To not go to the wedding?

[Unsurelobster]

NC as this could be outing. A close friend who I have known for 15+ years is getting married this year. Not really seen too much of them since they moved away about 7 years ago. The wedding is around 2 hours away and no children allowed therefore would need to find childcare for 2 nights which is the first couple of inconviences. I would like to go however DC will still be young therefore not I’d rather not leave them with someone however I do feel as though I’m abliged to go as I don’t want to upset them. Friend hasn’t made an effort at all with me postpartum (they don’t have children themselves which could be why). I have already turned down the abroad hen do and wouldn’t want to ruin the friendship by not going to the wedding. AIBU?

edit to add also the current prices of hotel rooms nearby for 1 night is £200 but feels necessary to stay over because of the length of the drive and to be able to have a few drinks.

Two hours is one night or a day trip. Can your partner stay with the children while you attend the wedding? Skip the reception if you need to. That way you don't have to be away from the children but are still making the effort to be at the wedding ceremony itself.

You don't have to go though. I never went to weddings without my children, but then they all happened when I had a nursing newborn I couldn't leave for that long anyway, so I didn't feel there was a choice.

You're being a bit ridiculous, with flimsy excuses which says to me that you don't really want to go.
I used to commute 2 hours to work, I drove 90 mins each way for my car service yesterday. 2 hours is easily a day trip.
And assuming you have a dp, you can leave dp with the kids, saving on childcare.
If you feel it's to much hassle, I wouldn't give you're excuses, just sadly you can't make it and send a gift.

Wedding starts at 10 am so leave home at 7.15 am. Stay for ceremony and meal and then go. I'm assuming this isn't a church at 10 am. So go but leave later in the day. If you don't value the"friend", don't go. I can see why a long day isn't suitable for dc. Have a day out if you wish though and there's people there you know.

A 10 am wedding makes for a very long day. I would be peopled out by mid afternoon.

If you want to go I'd bite the bullet and go to the wedding on my own and attend the wedding breakfast then drive home afterwards. The bride probably won't notice if you are at the evening do. After a 10am start most of the guests will be flagging anyway by then.

I was thinking this.

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