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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

So fed up of stories like this every single year. Stupid bloody Skiing.

638 replies

ExcessiveNumberOfNinjas · 23/02/2025 23:00

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14427223/British-schoolboy-14-killed-skiing-accident-northern-Italy.html

This poor lad, only 14 years old, crashes headlong into a tree at speed and dies of chest injuries right in front of his parents.

What's so fucking great about skiing? Every year without fail there are stories like this and I'm sick of them. I know someone who became permanently disabled and slightly brain damaged after a skiing accident in his 20s.

As parents we don't encourage our kids to get into cars and drive them at speed round a race track with very little training every half term in February do we? We don't stick them on the backs of race horses and slap their arses and watch them go over hurdles. We don't encourage them to dive off high cliffs into the sea below and hope that they manage to miss the rocks as they land. So why do we continually let them hurl down mountainsides at god knows how many miles an hour, hoping that they manage not to collide with a tree or hit their heads on a rock?

I don't get it. I never will. However 'fun' it might be it can't possibly be worth the stupid level of risk.

OP posts:
Charlotte120221 · 24/02/2025 10:24

While this accident is awful, it does not make skiing as a sport universally awful.

This poor family have suffered, but there are accidents in every part of life. Skiing can be done responsibly and safely and as skiers we can ensure we are fit before we take part, and that we ski safely once in resort.

Done responsibly it is an amazing, life enhancing sport. It is not about being a yuppie or an idiotic dare devil, it is about being out in nature and experiencing it in a unique way.

There are lots of people on here sharing horror stories, but I have to say out of all the skiing holidays my family and I have ever been on (including the kids on their school and uni trips) I only know of one broken arm and one broken wrist. I don't believe that skiing is inherently more risky than any other active sport.

Notgivenuphope · 24/02/2025 10:25

Silvernutmeg70 · 24/02/2025 09:59

Me too - wonder whether we work for the same company? I am also dealing with lots of these reports at the minute. I've never fancied skiing but this work would definitely put me off if I did.

Won’t be too outing but does the company begin with an L?

Silvernutmeg70 · 24/02/2025 10:27

Notgivenuphope · 24/02/2025 10:25

Won’t be too outing but does the company begin with an L?

Yes!

Hairoit · 24/02/2025 10:27

Franjipanl8r · 23/02/2025 23:37

Obesity is far more of a drain on the NHS than sports injuries in the UK. It’s inactivity rather than rare sporting injuries that’s more of an issue.

Yes this. Have the people posting about the horrors of skiing even tried it? There is no feeling like racing down the slopes. It’s exercise, fresh air and freedom. It’s expensive so I don’t do it now but I did as a teenager.

Sitting at home on a screen eating junk food doing no exercise is 100% more dangerous than going skiing. I’d also hazard a guess that skiers contribute much more money to the NHS than they take from it.

thedogatethecattreats · 24/02/2025 10:27

You can have a safe and boring life, and stay away from any potential risk.
And you end with life-changing injuries falling down the stairs, or slip on rocks during a safe and low key family walk and drown because you're wedged in.

Or you can have children - for a woman that's physically risky!, and do the sports you enjoy respecting the safety rules.

Just don't have kids because they do need a life and a bit of fun.

Dramatic · 24/02/2025 10:28

Mnetcurious · 24/02/2025 09:42

It really is more aspirational than an all-inclusive to Spain, or a trip to Center Parcs - let’s be real! People aren’t telling their friends how fantastic their all-inclusive in Spain/CP was and that really should go, too. It’s bog-standard and not aspirational to most. They’re not posting pictures of Spain/CP on social media in the same way as people “show off” their pictures from the slopes. Skiing is very much the holiday/hobby du jour, maybe in future it will be seen as ordinary as your other examples but it’s not at the moment.

I mean, people in my social circle do exactly that. I actually don't know a single person who has been skiing, it's just not on the radar for many people

Notgivenuphope · 24/02/2025 10:28

Silvernutmeg70 · 24/02/2025 10:27

Yes!

Second letter E and last letter A?

Kissedbyfire1 · 24/02/2025 10:29

1457bloom · 24/02/2025 07:14

Skiing is the best sport ever!

Second best Wink. We are a professional equestrian household and to us the “risks” of skiing are as nothing compared to what DH (former international) takes every day, at work.
On the point of skills, I didn’t learn to ski until adulthood, but have gone from total beginner to top intermediate/ early advanced (grade 8 or 9 depending which scale you use) in around 20-25 weeks skiing. I have had one to one lessons whenever I have wanted to add a new skill or focus on a particular aspect of technique but don’t have lessons every holiday. We aren’t wealthy and know how to make our holidays as cheap as possible.
We ski off-piste using guides where needed e.g. Vallee Blanche, Mont Fort backside and also ski-tour. We also hike in the Alps in summer.
Our children started skiing with their schools and for one of them, this experience of the high mountains and being in a family with a high tolerance of risk, has led to a career in outdoor education.

As others have said, the beauty of skiing is that if you don’t want to do it you don’t have to, and other people doing it doesn’t affect you in any way.

Scottishskifun · 24/02/2025 10:31

MontyDonsBlueScarf · 24/02/2025 09:54

When it's taught well, skiing is a great activity for someone to learn about risk and safety. When I first learned, lessons always included reading the slope, reading the conditions and making judgments about how you were going to ski something within your capabilities. Also what to do and not do around heavy machinery like lifts and piste bashers, where it's safe to stop and so on. I don't know whether this is the case now as I no longer have group lessons but given that so many people don't seem to ski with even basic common sense, I suspect not.

Edited to add that I crossposted with @Scottishskifun - very happy to see that it's still taught, at least in Scotland.

Edited

Yes definitely all of the above still taught in lessons it's also part of the assessment system both in Scotland and ESF in France.

I know we are fortunate where we are as skiing is seen as another activity because its council prices so same as swimming lessons etc and that's definitely not true elsewhere in the UK.

We have met a few bravado dad's on shared accommodation holidays who are surprised at DS1 ski level but I point out that he does it week in week out!

I have skied for 20 years and I still take lessons every few years because the style of ski changes and its always good to brush up on techniques etc.

TeenLifeMum · 24/02/2025 10:34

I imagine bike riding on roads is far riskier.

It’s terribly sad but if nobody took risks life would be rather dull.

Louisetheroux · 24/02/2025 10:35

Kissedbyfire1 · 24/02/2025 10:29

Second best Wink. We are a professional equestrian household and to us the “risks” of skiing are as nothing compared to what DH (former international) takes every day, at work.
On the point of skills, I didn’t learn to ski until adulthood, but have gone from total beginner to top intermediate/ early advanced (grade 8 or 9 depending which scale you use) in around 20-25 weeks skiing. I have had one to one lessons whenever I have wanted to add a new skill or focus on a particular aspect of technique but don’t have lessons every holiday. We aren’t wealthy and know how to make our holidays as cheap as possible.
We ski off-piste using guides where needed e.g. Vallee Blanche, Mont Fort backside and also ski-tour. We also hike in the Alps in summer.
Our children started skiing with their schools and for one of them, this experience of the high mountains and being in a family with a high tolerance of risk, has led to a career in outdoor education.

As others have said, the beauty of skiing is that if you don’t want to do it you don’t have to, and other people doing it doesn’t affect you in any way.

How have you been able to afford 25 weeks of skiing for yourself, school ski trips for your children (plural?), as well as separate summer holidays, if you're not wealthy?

People must have really different ideas on what constitutes wealthy

Funnywonder · 24/02/2025 10:36

Lovelysummerdays · 24/02/2025 08:24

I think obesity is largely self inflicted, obviously there are exceptions for genetic conditions and some medication causes weight gain but the vast majority of people are lardy because they eat too much and don’t burn it off.

There’s no point in trying to point someone like you in the direction of some facts about the physiological nature of obesity, considering that you think it’s ok to call human beings lardy.

Kissedbyfire1 · 24/02/2025 10:41

Louisetheroux · 24/02/2025 10:35

How have you been able to afford 25 weeks of skiing for yourself, school ski trips for your children (plural?), as well as separate summer holidays, if you're not wealthy?

People must have really different ideas on what constitutes wealthy

Because we usually don’t pay for our accommodation, being lucky to have generous friends.

Dramatic · 24/02/2025 10:42

Louisetheroux · 24/02/2025 10:35

How have you been able to afford 25 weeks of skiing for yourself, school ski trips for your children (plural?), as well as separate summer holidays, if you're not wealthy?

People must have really different ideas on what constitutes wealthy

Quite. Plenty of people I know struggle to afford a weekend at Haven, not a chance of an abroad holiday and definitely no chance of skiing.

Silvernutmeg70 · 24/02/2025 10:42

Notgivenuphope · 24/02/2025 10:28

Second letter E and last letter A?

Yep!

Kissedbyfire1 · 24/02/2025 10:43

And to be even more specific, @Louisetheroux not that it’s any of your business, our household income is around £70k pa, which by MN standards is practically poverty-stricken, and certainly isn’t “wealthy”.

Flustration · 24/02/2025 10:44

SerafinasGoose · 24/02/2025 10:23

Thank you so much for that really kind post. It's given me a much-needed lift today. There are periods when the back pain flares and is definitely worse than others - now is one of those times - and I've just last week had confirmation that my consultant will remove the metalwork that's still causing these issues. So now perhaps at least an improvement is in sight and so I'm feeling a bit emotional today. I intend to frame those rods and screws and hang them in pride of place in my study at home - goodness knows they're causing a lot of pain and restricted mobility now - but they are what saved my mobility in the first place and I will never not be grateful.

Of course, everyone's risks vs. benefits assessments will differ. I've also taken some really crazy and unacceptable risks when I was young and stupid, and been fine. The bad accident happened well into maturity.

The positive side is that I will always find alternative passions!

Ouch! Yes, frame those rods!!

It sounds like you were just really bloody unlucky.

Slightly off-topic but what you said about risks and benefits reminded me of something I read years ago about driving risks. They had apparently found that we all have an individual risk level that we are comfortable with and adapt our driving to suit, and that putting someone in a 'safer' car does not lower their personal risk as they subconsciously adjust for it.

But sometimes we take all the precautions, assess the risk well and shit happens anyway. I'm sorry it happened to you. Onwards and upwards!

DBD1975 · 24/02/2025 10:45

Life is all about the risks you are prepared to take and the risks you aren't. We can only try and minimise the risks as far as possible.
I have a work colleague who used to lambaste me for riding pillion on my husband's motorbike who happily took their children skiing every year (which I wouldn't do).

vitahelp · 24/02/2025 10:46

Nanny1983 · 23/02/2025 23:34

Maybe everyone who does extreme sports should be made to have proper insurance at all times so that our NHS isn’t picking up the costs if people want to go ahead and do these dangerous sports .
I know people go abroad and take out insurance but what about people who do the sports in the uk ?

Ok providing people who drink alcohol and vape/smoke go private as well, and maybe throw in people who eat badly/don’t exercise - only fair.

thedogatethecattreats · 24/02/2025 10:49

vitahelp · 24/02/2025 10:46

Ok providing people who drink alcohol and vape/smoke go private as well, and maybe throw in people who eat badly/don’t exercise - only fair.

I'd be curious to see the difference between the NHS bill for obesity and all obesity-related issues, and the bill for ski injuries.

Ski is hardly an "extreme sport". It can be, but it's just as likely about people pottering along the slopes.

Beehoon · 24/02/2025 10:51

Stupid bloody-
Teen street crime -> stabbings, car accidents rtc
Teen overdose from drugs
teens driving cars
teens drinking & doing stupid stuff & dying
teens taking own lives
teens dying during sports from undiagnosed heart defects
Teens drowning
etc

TagSplashMaverick · 24/02/2025 10:52

ExcessiveNumberOfNinjas · 23/02/2025 23:27

It's the way people wang on as if it's so bloody marvellous that gets me. It's dangerous and irresponsible and even if statistically you might not have a high chance of dying, I think you have a pretty high chance of getting hurt. I realise life is to be lived and it's not completely risk free. I just don't understand why so many people would actively choose to let their whole family do something that is so high risk. When it goes wrong it's not just a broken arm or ankle, it's brain damage.

Horse riding is dangrous. Bike riding is dangerous. Climbing frames can be dangerous. Swimming can be dangerous. Cricket can be dangerous. Rugby can be dangerous. Football can be dangerous, especially heading the ball. I think I’ve made my point.

With skiing, as with anything, you learn slowly. You don’t just chuck your kids down a black run.

I’ve seen someone break their neck playing rugby. I know someone with a brain injury from football. These things are deemed ‘normal’ sports.

Everything has risk. A ban on a sport because sometimes people get hurt, is mad.

Also, it’s skiing season, so those working in insurance or the medical translator who posted above, you’ll have a disproportionate cluster of cases. Because it’s seasonal.

vitahelp · 24/02/2025 10:52

thedogatethecattreats · 24/02/2025 10:49

I'd be curious to see the difference between the NHS bill for obesity and all obesity-related issues, and the bill for ski injuries.

Ski is hardly an "extreme sport". It can be, but it's just as likely about people pottering along the slopes.

Yes exactly, I’m tired of this argument about cyclists/skiers not being included in NHS provision, because they are taking a risk, while so many lead such an unhealthy lifestyle and think it’s fine for them to be treated!

ExcessiveNumberOfNinjas · 24/02/2025 10:55

Okay, lots of comments directed to me directly, it would take too long to quote and reply to each individually so I'll just address a few of them here:

Firstly, I am no inverted snob, there is no jealously or chippiness on my part and I can well afford to take any sort of holiday I choose and frequently do. I'm not going to outline this in explicit terms for you, you'll just have to take my word for it.

Secondly, yes I have been skiing, once. Didn't love it. DH quite likes it but not enough to insist we went as a family, and not enough to make a point of going without me.

Two of my children went with the school, (one skied, one snowboarded) they had fun but didn't get bitten by the bug. I loved the apres ski, the fresh air, the scenery, the food, the sitting in the sunshine in my padded gear and sunglasses with a hot chocolate or a gluwein in my hand. Didn't care for the skiing.

I completely agree with the poster who said it's 90% effort and faff and hanging around for 10% enjoyment. I didn't give it long enough to get good and perhaps when you are good it's much more rewarding, but even so, still 90% effort and faff. I think sailing looks the same if I'm honest. Anything where you spend more time and effort preparing to do the activity then packing up from the activity than the actual time spent doing it isn't worth it for me. Even the ski lifts seemed dangerous to me, as I recall. I am naturally quite risk averse and not an adrenaline junkie but I accept that others get their kicks and their most exhilerating life moments that way. I get mine from completely different things. Horses for courses.

Of course I let my children drive cars (well if they are old enough to drive a car they are old enough to make that decision irrespective of what I think anyway.) And of course I realise that there is risk every time we get in a car or a plane, or play football or anything else other than sitting at home doing nothing, which eventually carries its own very different sort of risk.

But there are lots of straw man arguments and false equivalences on this thread. The reason skiiing was not including in the top ten most dangerous activites in Britain is probably because only a small minority of Brits get to go skiing, compared to skate boarding or horse riding or playing rugby or whatever. If you looked at the figures for the Swiss or the Austrians it might show a very different picture.

When you took the number of people who downhill ski each year and the number of hours they spent doing it (very different in risk from cross country skiing I imagine) then broke it down into the number of injuries requiring medical treatment and fatalities and the number of hours per person spent doing it, I imagine the risk is significantly higher than for most other things that have been cited on this thread. Perhaps not worse than horseriding or rock climbing, or parkour, but still pretty risky. Just taking this thread alone, the number of people who have said they know someone personally who has died or been critically injured or left disabled from skiing is quite alarming. It would be interesting to know what the anecdotes would be like if I'd started a similar thread about horse riding or football or rugby.

People are saying that inexperienced skiiers are the risk to themselves or others. I am not sure that is always true. A very sensible skiier who doesn't push themselves too far too soon can still get wiped out or pushed off the slope into dangerous off piste territory in a moment of panic, by a very experienced but reckless adrenaline junkie who thinks he's invincible and loves the kudos of being the fastest one on the slope. This is akin to wreckless driving or aggressive tailgating in a very fast car. When an accident happens it's very often not the wreckless dick waver who pays the price. I have no idea how good a skier this poor lad was but it seems he hit a dip which then propelled him at very high speed and he lost control. Perhaps in a moment of panic people might just forget what they've been taught about how to slow down and come to a stop.

Several people have mentioned the 'Daily Mail' mentality and the 'Daily Mail narrative.' There is no DM mentality or narrative here. It's factual reporting of a true story, not a scaremongering opinion piece. It's been reported in other papers including the Telegraph. Someone even said it was a 'sensationalist DM headline' which I find pretty offensive. Someone's child has died by losing control on a ski slope. The facts haven't been ramped up for effect. Please tell me where the 'sensationalist' angle is there?

I realise life is for living and nothing is risk free, and I acknowledge the benefits of exercise, fresh air, blah blah. But I get this feeling in the pit of my stomach every ski season when there is inevitably a story like this about a British person dying or suffering catastrophic injuries. It's the same every time the London Marathon comes around and I brace myself because there is almost always at least one fun-runner every year who has pushed themselves too far because of the pressure to finish. They don't want to let their friends and family down, there's a sense of pride and ego attached and they've raised money for charity so they feel obliged to carry on until they collapse from a heart attack a couple of miles from the end, or shortly after finishing. And they often die.

They ignored all the warning signs thinking 'I'm running 26 miles, of course my chest hurts, I feel nauseous and I am breathless. I must just push on through or everyone will think I am a flaky loser.'

To the person who waxed lyrical about the freedom and the exihilaration, 'just me and the mountain' you are exactly the kind I was talking about when people 'wanging on about how amazing it is.' It's like a cult religion or something to you. But the thing is, it isn't just you and the mountain, is it? It's you and potentially a couple of hundred other people at any one time and any of you could lose control at any moment and be the reason someone else goes home on a stretcher, or worse, in a coffin.

Lastly, to those who have children going skiing with school shortly, please don't be too alarmed. If they are complete beginners they will be closely supervised and many will not make it off the nursery slopes. They'll be made to wear helmets and they almost certainly won't be skiing on the same runs as the big dick wavers, so the worst they are likely to suffer if an accident happens is a broken wrist or a bruised bum. Just tell them to be sensible, listen carefully to their instructors, don't be reckless but do enjoy themselves.

OP posts:
Notgivenuphope · 24/02/2025 10:56

Silvernutmeg70 · 24/02/2025 10:42

Yep!

Well there you go hahaha
nice to meet you colleague!