To wonder what happens when a child is neglected? What is the threshold for safeguarding procedures?

[Cassy2000]

Two girls, 8 and 10. Homework and reading never done at home with mum (sometimes done at other relatives’ houses) and behind in all areas, hair unbrushed, bathed twice a week, persistent untreated contagious infections. School notified repeatedly about the infections.

What is the threshold for any kind of action? Is this just deemed “good enough” parenting?

Is there anything you can do to help them? Or your son? Get their medical needs met at the very least?

We have moved 150 miles to live near them and have my granddaughter at least three days and nights a week. He wants to leave her and we’re supporting him with, basically, an escape plan for him and her. But I’m aware that means leaving the two eldest with her.

I’m not saying my son is blameless here but he was 20 and very inexperienced when they met, and she was 30, married with two kids. He works sixty hours a week and she doesn’t/won’t work.

Their dad is in the picture but they’ve been fully turned against him and his new wife. I know he’s been pushing for more custody and raising all the same issues we see to the school. We’ve been reporting to the school and nursery too but it doesn’t seem to be high enough for any intervention.

Make the report, exaggerate to get them the attention.
Take your son and GD
move away and don’t look back.

You mention "violence to animals" OP. RSPCA will tell you this often goes hand in glove with violence to children.

Reporting to school and nursery is not enough. You need to report to social services directly as well.

Other than the infections, none of that sounds anywhere near the threshold to me.

No, do not exaggerate. Report what you know, no more, no less. How can social services prioritise who needs help most urgently if people exaggerate - by doing this you could be taking a social worker away from a situation that truly needs input immediately. And it'll make your referral seem less reliable if parts are false / exaggerated.

Awful advice.

There’s nothing we’d rather do but we need to tread very carefully with her.

Honestly it doesn't sound likely that it would meet the threshold for social services intervention. And if it did it would be at the lowest level (3 or 4) meaning any intervention is very much voluntary and by consent. The best and most likely avenue to protect them is for their father to apply to court. That's not something you have any control over however. Having said all that, there may be more info known by the school or GP so it's still worth reporting to social services.

Is your son planning on moving out with his daughter without telling her mum?! Why does he need an escape plan?

So many PP saying to report to the school. The school do not have the knowledge you seem to have, they wouldn't make a report on your behalf because it's hearsay. If you have concerns then you make the referral to social care. That said, wouldn't meet threshold anyway by the sounds of it.