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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DS punished for teachers mistake

208 replies

babynot · 06/03/2025 16:54

DS's(8) class were given a new work book at school last week with with printed labels on the front.
Imagine his name is something like Tommy but this book said Tom which he is never called and hates.

He told the teacher his name was wrong on the label and was told not to worry about it, he didnt ask and so wasn't told not to correct it but decided to scribble out ‘Tom’ and write ‘Tommy’ below. It looks fine, obviously not as neat as it would printed but you can clearly read what it says.

Teacher has left a note saying he needs to rewrite his work into a new book which has been sent home because he vandalised the first one. Its only a few pages of work but will take him at least 20 minutes to do

AIBU to think this is unfair and it’s not his fault they put the wrong name?

OP posts:
TizerorFizz · 07/03/2025 14:47

@MerryMeet I really have not seen this behaviour from SLT in schools. Maybe it's where I live? We are all pretty pleasant. I can see issues in secondary schools with unprofessional SLT. Of course SLTs like this should be the subject of numerous complaints. Ofsted have to be told about them. It's also a massive shame there's VAT on private schools because parents now have limited choice and if your local school doesn't suit dc, you cannot get into another school and are priced out of private education which, in general, is kinder and more responsive to parents.

WearyAuldWumman · 07/03/2025 14:51

FrippEnos · 07/03/2025 14:33

You sound very much like my first couple of HoDs and HT.

It is a shame that there are not more like you in the profession.

Thank you. That's very much appreciated.

MerryMeet · 07/03/2025 15:11

TizerorFizz · 07/03/2025 14:47

@MerryMeet I really have not seen this behaviour from SLT in schools. Maybe it's where I live? We are all pretty pleasant. I can see issues in secondary schools with unprofessional SLT. Of course SLTs like this should be the subject of numerous complaints. Ofsted have to be told about them. It's also a massive shame there's VAT on private schools because parents now have limited choice and if your local school doesn't suit dc, you cannot get into another school and are priced out of private education which, in general, is kinder and more responsive to parents.

I think it’s worse in primary and that’s because headteachers are worried about losing their jobs if they have a bad Ofsted. Everything is oriented towards Ofsted. Independent schools essentially fund their inspectorate so they know they’re not going to be slated in an inspection.

There is the same issue (Ofsted) in secondary schools but the schools are larger and teachers have multiple classes.

I’ve taught in both primary and secondary schools (primary trained and was a LA advisory teacher for years.)

Moonnstars · 07/03/2025 15:17

Strictlymad · 07/03/2025 06:55

What she should have said rather than don’t worry about it was ‘I’m very sorry Tommy, that was my mistake, please use the book for today and I will replace the sticker after school’ then he wouldn’t have done it

How do we know they didn't?
This might be exactly what was said to the child, only they impulsively got cross and scribbled it out. The punishment (although extreme) is for them not listening and taking it into their own hands.

TizerorFizz · 07/03/2025 15:26

@MerryMeet This sanction is over stated too. There are some heads who aren't good enough. However many stay in post for years and are given opportunities to improve their school. If it is inadequate and doesn't improve, they should go. Dc only get one chance at this. I have rarely seen any head get removed. Many move on with a pay off. By agreement.

MerryMeet · 07/03/2025 15:44

TizerorFizz · 07/03/2025 15:26

@MerryMeet This sanction is over stated too. There are some heads who aren't good enough. However many stay in post for years and are given opportunities to improve their school. If it is inadequate and doesn't improve, they should go. Dc only get one chance at this. I have rarely seen any head get removed. Many move on with a pay off. By agreement.

I’ve never seen a head stay after a school goes into Inadequate - not sure about pay offs but they have to put their last school on their next application and it will be known that they were head of a school judged Inadequate. That’s in secondary though.

graceinspace999 · 07/03/2025 15:52

JustFeedMeCake · 07/03/2025 14:27

Wow. Way to blame the child and rather sarcastically too. Not nice.

No sarcasm- just suggestions and perhaps another point of view.

As for child blaming? Not nice?

Is it nice to blame the teacher without knowing for sure what happened?

Ireallywantadoughnut36 · 07/03/2025 15:57

Oooh what a mean spirited thing of the teacher to do, it's not really vandalism if he's just written the correct name is it. I'd be more worried that if this is the approach, then what is going on in the classroom. If this came home in my kids bag I'd be popping in for a chat about what reward and discipline structures they're using and are they appropriate. It's vaguely vindictive because it'd definitely be easier to pop a new sticker over the old one or cut and stick the work, so the teacher is very much making a point, which I don't think is very healthy given they're in charge of lots of 8 yr olds.

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