AIBU for getting irritated by this?

[ellie09]

I have a partner of 2 years. We are both adults may I add, around 30 years old, so we have both left uni around 10 years ago.

We both went to different universities. These two universities are "rivals" so to speak, with the one he attended as being the better performing one and the one with a better reputation over the years.

From the beginning, of universities were brought up (I work with a lot of interns/apprentices etc), he would continuously make jokes about how superior his university is and how everyone that has went to my university is "stupid".

At the start, I simply laughed it off, but its getting irritating now, as its the same comments every time this university is mentioned. I asked him, did he think I was stupid then, to which is said of course not, he just does it to "wind me up"

AIBU for thinking this is a bit immature and expecting him to give it a rest at this point?

Yes it's a bit childish. Talk to him (nicely yes?) and ask him to stop.

Or point out all the things you've achieved over him, even though his university was superior😀

You both left university a decade ago? Surely the ‘joke’ wore thin a long long long time ago. I’d be binning him for being so dull and repetitive quite frankly.

I wouldn't accept it. Once or twice okay haha fun. No more.

That would irritate the hell out of me. Maybe have a serious word with him and tell him how it makes you feel. Or find something he is worried/concerned about and just make small digs back until he gets the picture.

'Has Went...' He might have a point!

Are the universities Oxford and Cambridge?

He needs to move on regardless.

If it is conflict between basically equals, Oxford v Cambridge for example I would give back as good as you get.

If it is a genuine difference between an established university and a converted polytechnic I might be inclined to call him out for snobbery as well as suggesting he shouldn't rubbish universities that your interns might be attending or could be similar to them.

Having laugh and a bit of banter is one thing but let's face it this is thinly disguised superiority.

No it's not a joke and winding you up deliberately is pathetic.

When he next says it -

Option one -

'Dennis, you're right, I am thicko. How else would I have ended up with you? HA HA HA HA HA!

Option two -

'Dennis, I'm embarrassed for you. You've been trotting out that same old lame remark about your university being superior for ten years! Ten years Dennis! You're not winding me up, I just cringe every time you say it because it makes you sound so insecure!'

Option 3 -

How about you grow up and we talk about getting divorce?

What a knob. Not ltb territory or anything but I'd be irked too.

You are probably getting irritated because you have your own issues about having gone to the ex-poly rather than the RG. So I voted YABU for that reason. If it really didn't bother you then his joke wouldn't either.

"I know love, and yet... it didn't do much for you did it ?"

Which universities?

What does that matter?

Just interested if that’s ok with you 🤷‍♂️

After 10 years of it?! I'd be irritated by any remark that's been going on that long. If 10 years of the same 'joke' don't irritate someone, maybe they'd be the one with issues.

Is this like a poly vs uni thing? Like Sheffield Hallam vs Sheffield Uni?

I doubt that an ex-Polytechnic would have rivalry with a RG University.

It bothers her because it's not funny and is pretty tedious after 2 years.

Sounds a bit like he has an inferiority complex - have you done better in your career than him since leaving Uni?
After 10 yrs what Uni you went to is completely irrelevant..

It depends- maybe he thought it was like your in joke

But that's the thing - he thinks it is their joke between them because she didn't put him straight before.

She herself says about the reputation about being better academically and reputationally. And rivals -eg. there is rivalry between Bristol and UWE and jokes about the types that go to each.

The issue is she didn't make it clear she didn't find it funny from the outset and he thinks it's their in joke.

Just let him know and move on from it.

Just wondered what it mattered what uni’s they went to because surely that wouldn’t help with the decision on whether ops unreasonable or not.

Probably not. He sounds like an insecure twat anyway.

I think good-natured ribbing is ok, but this sounds worse than that. I wouldn't like it.