To ask AIBU about my music choices?

[OtherCoraline]

I pretty much exclusively listen to The Smiths/Morrisey and Lana Del Rey with a tiny bit of Joy Division. Has been this way since I was a teenager. I have tried lots of different artists but to be honest, I've not really enjoyed any of them. Only exception would be a few of Lady Gaga's hits. My music taste has no reflection on my mood or mental state as I listen to it when I'm happy, sad and everything in between. I only have it out loud when I have a shower, otherwise it's just when I wear headphones.

My DH likes The Smiths (or did growing up) but has a very wide range of music taste. He gets annoyed that this is the only kind of music that I listen to as he thinks it must mean I'm depressed, even though I reassure him that I'm not. To reiterate, he'd only hear it if he was near the bathroom when I shower, I'm not playing it all day every day or anything. He says it's not good for me to listen to it so often. Would you feel the same way if your husband/partner only listened to quite maudlin stuff? I feel like I can't listen to it without having to defend myself now. AIBU?

This post is not an opportunity to say IABU because Morrisey is a prat (which I think he can be)

I think you should listen to whatever you want and tell him to bog off.
my only AIBU is that you’ve not got any Arctic Monkeys in there 😂

Oh and I liked Panic at the Disco as a teen but don't listen to them as an adult.

Maybe its him thats depressed 🤷‍♀️

As a die hard Smiths fan, even I couldn't listen to them continuously. Have you tried any Smiths adjacent bands, Modest Mouse maybe?

@Nellienooiloveyou I don't think that he is but he did say that he finds hearing it depressing.

@CleanShirt I haven't but it's approximately 5 minutes of my day once YouTube ads have past and YouTube goes on to random songs after the first one that I pick.

People claim the same about the Cure. I still listen to them, my opinion is there's a big difference between melancholy or depressing music. 😂
Their concerts are also the best ever, nothing of late can compare.

He shouldn't be getting annoyed at you for this. Enjoy your music, and tell him to get over it.

You’ve been listening to them since you were a teenager so surely what ever damage he’s worried about would have already been done.

Perhaps @Nellienooiloveyou is onto something. Maybe he finds those artists depressing. If you have a playlist, just add something like Agga Do or Barbie Girl at the end. That should perk him up again.

Weirdly controlling of him.

What I think is depressing is that people get stuck in the 80s and 90s and think they’re into cool music but they completely miss out the amazing music that’s being made right now. At least you’re listening to Lana Del Ray and Lady Gaga. He’s the one living entirely in the past.

You aren't being unreasonable, but you're not listening to any music influenced by other cultures, or any music made before 1984. I think, in order to really understand and appreciate music, you need to hear symphonies, the blues, funk, disco, reggae, west African drumming, hip hop, Balinese gamelan. But then I'm a music teacher so I would think this

Keep going as normal and if he says it again just turn to him and say right, is this really bothering you that much? How is it making you feel? I don’t have any issues with this but clearly it’s you with the problem? It’s getting to the point where I’m hesitant to listen to my own music in the shower and I’ve never felt any sort of way about it until you started complaining! You are making me uncomfortable in my own home. The end 😂x

I don't think it's reasonable for your partner to tell you what you should be doing regarding most things, what music you choose to listen to especially.

Neither dh nor I listen to music without headphones so neither of us have a clue what the other is listening to (we have the radio on in the car). I’d drive him insane with my mix of the Script, Benson Boone and Dua Lipa and I wouldn’t want to listen to his 90s house stuff. But I wouldn’t tell him that! I think your dh is out of order but if he’s having to listen to it a lot that would drive me mad too.

Oh dear. I'm still stuck in the 1960s and 1970s!