To think it’s normal to live paycheck to paycheck?

[Colacubegirl]

I work part time and have young DC. I just really struggle to save, as soon as I put £100 away I end up needing to spend it the next month.

I have so much pressure on myself to save some money for the future, I really want to, but really struggling with cost of living and this year is so busy. 4 weddings! Lots of milestone birthdays etc. Christmas has just been and gone.

Do you live month to month?

If you’re a part-time worker with young kids (and a single parent?) then yes I’d say it’s completely normal.

You’re on benefits, right?

Those benefits are supposed to be to cover yours and your children’s essential costs. Not building up savings and people’s wedding gifts and the like. If you’re covering your family’s costs, you’re doing just fine for now. Don’t beat yourself up over it.

When your children are older you can increase your hours, build your career and start saving.

Weddings, birthdays and Christmas aren't as important as adequate cash savings and pensions. They aren't "needs."

That's how people end up constantly on the edge.

I think a lot of people do yes but as others have said it really depends on your priorities a lot of the time. But for some it’s not the case I suppose

Yes

I suggest that there are some harsh comments on here

We all need to make sure we have a sufficient 'cushion' for one off expenses eg to be able to replace washing machine/cooker/car and there are expenses that come up annually eg car tax & insurance MoT etc so yes benefits need to include an element for 'saving'

Have you looked at the Help To Save account?

https://www.gov.uk/get-help-savings-low-income/how-to-apply

It's not as flexible as you might like or the Ecology Building Society Regular Savings Account

www.ecology.co.uk/savings/savings-accounts/regular-savings/?_gl=1m6oevr_upMQ.._gs*MQ..&gclid=Cj0KCQiAwtu9BhC8ARIsAI9JHamFuamucZCYFIsibQ1-So1W4FiWiFrzC6_n3jcQNGwUZHg4-i3EvuIaAlMlEALw_wcB

There's no normal on MN, when it comes to income, because the incomes vary so much. If you've not got much coming in relation to living costs then, yes, it's reasonable to be counting the pennies towards next pay day though.

I was, for a long time. I thought I was budgeting as well as I could, but never seemed to be getting anywhere and there were always surprises.

I started using YNAB about a year ago, and for me it has helped massively.
Lots of people can do the same theory without the online tool, but it worked for me and I've managed to build up a cushion that I never could before.

But I hear you @Colacubegirl after all my bills and budgeting (and saving) I should have 243 left to literally play with and/or save. I was delighted this morning because I have 228 in my bank account and I get paid on Monday. I thought great I can do a few nice things with the dc this weekend, turned on the heating an hour ago and the oil is gone…so I’ll need 300 for that 😩🙄

Where did you get from my OP that I’m on benefits?

Aren’t you?

It’d be unusual for a part-time worker with young children, worrying over £100, not to be. Have a look on entitled.to and make sure you’re claiming all you’re entitled to anyway.

No but maybe my OP made me sound like a single parent. I have a DH who has savings but we have seperate money and I just want to build a fund for myself. He pays for any big purchases if needed.

Agree with others though I do need to say no to birthdays and keep saving into my pot

Yes I think it's normal for most people. Maybe not those on MN as the demographic is more well off than the country more generally speaking.

The advice is to have a few months living costs in savings and most people could save more than they do if they really tried, but for anyone on a low income any savings are likely to be swallowed by unexpected events and COL increases unfortunately. Even where savings can be made, for many the control required to achieve h at means that day-to-day life is utterly miserable. When my DC were little, for example, I budgeted everything but to make ends meet I would have to refuse even a £1 coffee at the local cafe with friends.

I would say this set up is unusual. I would also say it’s not unusual to live pay check to paycheck if you work part time with small DC and you’re a single parent, but it is unusual if you have a DH who is working.

Why aren't those savings joint savings? You are married with a child!

Alternatively, if you want to continue with separate finances, if your DH can afford to save, and you aren't a frivolous spender, then you should also be able to afford to save. Does he adequately cover all family (including the kids) expenses proportional to his income?

I wonder what world you are living in that you think this unusual. Your comment is obviously intended to be passive aggressively and if it's not intentional then you need to look at how you communicate with people, because that's not it.

Op also didn't say she was worried ov the money. But that if she put it away she ended up needing it the next month.

To answer your question op I think it's very normal. I'm not in that situation now but was for a while when building my career, studying and having health issues. I work with a lot of community orgs and groups, many people can't afford basics on their incomes. Many people in this country live like this, especially as the cost of living is so high. I don't think it's right that this is the case, but it's common yes.

That sounds like it could be financial abuse? Why don’t you have access to the family money?

It changes the situation entirely though, what do you need the savings for if he will cover any big expenses? Is he paying fairly for the children and household costs, considering you’re (I’m assuming) doing part-time work to balance it with childcare? What does your money go on?

It's "normal" OP, although 99% of people on here live in a seven bedroom detached period "property", with a sauna, jacuzzi and room for a pony. And those people will say

"oh, that must be gastly"

"My DH knew a man who lived like that, awful business".

Reality is that the economy is designed to have people living month to month. If we all had loads of money then nobody would do minimum wage jobs. No shop workers, waiting staff, production workers, nobody to make the things those of us with loads of money would want to buy. How could you get that new car if there were no workers to make it.

Don't feel too bad OP, you're with 90% of us.

To not qualify for any form of child-related benefit OP would be on 80k for part-time hours. That’s very unusual.

She’s now mentioned a husband who is working, which changes the scenario entirely.

I've lived for most of my working life paycheck to paycheck until about 5 years ago. Wasn't being extravagant. Worked FT and more, single parent paying everything on their own . So it's normal for alot of people

You can’t rationalize away financial abuse by trying to make your situation look normal.

your husband shouldn’t be able to save while you are struggling. That men’s something is very wrong with your financial setup.

You need to combine your money, as it doesn't seem fair he earns more and saves more when you can't. We share ours and when it's over a certain amount, we transfer half each into our ISAs.

. I have a DH who has savings but we have seperate money

Sigh, of course he does.

Anyway, there is no normal really. Some people can't afford bills & adequate living costs, some have pennies left at the end of the month, and some are able to save £££s every payday. Me and DH manage to save around £1k between us each month, we are both mindful spenders though. This wasn't always the case, had to forego weddings etc when younger as we couldn't afford a gift, travel, outfits etc. It depends what your priorities are a bit.

It's obvious, just don't spend money on weddings and birthdays. A better solution than complaining on Mumsnet.

Can you afford to work part time only?

I think it's normal in these circumstances. It's also about spending habits. Christmas doesn't have to be expensive and I have turned weddings etc down due to cost. If it's a stretch, don't do it.

That’s a drip feed.

ok, it’s normal for many people to live hand to mouth yes. It is not normal when married when one does that and the other doesn’t. However birthdays, weddings, xmas’s, are simply things you chose to spend all your money on over saving.