To try or not to try yet? WWYD?

[BaklavaPalava]

Posting here for traffic! DH is 32 and I’m 27. No kids yet. Can’t decide whether to come off contraception in a few months and TTC or to wait to TTC until summer next year. We’ve been married for over 3 years and we own a home with a mortgage. Basically we have car loan that won’t be paid off (about 500 per month) until spring 2027. I don’t think my work will offer maternity pay so I’d be on about 300 per week statutory maternity pay for 6 months (not in UK) and unpaid if I decided to take an extra 4 months. I pay about 500 towards our mortgage and we were thinking if we waited until the car loan was paid off, DH could allocate that 500 to cover my mortgage payment. From anyone who’s been in a similar situation did you go ahead or wait a bit longer? Was it a financial stretch? We’re saving separately and will probably buy most of the big stuff before I’d actually have to go on mat leave and while I’m still earning my full wage. I’m happy to wait but more conscious of DH age being five years older than me, and the fact we’d want more than one child. We’d also like to go to Japan next year so there’s that! Just looking for some pearls of wisdom really!

for voting purposes;

YANABU - wait til next year
YABU - crack on this year

Money wise it makes sense to wait. Is your car a decent family car though? If not I'd look at swapping it anyway.

I think you're not that old so not necessarily a rush to TTC. Had mine at 36 and 38 (DH same age and we conceived first time) and had done lots of travelling plus had no financial constraints. I travelled with small babies but it's not the same kind of trip at all so if the Japan trip is important to you I would do that first and focus on saving otherwise as much as possible.

Pay off debts, do those big trips, save some money.

Maternity leave is lonely and isolating if you can't go out and do stuff. Nice coffee dates, baby and mum classes, get some nice outfits etc

And traveling with a baby is hard work. You won't be going to Japan for quite a few years.

I'd wait. Pay off the car loan, save, go to Japan, potentially look at a new job with better benefits and then try.

Life with children is infinitely easier and more enjoyable if you're not worried about money.

Thanks everyone! The responses are very interesting because when I posted in AIBU the consensus is to wait a bit, but when I posted on the conception board the answers were a majority geared towards starting TTC sooner!

You'll get a lot of bias depending on which board you post on. People on the conception board have often had struggles and wish they started earlier, hence the swing in that direction.

Well, people mostly go on the conception board when they have problems conceiving. For most women with no known underlying conditions, 27 is pretty early and statistically you'll be fine. None of us have a crystal ball obviously.

Can I just say, slightly off topic but I’ve just come back from Japan with a two year old and it was a breeze - really child friendly country, cities were accessible and easy to get around with a pram. Travelling with a little one is about 50% practical logistics and 50% mindset imo!

I don’t ever think there is a right time to start but you’re 27 which is still young and maternity leave does hammer you financially so if you can get into a position where you have a good amount saved as a cushion, that will make it a lot easier.

Thanks everyone. It’s good to hear other perspectives.