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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Another splitting costs with family

86 replies

Bananapants5 · 23/02/2025 16:33

Weekend trip with family

Parents (pensioners)
Sibling 1 - with husband and 2 children (young)
Sibling 2 - with husband - teen children not interested in coming.

Wanting to book 4 bed place due to ages of sibling 1s children
How should cost be split?

Split into 8 and then each family pay cost? (YABU)
Split among 6 adults? (YANBU)

To not drip feed the cost of 4 bed place is no more than a 3 bed place

OP posts:

Original poster

Bananapants5 · 24/02/2025 07:21

FKAT · 23/02/2025 21:25

Oh my Christ another post where I thank the lord I have the family I do and we don't spend our time whittling over what in the end will be a few quid.

If this is honestly an actual discussion then I'd be questioning whether I want to go away with people like this.

Oh my Christ another person making an assumption. Where has it been said that we’re “whittling” over anything?

OP posts:

Original poster

Bananapants5 · 24/02/2025 07:22

Sayithowiseeit · 23/02/2025 21:32

Have you factored in the spare bedroom that no one can sleep in and absolutely must be kept spare incase anyone gets ill or needs some time out 🤣🤣

🤣🤣🤣

OP posts:

ACynicalDad · 24/02/2025 07:27

GoneGirl12345 · 23/02/2025 18:59

If I were the parents of the 2 children, I would offer to split per room purely because out of principle of my family having an extra room. I guess the reality is there is an extra room in the house which no one else can use if it is being occupied by these two kids.

If I were the sibling with no kids on the trip and the cost was genuinely the same as the 3 bed, I'd say don't worry, we would just split it 3 ways.

This

Hercisback1 · 24/02/2025 07:27

If you're happy with thirds, roll with it. If you feel it's unfair, offer splitting into 7 as the alternate option.

If I was the one with the kids and it was thirds, I'd probably bring more food/wine or pay for a meal out.

BeaLola · 24/02/2025 07:28

mitogoshigg · 23/02/2025 21:51

My brothers never let me pay more (I'm the only one with dc) but id treat everyone at some point, depending on budget it might be an evening meal, lunch or a day trip

This

rookiemere · 24/02/2025 07:34

The 3 bedroom place at the same price can't have been identical, there must have been some aspect that was better, otherwise no one would ever book it.

I'm on the fence. If you go for straight 1/3 split you will forever more be paying for the extra room but making the DPs pay twice as much as the others doesn't seem right either, particularly as this could be happening for a few more years. I would maybe suggest a 40/30/30 split of the rental costs.

RatedDoingMagic · 24/02/2025 07:45

My friend&family group would split like this:
50% of cost is split per-head with young children counting as 0.5heads and older teens (irrelevant to you) as 0.75heads.
50% is split per room.

Under these rules sibling1 who is providing 40% of the headcount and using half the rooms pays about 44% and the two couples not bringing kids pay about 28% each. This seems fair to me. Young children will dominate the house and set the tone for the whole holiday, it is appropriate for that family to pay more. However if there is quibbling about this it would be better not to holiday together. if it gets split per family ⅓rd each way it's not that different and if you love each other enough to holiday with each other then gifting the difference as a kindness is not too much of a hardship. If the budget is such that the percentage split will make a significant financial difference to anyone you should all be choosing a cheaper holiday.

WaltzingWaters · 24/02/2025 07:51

In this case with the extra bedroom not costing any extra, I’d say split between the adults. If on a future holiday an extra bedroom does cost more, then it’s fair for their parents to pay extra to accommodate that.

Goldbar · 24/02/2025 08:25

Either split per room or split on the basis that the two children count as one adult.

So:
Parents pay 2/7.
Sibling 1 and family pay 3/7.
Sibling 2 pays 2/7.

There's likely to be a reason that the 4 bed is the same price as a 3 bed and, in any event, parents and Sibling 2 are going to be sharing their holiday with young children which make it less of a "holiday" imo. Sibling 1 will hopefully benefit from having their kids "diluted" by the extra adults around 😂.

rookiemere · 24/02/2025 08:37

Actually the best result all round would be if the DPs bringing their DC offered to pay a bigger share. Then I would more than likely say that it cost the same as the 3 bedroom place so happy for everyone to pay the same.

ServantsGonnaServe · 24/02/2025 09:08

JoyousEagle · 23/02/2025 17:19

To not drip feed the cost of 4 bed place is no more than a 3 bed place

Split three ways in this case.

This. If the kids weren't going, you'd be booking a 3 bed so the kids room is basically free. Noone is paying more because of the kids

What is the actual cost difference anyway if doing it per adult or person?

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