Anxiety about childcare!!

[bells987]

So just before my second child was born, my partner and I booked a night away which is around 2 hours from where we live (without both children).

I was more than ready for a night away with my first (she was a terrible sleeper so think I would’ve gone crazy without it), however this time around I feel so anxious about leaving my second who has just turned 6 months.
it was mentioned to my MIL about having both of them a while ago so this plan has kind of stuck. However I feel sick with anxiety about it now. Have tried to keep pushing the anxiety away over time hoping that it will change by the time the weekend comes along! For my second’s first sleepover I’d just feel SO much more comfortable if it was my own parents looking after them. I really don’t know how to do this without massively offending my MIL but I just don’t know what to do.
at the moment my options feel like either:

1. cancel the weekend and lose £130 accommodation
2. Run the risk, explain the situation and change the childcare.

help!!!!

Can't you just push the date a few months down the line so you don't lose the accommodation cost but you can build up to it? And thank MIL but say plans have changed and then ask your parents?

Why the issue with MIL but not your own parents? Seems unfair unless there’s a back story about MIL?

No back story, totally do trust my MIL just think my youngest is more familiar with my own parents and she’s definitely a bit more clingy than my first!

Unfortunately not an option as it’s for a specific event :(

Can’t you leave youngest with your parents so they have one each, say you don’t want to over burden MIL and as youngest is so clingy better he goes to your parents.

Can you ask your parents to have your youngest and still leave the oldest with MIL? If there are no other concerns about MIL’s ability to look after your child, this might be the kindest option where you don’t upset MIL, but you’re easing your own anxiety.

@bells987- youngest is 6 months so I’m not sure how they can be “clingy” as such but it sounds like your parents have been with them more? You’ve said yourself that DC1 was a poor sleeper but you were ok leaving them. Presumably DC2 is not a poor sleeper as you’ve not mentioned that, so it might actually be easier for DC2 being away overnight?

Honestly, for 1 night I’d go - it’s so important to have time with partners and if you offend/isolate MIL for no “good” reason, you might regret it in the future when you’re desperate for some child-free time!

Send youngest to Mum and eldest to MIL - easier for everybody.

Unless there is a big back story about MIL being incapable then you’re being massively unreasonable and it’s a horrible stereotype that only the mum’s parents can be trusted with the grandchildren. Most people
don’t have anyone willing to have young children overnight so you’re very lucky and I would embrace it, it can also help to build relationships.