To think green is quite neutral as a colour?

[Mshonie]

Out today with DD(2) wearing a puddle suit as where we were was very muddy. I put her in this

https://www.marksandspencer.com/hooded-frog-puddlesuit/p/clp60496763?color=GREENMIX

Absolutely everyone referred to her as ‘he.’ It doesn’t bother me and in fairness the puddle suit is a hand me down from her brother but I’d have thought the outfit was definitely neutral rather than boy?

My eldest DS had ringlets as a toddler and everybody thought he was a girl no matter what I put him in. Once his hair was cut it didn't happen anymore.

I find it odd when people get annoyed the baby isn't the sex they think it is. Green is definitely neutral!
When DD was about 6 months old, she was wearing a t shirt with Miffy the rabbit on. It was blue and purple, and this woman kept referring to her as him despite it being a fairly "girlie" t shirt. She got annoyed as she thought she should be wearing pink and told me I'd get the boy I clearly wanted next time!!!

They assume the wearer is a boy cos its a frog and no self respecting girl is picking one of them up.

Well that's what I suspect is the cause

I personally love it and think it's gender neutral. BTW I did used to pick up amphibians but not any more.

My son had this puddle suit, so did my friends daughter. It's definitely gender neutral.

Unless a very small child is dressed in typically boys or girls clothing it can sometimes be hard to tell their gender and I've definitely refrained from referring to 'he' or 'she' to avoid putting my foot in it. Hair has a lot to do with it; I myself didn't have much until I was 3.

People are odd.

My sons have been mistaken for girls when they've been head to toe in blue with truck motifs on the front and short hair.

The green suit is cute!

This is a color that can be worn by both men and women. I am a girl and I also like green.

People always thought my boy was a girl if he was wearing red or yellow and my girl was a boy if she was wearing green or blue. I never had anyone get cross about it, though!

I don't think it means anything much, people have these subconscious associations for whatever reason and little children look very similar anyway.

Logically people do know that you can't tell the sex of a child from how they are dressed, and many people would avoid using gendered pronouns about little kids because we know they all look the same, but brains can make these connections that you know are illogical and things can slip out.

I am about to write an entirely pointless post- because I am waiting for a meeting to begin and am interested in the thread.* My nearly 15 year old boy has longer curly hair (down to jawline so not even that long). Our favourite greasy spoon we eat in town the owner always says 'what would this young lady like today?'. Ds is very clearly a boy and in boy clothes. But I think there is just a genuine hiccup in the owner's brain that sees 'longer hair - girl'. DS does not mind about it. He thinks it's a little quirk of the owner and he knows it's not meant to offend or anything (in this case it is not meant to offend, we have been going there for years and the owner just doesn't seem to register DS is a boy). He was always being mistaken for a girl as a toddler. He has sensory issues and hair cutting has always been deeply traumatic for him as it 'hurts' so always had longer hair.

*Just musing out loud really.

In my experience anything that isn't specifically girl (pink, frills, glitter, etc) is automatically assumed to be boy no matter how neutral it is.

I had two boys first and never paid much attention to it, but then my third was a girl and I was shocked by the girl section. All pink and frills, which I dislike, and it makes you feel like no other colour exists.

Some people live to very strict rules about what boys , girls, women and men can look behave / like / do / say / eat / do for jobs & hobbies . I know this is their religion / ideology / belief system and they are of course entitled to believe in it.

Personally I don’t agree and I’ve raised my kids to know that they can have any kind of clothes / hair style / hobby / interests / personality / appearance they like, regardless of their sex. They don’t need to live their lives in tiny boxes created by others, they can just be themselves, they are perfect the way they are.

I also hate the homophobia implied in the “ you can’t dress your son in a pink tee shirt as it will turn him gay “ nonsense . Your child will be straight / gay / lesbian / bi as an adult whatever you dress them in and that’s ok too.

If I saw a small child holding a frog / jumping in puddles Id talk to them about what they were doing . If you feel the need to know if the child is a boy or girl to interact with them, it’s you who has the problem.

If the parent has a concern that you might misgender their children , they will nearly aways signal by saying “ Yes Sophie loves frogs, she has three frog toys on her bed “ or “ Isaac wants to be a scientist when he grows up “.

I think when people don't see head to toe pink/lilac or long hair the default is male.

Unfortunately I also think people assume you'll be less 'insulted' if you call a girl a boy than the other way round. My young DD gets called a boy because I assume she wears neutral gender clothes and hasn't got pigtails etc (nor does she, she never says boy/girl, or describe things as boy/girl toys etc too young I guess. I don't give a toss, but people are very apologetic when they ask what's his name etc.

My energetic dog is always called a boy, even though she's quite 'pretty' I think it's because she's barky & can run very fast
Again, she's doing active things and the default is male

Can't believe the whole pink for a girl, blue for a boy, thing is still going on.

40 years ago I dressed my little girls in various colours, very rarely was one of those colours pink as it's a colour I'm not keen on.

My son who is now in his mid 40s also wore various colours as well, when I could get them.

I would definitely dress my child, if I had one, in that cute little suit whether a he or a she.

I'm old now, but never make assumptions about the sex of a child and always ask, if it's relevant, if get into conversation with an adult with a small child I don't know.

I think that's entirely neutral and I like it. But people are so into sex stereotypes now that if you don't dress boys in blue and girls in pink with ribbons people mis-sex them. Nuts.

To be fair any colour can be worn by anyone. Pink was always a boys colour till the mid-twentieth century (for St Joseph) and blue was for girls (Virgin Mary).

I tend to play it safe and pretend I'm talking to the baby eg 'What's your name?' even if they're too young to answer and I'm clearly asking the parent.
I once asked a Mum at soft play what her little girl was called (wearing a lovely blue tracksuit) and she confirmed he was in fact a boy but just had a very feminine face (her words). He also had long curly blonde hair so maybe that was why my brain automatically thought girl...I certainly didn't mean any offence and the other Mum didn't seem at all offended. But as above, I try to play it safe now until I know for sure. Lots of names common for both boys and girls as well...Remy, Rowan etc.

Absolutely everyone referred to her as ‘he.’

And how many people made these comments?

Same here.

DS has been mistaken for a girl since birth due to his long, thick eyelashes.

We now get a lot of "ladies" comments which is quite funny when he talks and his voice has unmistakably broken to masculine pitches.

Genuine errors have never bothered me. Just stupid comments from people who think males need short hair and are clearly judgemental and narrow minded.

I was amused when a lady was admiring "her" in the pram, asked "her" name and did a double take when she heard his traditional name. She looked like she'd thought I'd gone new-fangled with names 😂

I didn’t know the gender of my DC before they were born & I absolutely did not want to put them in white and beige. I bought everything in green, yellow, red, orange. I quickly learned if they aren’t in pink it’s assumed they’re a boy!

I have a boy who's had long hair for a looooong time. His choice. (Persuaded him to let me trim it recently!) We've both stopped correcting people or just used 'he' when it crops up. Neither of us care. He might when he's a teen but I imagine he'll be more obviously male by then! He's got a lovely way with little ones and often chooses quiet play and chatting over more boisterous play in places like playgrounds. I often think he's going to grow up to be a fab guy. Anyway - sometimes people are mortified when they get it wrong, and I always brush it off and make them feel better but I'm at the point where i just find it really interesting, the way it's considered so offensive to be misinterpreted as the opposite sex when they're teeny and couldn't give a shit!

@flowerrrrpoweerr I sometimes forget dogs can be girls because my last few have been boys! I only recently realised I was assuming dogs were male until proven otherwise. Tbh my last dog was much better with girls than boys and we always seemed to see boy dogs on walks it felt like, so maybe that's why, I was preempting dickhead mode switching on, assuming the worst and hoping for better 😆

We painted DS’ nursery green because we didn’t know if we were having a boy or a girl. He has a lot of green and yellow clothes, although tonight he is wearing a pink and green dinosaur sleepsuit that was a hand me down from my friend’s DD babies don’t care what they wear!

People ask sometimes if he's a boy or a girl if he’s wearing something like a brown or cream pram suit, not because it’s ‘girly’ or ‘boyish’ but because people just like to make conversation! He is a very pretty little boy though his eyelashes are the stuff of dreams!

Oops! 7mo DS was all in pink yesterday. I maintain that sets of babygrows/vests are unisex if they have both pink and blue (and he looks gorgeous in pink, purple and dark blue. 🥰 )

www.britannica.com/story/has-pink-always-been-a-girly-color

It must be hair - there are so many children at the local primary school with pony tails I assume are girls, only to be corrected. Most girls are wearing trousers at this time of year.

But having said that, I also get names wrong as well - I assumed Harper was a girl - nope, boy. I assumed Kimmy was a girl, nope boy (Kimberley), I assumed Sue was a girl, nope boy (written Sioux) - all in my granddaughter's class.

Having said that, my daughter who had two long blond plaits, was repeatedly referred to as 'he' during a dental appointment - she was wearing a blue gingham school dress - I didn't correct the dentist. Never fathomed that one.

People always called by DD 'he' because of her short hair (never been cut, she just didn't have much until she was 3). And although I know it's dumb, I do the same. I wouldn't worry about it!

It’s borderline ‘boy’ for me.

I agree with poster that these days anything that isn’t pink and frilly is boy. We seem to have regressed in regards to gender stereotyping with clothes.