To cancel surgery due to DC coldsore

[Mamamover]

Hey guys

As the title says. I have surgery in a couple of days. NHS, something i’ve been waiting for a number of years.

DC is 15 months old and has got what appears to be a coldsore on DC top lip.
I’m absolutely panic stricken and guilt ridden I feel like I should now cancel my surgery.

Why? Because I can’t police it. During nappy changes they always grab their bits and i’m so worried about them transferring to the nappy area. This can happen during a first coldsore outbreak as the body is still building up antibodies. My solution is to pop socks on DC hands during nappy changes while this is current.

DH has said to not be ridiculous and he will police it and go ahead with surgery. However I know DH will forget to pop the socks on DC hands and I just think I should just cancel because i’m going to be worried sick.

AIBU?

You're being a fucking Muppet. You know you're being a fucking Muppet because otherwise you wouldn't have started this thread inviting people to call you a fucking Muppet.

Listen to that inner voice, it's right. It knows you're scared of surgery and are looking for any excuse to cancel it. It's screaming at you, "Stop being a fucking Muppet."

What the fuck have I have just read? One of the most self-absorbed, bonkers things I have ever read.

If you're that anxious, please cancel the surgery and give it to someone who'd be more appreciative

You need to let go of the control more x

I don't want to add to a pile on as you obviously have massive health anxiety but everyone is right - the chances of A - DC actually having a cold sore rather than just a random spot and B - even if it is a cold sore transferring it to their genitals is tiny,

If it helps, I have suffered horrendously with cold sores my entire life and I am sure as a careless teen and young adult I often had active sores on my face and didn't take a lot of care but to this day, as a woman in her 50s, I have never transferred the herpes virus in the way you fear. My understanding is that that particular transmission method is more associated with adult activities... not a baby swiping a hand from mouth to groin. I was also scared of giving it to my babies. I haven't.

I don't know what your surgery is but we all know how long it will take to get another slot if you cancel and it could be something that gets worse and has a far greater impact on your ability to care for DC if you don't have this operation now.

So, gently, OP please do what you know already is right, trust your DH to look after DC and focus on your operation and recovery.

Trust your husband.

I think you need some help with your anxiety.

Not that you’ll get it on the NHS mind.

Some private sessions may really help you though.

Oh it’s that poster. Who has never kissed her baby and has a panic if anyone tries to do so.

in that case I seriously doubt it’s a cold sore. Where would he have got it from?

even if it is in a couple of days it will have scabbed over and won’t be an issue.

You were told in your previous thread that you were massively overreacting and being completely unfair on your child about your fear of coldsores. By everyone. This is the same thing again. You are massively overreacting .

Completely missing the point here but surely socks on hands doesn’t stop anything? If she touched mouth and then genitals the risk is still the same with or without hand covering… it’s why you wash towels etc post a cold sore and don’t share cups- it’s transferred on fabric/surfaces too.

But yes likelihood of it being cold sore minimal and you need to have the op.

Please get some help for your anxiety. With kindness, you are being absolutely ridiculous.