Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have buyer remorse over first house purchase?

29 replies

Croissantsfordinner · 27/02/2025 16:47

Sharing here on MN as I don’t want to speak to DH about this in RL. I have an ever so small touch of buyer’s remorse I think.

We have just bought our first home after 10+ years of saving. We live in an expensive are just outside London and we had to compromise quite a bit (didn’t want to change area due to DS school being there). Although small, I like the property overall, it has lovely period features and a nice back garden, which we never had before as we always lives in a block of flats. We have only been there 4 months and have made some changes to improve it, like some nice wooden flooring (had old, stained carpets), have repainted the whole place and decorated it to suit our taste, within our means. So I am overall happy with the property inside.

The issue that keeps hanging at the back of my mind though is that it is on a busy road. I don’t mean a motorway type of road but a busy road, e.g. a fairly constant stream of traffic all day.

The only room facing the busy road is the living room, the rest is on the side and back of the property. Kitchen + back garden feel very secluded and cannot hear any traffic noise, just birds with lots of squirrels etc. The noise isn’t too bad from the living room either as we have double glazed windows, although if the tv is off you can definitely hear a bit of car noise during the day.

The main thing that concerns me is the potential risks of pollution but I don’t know whether I am over thinking it? The road itself is busy, yes, but we are surrounded by lots of quiet and green residential streets as well as a lovely park just on the other side of the road (so it’s not like we live in an overall very busy area, the are itself is very sought after and residential and lovely, it’s just our road that is busy).

I am thinking that maybe we made a mistake and we should have settled for something less pretty but not on a busy road – this will not be our forever home but we will definitely have to be in it for at least the next 5-8 years or so.

Can anyone share their experience, do you get used to it? I keep telling myself that if we lived in the city centre or in any other busy city, lots of cars and traffic would be the norm? My DH is originally from Milan, which is a very polluted city, I am sure that would be worst than living on a busy road in a cute surrey village?

OP posts:
GlacialLook · 27/02/2025 16:53

Buyers' remorse is practically compulsory, like a survey and conveyancing fees! I guarantee that if you had bought the less pretty house on a quieter street, you would be tormenting yourself about its ugliness or overlookedness or something else. I hear you on traffic noise -- we bought our house during lockdown so the roads were empty, and weren't fully prepared for how busy the road we're on can be in rush hour, though the front garden is enormous, and we're high up, over the road. But swings and roundabouts.

Just relax in the full knowledge that you're undergoing an inevitable part of the house-buying process.

flyinghen · 27/02/2025 16:53

I think your house sounds lovely! Congratulations!

BooomShakeTheRoom · 27/02/2025 16:56

Everyone has to compromise and all houses have pros and cons. If you went for a quiet street, you’d probably have to go even smaller.

cmma01 · 27/02/2025 16:57

Croissantsfordinner · 27/02/2025 16:47

Sharing here on MN as I don’t want to speak to DH about this in RL. I have an ever so small touch of buyer’s remorse I think.

We have just bought our first home after 10+ years of saving. We live in an expensive are just outside London and we had to compromise quite a bit (didn’t want to change area due to DS school being there). Although small, I like the property overall, it has lovely period features and a nice back garden, which we never had before as we always lives in a block of flats. We have only been there 4 months and have made some changes to improve it, like some nice wooden flooring (had old, stained carpets), have repainted the whole place and decorated it to suit our taste, within our means. So I am overall happy with the property inside.

The issue that keeps hanging at the back of my mind though is that it is on a busy road. I don’t mean a motorway type of road but a busy road, e.g. a fairly constant stream of traffic all day.

The only room facing the busy road is the living room, the rest is on the side and back of the property. Kitchen + back garden feel very secluded and cannot hear any traffic noise, just birds with lots of squirrels etc. The noise isn’t too bad from the living room either as we have double glazed windows, although if the tv is off you can definitely hear a bit of car noise during the day.

The main thing that concerns me is the potential risks of pollution but I don’t know whether I am over thinking it? The road itself is busy, yes, but we are surrounded by lots of quiet and green residential streets as well as a lovely park just on the other side of the road (so it’s not like we live in an overall very busy area, the are itself is very sought after and residential and lovely, it’s just our road that is busy).

I am thinking that maybe we made a mistake and we should have settled for something less pretty but not on a busy road – this will not be our forever home but we will definitely have to be in it for at least the next 5-8 years or so.

Can anyone share their experience, do you get used to it? I keep telling myself that if we lived in the city centre or in any other busy city, lots of cars and traffic would be the norm? My DH is originally from Milan, which is a very polluted city, I am sure that would be worst than living on a busy road in a cute surrey village?

Sounds like there's a fair bit of greenery and trees-ery around to suck up the CO2.
As soon as visitors come round and say they love your house, you'll be delighted with it and have no regrets.

Loubylie · 27/02/2025 17:05

A lot of women get buyers remorse (maybe men too ... I don't know).
It's part of a general strive for perfection.
Your house sounds lovely. Sounds like you made a good choice.
If you are upwardly mobile (!), maybe your next house can be just as lovely and on a quiet road. Or maybe you will have to stay in your current place but you'll manage to be perfectly happy. In the meantime, enjoy your life ... and be grateful for double glazing and the fact that cars are not nearly as polluting as they used to be.

Croissantsfordinner · 27/02/2025 17:09

It’s mainly the worry about pollution tbh, noise can be annoying but I know it’s something you get used to and cannot hear it from the bedrooms or the back garden and kitchen.
I keep thinking I am exposing DS to health risks because of this, appreciate it’s a silly thought maybe as it would likely be worse if we lived back in Milan where DH is from for example (living in the city centre is highly desirable there for example)

OP posts:
Namechangersanonymous · 27/02/2025 17:16

not exactly the same, but I get buyers remorse from browsing through the property section for my dream home post fictional lottery win. 😄

no matter how much I set my imaginary budget, there’s always something that means it’s not quite right…we are talking about £8m homes here! No matter how much you have to spend, there’s always a home just out of budget that’s exactly what you want! But even then, it won’t be in the exact location I would like.

the whole exercise makes me happy I haven’t won the lottery. Stressful.

that’s a long way of saying that even if you doubled your budget, you’d be feeling exactly the same.

Loubylie · 27/02/2025 17:28

You could buy an anti pollution screen for your child's window if you wanted to put your mind at rest. Then you could relax about it.

Poppyseeds79 · 27/02/2025 17:42

Buy a decent air purifier for the living room, and add spider plants and peace lilies too.

GoodToBeHome · 27/02/2025 17:43

I really wouldn't worry too much, if the back is filled with greenery open windows at the back of the house for fresh air but keep the ones at the front closed.
Your house sounds lovely!

MyVIsForVendetta · 27/02/2025 17:49

OP get an Airblu air purifier.

It says red/green when the air is clear.

my friend got one who was on a very busy road.

i have one for my kids who have allergies (we live rurally and by a busy road - oxymoron?!)

MyVIsForVendetta · 27/02/2025 17:50

Sorry Blueair

ThatGladTiger · 27/02/2025 17:56

If you had bought a not so pretty or smaller house in a quiet road would you have regretted it?

If you had moved further out and got a bigger house would you regret not being close to schools?

Enjoy your house and don’t beat yourself up over the decision!

Sw1989 · 27/02/2025 18:17

Very similar situation to you here, we also live on a busy road, we brought the house during the first lockdown so were unaware how busy it actually was! Prior to this, we lived on an extremely busy main road next to some traffic lights, which I hated but my wife had got used to it, having lived in the house for 8 years before I moved in. I've definitely got used to the traffic noise on our road, and our house backs onto some really beautiful woodland which definitely helps. We love the house (detached 1930s house) but like you, don't think we will be here for ever. You do definitely get used to the traffic though, it is annoying but the positive is houses on busy roads are often a lot cheaper and in many other ways, the house had everything we wanted. Our bedroom is at the front of the house and we often sleep with windows open and I barely noticed it now!

Croissantsfordinner · 27/02/2025 20:43

MyVIsForVendetta · 27/02/2025 17:49

OP get an Airblu air purifier.

It says red/green when the air is clear.

my friend got one who was on a very busy road.

i have one for my kids who have allergies (we live rurally and by a busy road - oxymoron?!)

But I am scared it will flag the air is poor and I will panic even more! I don’t ever open the front room windows, just the side and the back ones. But isn’t pollution still “around”?

OP posts:
MyVIsForVendetta · 28/02/2025 08:01

No, that’s literally the whole point of the air purifier. 😊

Didimum · 28/02/2025 08:18

Croissantsfordinner · 27/02/2025 20:43

But I am scared it will flag the air is poor and I will panic even more! I don’t ever open the front room windows, just the side and the back ones. But isn’t pollution still “around”?

It’s not ‘all around’. It is at a certain level and can be blocked or absorbed. We live fairly rurally but on a fairly busy road. Our house is set higher than road level as it’s up a flight of stairs and front of house is completely shielded by hedges and trees so the living space inside house is fine.

If a lot of greenery planting isn’t an option then an air purifier is a good idea.

Do you even know the emissions on your road? They might not even be an issue, depending on the type of vehicles that use it. You can check online.

Croissantsfordinner · 28/02/2025 08:43

@Didimum no I haven’t checked the emission, I am kind of scared it’s bad and I will be depressed. But out of interest, where do I check?
We have some tall bushes repairing the house from the street and we are a few mt away from the pavement as there is a little front yard behind the bushes, not sure this is enough to protect the property from pollution though

OP posts:
Didimum · 28/02/2025 09:33

Croissantsfordinner · 28/02/2025 08:43

@Didimum no I haven’t checked the emission, I am kind of scared it’s bad and I will be depressed. But out of interest, where do I check?
We have some tall bushes repairing the house from the street and we are a few mt away from the pavement as there is a little front yard behind the bushes, not sure this is enough to protect the property from pollution though

It sounds like the anxiety here is likely worse that the effects from pollution. Are you feeling more out of sorts of down due to the house move in general?

There are a lot of things that increase and decrease exposure to pollution – hedges, level of house, opening windows, time of day, flowing traffic verses standstill traffic, type of vehicle.

Your local council website should have air pollution reports for your area and live monitoring station data.

Redbushteaforme · 28/02/2025 09:58

There are UK websites where you can enter your postcode and get an idea of air quality. If you have room in your front garden, plant shrubs/hedges/trees which absorb/block pollution. You can find info on the best species for this online. Google for house plants which can do the same inside.

Also consider air purifiers and pollution screens etc.

If you are really concerned, you need to get info then decide either whether you need to mitigate and if doing so will solve your anxiety, or whether it worries you so much that you need to think about moving.

You may be surprised when you check your postcode to find that the results are actually fine. A lot depends on the kind if traffic, height of buildings facing on to the road etc.

Gerwurtztraminer · 28/02/2025 10:04

Croissantsfordinner · 28/02/2025 08:43

@Didimum no I haven’t checked the emission, I am kind of scared it’s bad and I will be depressed. But out of interest, where do I check?
We have some tall bushes repairing the house from the street and we are a few mt away from the pavement as there is a little front yard behind the bushes, not sure this is enough to protect the property from pollution though

Honestly these sound like intrusive thoughts not normal buyers remorse, and you've fixated on pollution and the potential effect on your son. Is there a reason you might be excessively worried about his health? Has something happened that might have set this anxiety off, even just the change and stress of moving house.

As far as the potential pollution, it really doesn't sound like an area that will be high or cause health issues. But if you want to do something, a an air purifier will help, along with getting indoor houseplants for extra air purification (google ones that are good for air filtration). You can also look at planting more air filtering shrubs & plants out the front to block the road even more.

Whatever you do don't let this anxiety take hold and get worse. Find some help and take control of it.

Bubblesgun · 28/02/2025 10:08

Croissantsfordinner · 27/02/2025 17:09

It’s mainly the worry about pollution tbh, noise can be annoying but I know it’s something you get used to and cannot hear it from the bedrooms or the back garden and kitchen.
I keep thinking I am exposing DS to health risks because of this, appreciate it’s a silly thought maybe as it would likely be worse if we lived back in Milan where DH is from for example (living in the city centre is highly desirable there for example)

part and parcel of living in London or any capital cities for that matter. If you dknt want any pollution you should live rurally.

jonestly. Congrats on your first house. Stop overthinking and start enjoying

FanSpamTastic · 28/02/2025 10:52

We are also on a busy road and not far from a big hospital - so traffic all day and ambulances with full sirens. I still get buyers remorse but we've been here 18 years now! You do get used to it. Enjoy your new place!

Croissantsfordinner · 28/02/2025 11:13

Thank you all, your messages are really making me feel a bit better! I went on London Air and entered the postcode and based on results, the pollution level is exactly the same as our previous rented home which was in a much more beautiful residential road (top location I aspire to go back to one day) so maybe being close to the main road doesn't make such a difference after all? Strange!
Here are the results:

To have buyer remorse over first house purchase?
OP posts:
Croissantsfordinner · 28/02/2025 11:17

Although if I move the arrow slightly the NO2 level rises a bit and becomes red instead of green :(

OP posts: