To involve school? Online Bullying

[thatsmyopinion]

Dd2 is 12, in year 8.

Dd1, her adult sister does a job that involves her having public social media accounts. She has been getting really nasty comments and dm’s from a group of at least 3-4 girls who go DD2’s school. There are some anonymous /private accounts too that could potentially be the same.

Dd2 hasn’t been mentioned in any of the messages so I don't know if they even know dd1 is her sister or if they just found dd1s account randomly (they have a different surname) She’s having no problems directly with any of the girls in or out of school.

Dd1 obviously isn’t bothered by the messages, it happens often and she is adult and can ignore them.
But I’m concerned with the things these girls are saying, especially inappropriate and offensive things for their age and with Dd2 being in school with them.

WIBU to involve the school and expect them to do something? Or is this not their responsibility?

It sounds like your DD who is at the school isn't involved in this situation? In which case, it's nothing to do with the school.

Your DD1 is an adult and isn't bothered by it.

I'd leave it alone.

Or maybe print out screenshots and post them to their parents anonymously...

Hi OP sorry this is happening but I’d DEFINITELY not involve the school especially as they’ve not explicitly mentioned your DD.

going to the school would only make things potentially bad for your DD when it’s not bad at the moment for her as far as they’re concerned

Your adult daughter should complain to the SM providers

Apart from the last sentence which I absolutely wouldn’t do … ABSOLUTELY THIS

Yes, that's correct.

I guess my concern is that they might be doing it as she is DD2’s sister as a way of getting to her. Dd2 doesn’t have social media so they wouldn’t be able to bully her directly.

But also just their ability to be so nasty and if they don’t get the reaction they want they might escalate to saying things to dd2 at school or might already be doing it to another child in the school.

Yeah I totally get your concerns that it’s possibly getting at your DD indirectly via her sister and that’s a definite possibility

Re: your last paragraph - again I totally get your concerns but we are always told specifically not to give bullies ‘the ‘reaction they want’. There’s a slim chance you could be right and they may escalate but in this situation I wouldn’t go to the school as it would be giving more oxygen to the bad behaviour iyswim

That makes sense @MySpaceQueen
I can wait and just keep an eye incase anything escalates

I'd report it to the non emergency police as online harassment and hope the police followed it up with a chat. It's not really the schools place to get involved.

Schools cannot police social media, especially if it isn’t nastiness between children.

We can, and do, talk to children and inform parents - but honestly it really isn’t our job.

Why has adult daughter not blocked them?

Really? that seems more over top.
She can mean messages from 100+ people some days if videos have done well and can't report them all to the police

The 3-4 non anonymous ones, yes I absolutely would report to the police. Screenshot the lot and send over in bulk.
This isn't anything schools can deal with.

If the school has a community police officer, you could mention it to him or her directly.