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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

First week at uni as an older student- Do I complain?

63 replies

killedtheplant · 26/02/2025 02:43

Hi All, I am overseas studying nursing and being in my 30's the class is a mixed bag of all ages, genders and backgrounds as expected. We are in week one and although naturally its going to be a lot to take in, I have been struggling the most with the teens who have just finished a 1 year pre-nursing course to gain them access to the university study from finishing school. The problems I am having are that some of us are not fresh off the back of a pre nursing course and are learning a lot of this stuff for the first time and im finding that during class a group of the pre nursing students are constantly shouting out the answers and theories to the tutor while she is explaining. This leads to the tutor to move on and almost expects that we all are up to scratch. A lot of us arent! I am by no means shaming the other students for their knowledge but I feel its bad show of the tutor to have such an 'ok you guys got this! well lets move on then' attitude when many of us are still not informed about the topic we just whizzed over. I know a few of you may suggest calling the tutor out next time and explaining that I haven't indeed 'got it' and would like to be informed. Do I send the tutor an email and explain my thoughts or do I just stick it out and hope that the tutorials become more in-depth?

OP posts:

Patterncarmen · 27/02/2025 20:13

Go see your tutor during feedback/office hours with your concerns and your questions and get them to explain things to you again if it isn’t clear. That’s not a problem, and shows your instructor you want to learn.

MellersSmellers · 27/02/2025 20:42

Ilovelifeverymuch · 26/02/2025 03:09

You shouldn't definitely bring it up if not your studies will suffer.

You can email if you're not comfortable speaking to him/her in person but it may be easier and more effective to go speak to the lecturer after class. If that doesn't work you can email to have a record and then take it to the next level by escalating to the department but hopefully it shouldn't get to that stage.

Agree.
Say something sooner rather than later. And the lecturer should control the class better.

Jumpers4goalposts · 27/02/2025 20:50

Speak to the tutor to say how you are feeling but don’t complain that’s just pants. Make sure you are doing your pre-reading too.

Laurmolonlabe · 27/02/2025 22:44

Definitely tell the tutor how you feel, and what you need.
I think it would be best in person, not an email- I know it tough, but it needs to be done.

Lavender14 · 27/02/2025 22:48

Agree you need to speak up in lectures to clarify things for yourself. With uni I think there's a much bigger responsibility on the student to take control of their own learning. I'd also be taking notes of anything you're not clear on so you can research it later or clarify it later with the tutor. I'd also be suggesting a study group with some of those students who've done the access course in it so you can learn from them if they're up for it.

cookie4640 · 27/02/2025 23:07

speak up! Be like, hey I don’t know this bit please go through it for me! If they don’t know you don’t know how do they know you don’t know if you don’t shout up. 💗

PrincessBing · 28/02/2025 00:40

Have a chat with the lecturer at the end and explain what's going on. You're probably not the only one- if you have a way of knowing this for sure, even better. I'd just say that your pre-nursing course peers are setting the pace at present - great for them but that this isn't the case for the majority of the cohort who need some more in depth explanations.

I used to work with the military- got taught that there's no such thing as a silly question as it could save a life. Nursing is definitely a setting this applies to!

Also I'd have a stock phrase ready incase your lecturer starts off well but slips back into the habit of suggesting moving on fast. "Actually I am not familiar with xyz". Bit scary at first I know but if you have your wording in mind you can just say it if you need to. Others may join in if needed if you go first!

ByTaupeViper · 28/02/2025 00:59

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

mathanxiety · 28/02/2025 01:51

Ohshutupdavidyoutwat · 26/02/2025 06:13

Can you not just put your hand up and say actually please can you explain as I don't know that?

Yes - what's the problem with that?

mathanxiety · 28/02/2025 01:52

LolaLouise · 26/02/2025 07:25

In nursing you have to have the confidence to speak up. When the lecturer asks the question, just say no, i dont fully understand, could you explain again in more detail, thank you. Theres no point in just waiting until after the lecture, you need to speak up in the moment too.

Yes to this.

You need to be assertive.

AKASammyScrounge · 28/02/2025 02:13

Middlepiepush · 26/02/2025 02:47

You definitely need to speak to the tutor about this. Not to complain but just to explain that you are struggling to keep up. Good luck

I agree with this. The tutor will not be aware that you are struggling a little if you don't inform her. She also needs to get on top of the poor behaviour of the young students but it will probably improve once the coursework becomes more difficult.

Sunburstclocklover · 28/02/2025 09:34

Poppins2016 · 26/02/2025 06:52

Not to complain but just to explain that you are struggling to keep up

ask if they can slow the pace down a bit as not everyone is understanding

OP, when you speak to the tutor, I wouldn't use terminology like "struggling" or "slow it down" when the reality is that you're simply not able to learn effectively as course content is being skipped because the tutor is moving on due to some students demonstrating the required knowledge.

I'd ask for a face to face chat and say that not everyone has attended a pre nursing course, so there are knowledge gaps and you (plus fellow students?) would appreciate it if all of the required course content could be covered accordingly please.

Edited

This is key! OP is not struggling the content is being skipped due to other class members shouting out and distrupting the class!

S18 · 28/02/2025 12:52

I would just say “sorry can you go over that a bit more”. But also anything on the pre nursing course is likely to be basic stuff that is on the reading lists for your course or the pre class materials.There is an expectation of independent study before classes so you know what it’s about.

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