in parcels for neighbours, have sent Xmas cards, I always say hello and talk to neighbours.
I definitely want to get on with neighbours.

I never see this neighbour to approach the issue of her visitors parking in my parking space, and I wouldn't want to knock on her door either and cause confrontation.

I saw all this on the Ringdoor bell whilst I was out.

The parking spaces are allocated to each property as marked, this was in the email I received when I was "under consideration" for the property.

OP posts:
Original poster
candaceswap · 07/03/2025 22:01

These are newbuild terraced houses.

There are 6 on this side and 6 opposite, this is a cul de sac.

OP posts:
deademptyduck · 07/03/2025 22:03

candaceswap · 07/03/2025 22:00

@deademptyduck - I hear what your saying and can see your point of view.

Ironically it is her that has fallen out with people round here, she has had heated words with her other neighbours parking in her parking space.

I definitely am not territorial, I take in parcels for neighbours, have sent Xmas cards, I always say hello and talk to neighbours.
I definitely want to get on with neighbours.

I never see this neighbour to approach the issue of her visitors parking in my parking space, and I wouldn't want to knock on her door either and cause confrontation.

I saw all this on the Ringdoor bell whilst I was out.

The parking spaces are allocated to each property as marked, this was in the email I received when I was "under consideration" for the property.

Maybe I'm letting my experiences cloud my judgement - if so I apologise. In either case is it worth all the drama if she's argumentative and unlikely to listen anyway?

CaptainFuture · 07/03/2025 22:06

candaceswap · 07/03/2025 22:01

These are newbuild terraced houses.

There are 6 on this side and 6 opposite, this is a cul de sac.

Why is your parking space in front of her house then? Wheres hers? What's in front of yours?

Hoardasurass · 07/03/2025 22:09

@candaceswap you're coming across as the nuisance neighbour because of your ridiculous complaints.
She stepped on your parking space infront of her window and flowerbed to take out last years dead plants ready for spring planting in the next few weeks like most gardeners will be doing, you use emotive language to make her sound unreasonable and a bit nutty when in reality your parking space is her only point of access to the flowerbed. You complain about her reversing towards/onto your drive as if she's intentionally invading your privacy (nobodies interested with you enough to do that) and want to escalate things by putting your stinking bin right under her window on or blocking her flowerbed (not sure as you weren't very clear on that) as if that's a sane or rational thing instead of it being the nasty antagonist thing that it is.
The only potentially valid complaint that you could have is that her visitors occasionally park in one of your spaces with your full knowledge and tasit permission (as they wave and you say nothing).
Basically if you keep going on like this you risk a vaid complaint about YOU harassing your neighbour

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