Just been sacked for the first time ever after a funeral

[PrueD]

On Monday I was at a funeral and yesterday I was off on compassionate leave. When I returned today the director sacked me. Been there 9 months.

Before now, I hadn’t been made aware of any issues in my one to ones, the last one being a week and a half ago. I had told my manager a month ago about my terminally ill relative. It was harder to work at my usual capacity at this time but I was still doing a good job on important projects. The main problem I had was they kept piling on more work on top of existing work.

I said I would’ve liked the chance to address any issues and they said they don’t have capacity to support and that’s it. I’m in shock, having an awful week as it is.

Haven't read the whole thread but just wanted to say how sorry I am to hear what's happened.
I worked somewhere very toxic and hadn't been there long when my very recent ex-partner died and they were absolutely awful about it.

I'm a manager myself now and think it's shocking how you've been treated.

I know you won't be able to see this now but if this is how they treat their staff, you're better off out.

When my ex-partner died it was a really awful time obviously, but when I really hit rock bottom it was after an awful meeting with my boss. Someone from occupational health was there supporting me and she said afterwards she couldn't believe how he'd spoken to me. I went home and called Samaritans feeling the closest to the edge that I've ever felt. I'd always got on really well at work so it felt like my sense of who I was was shattered.

Luckily I had another job at the time that I did 2 days a week and they supported me really well and seemed to be really happy with my work.

When I got out of my awful job and moved to a new city it was like a weight had been lifted and I could start grieving properly.

Sending all the most positive wishes and hopes for the best to you. It will probably be a shit time for a bit but you'll get through it!!

You tell the truth.

If they ask why you're applying for the job, you tell them you're seeking a new opportunity.

If they ask why you're leaving your current job, you tell them you actually love your current job, work really hard, had a great appraisal/review a few weeks ago, but had to take two days off due to your grandmother passing away, and her funeral so they terminated your contract. Make it clear your manager went on maternity two weeks ago so it's the new manager who decided to terminate your contract.

Sounds like you're better off finding something else. Try and see it as a positive, even though it sucks right now.

& I’d tell close to the truth on CV / at interview, you delivered X, Y & Z in your time there, if asked why you left say that a project ended & your employer gave you notice.

You've not been dismissed for any kind of misconduct so in all probability they'll want you to be a 'good leaver', especially if you're in a cottage industry.

I would suggest a friendly convo with your manager in which you can let it be known that you'd like a really good reference. I doubt they'll have an issue with that; I certainly make an effort to write good references for people I think are good but just not right for my business, or even make introductions where I can. One of my leavers ended up in a company whose size and client roster is much more suited to him. I see him regularly and he's thriving.

I honestly think this will end up being a blessing in disguise for you as long as you play your cards right in this transitionary period and don't burn any bridges.

I'm so sorry for loss, and for their crass, insensitive timing.

At the moment you're in turmoil, grieving, worried about income, concerned about your reputation and prospects.

This is all absolutely understandable - be gentle with yourself.

Some therapy for the grieving process.

Investigate if you might qualify for some benefits to tide you over financially.

Push for any severance pay you might be entitled to. (Talk to acas, your union, if necessary)

And work on a change of mindset when you feel stronger.

I was fired nine months after I started a 'permanent' full time role nine years ago. I was aware they were casting about trying to find things for me to do. Eventually I was called in, handed a letter, told don't come in tomorrow and we'll give you a couple of months pay in lieu of notice.

It's possible they can't afford you, felt the job you were doing was complete, don't have much work to justify keeping you on, are making 'efficiences' (🤮) in other areas, are in trouble ... If there is no concrete feedback you can actually use - put it down to life experience. It will recede into the past very quickly. Your goal is to push it down and overlay it with better, current experience.

The important thing is the way you think, speak and write about that experience.

What did you learn? Achieve? Deliver? Any transformations, savings, testimonials you can quote?

Polish up your CV asap, and your LinkedIn profile with that up to date info. Positive, proud of what you did with that time and experience.

Ask good colleagues for LinkedIn recommendations - they're valuable.

And do what I did - refer to that engagement as an FTC - fixed term contract. The more you write and say it, the more you will believe it yourself.

A reference is just to confirm you did work there for that period. Secure that confirmation, those contact details, from HR asap. It's not about how well they think you did it.

Stay polite, pleasant and businesslike however you may be feeling in all your dealings with them - and how you talk about them. You never know.

All the best.

Get in first with anyone in your industry whose opinion you value. You can truthfully say you "left" without going into details of how. Give the impression they were not a good company to work for, and that you are looking for somewhere else with more integrity and professionalism.
I am sorry for your loss OP. more important in the greater scheme than this employment blip in your life.💐

If a grandparent that is immediate family so yes this is unreasonable.
Legally though you can be dismissed quite easily within 2 years.
Were there any other concerns or issues at work - had it all been going well until that point? Had you handled the request for time off for the funeral well? Had you had other time off related to any other issues? I know it's so disappointing when employers don't support you in the way they should.

I know it's no comfort right now but it's a shitty situation and they have behaved unprofessionally.
Most of us have had an experience of "not being the right fit" and it stings but isn't unusual
I think it sounds like a horrible working environment and here is a good chance to find something much better.
I work in recruitment and there is a definite pick up I think after a very slow year last year. Fingers crossed the right job comes alng soon.

Yes you are wrong. At less than two years employment an employee can be dismissed for any reason or no reason with very limited exclusions. Bereavement isn't one of them.

Given the fact you lost your gran, are grieving and your head is likely not in a very good place, I would seek advice to see if it is unfair dismissal, and I'd also think about going to the media/local newspaper. Grief can be consuming and I find it really unacceptable that you have been treated like that having lost one of the most important people in your life.

@PrueD did you have a probation period and pass it? I’m sorry this happened. Any chance former employer will take you back on? Anyone from there who knows you will know you are a good worker as they wanted to keep you, despite what the new company might say. Could you ask your former Manager from the new company to be your referee?

* Given the fact you lost your gran, are grieving and your head is likely not in a very good place, I would seek advice to see if it is unfair dismissal, and I'd also think about going to the media/local newspaper. Grief can be consuming and I find it really unacceptable that you have been treated like that having lost one of the most important people in your life.

It is legal though , unfair dismissal does not apply.

I had had no other time off. The paid time off for the funeral and the day after was approved straight away.

One issue was raised shortly after my gran died - that I hadn’t kept my timesheets as up to date as they should be in recent weeks. I had a genuine heart to heart with the new manager then explaining the situation had she was kind about it, but from that moment she micromanaged - something previous manager never did.

Straight after the bereavement I was given a huge pile of extra work on top of what I already had. I was doing a decent job of managing it but I wasn’t at the 100% performance level I was at 2 months ago for example.

Aside from this, I had only received positive feedback on my performance.

Yes I had a 3 month probation and passed with flying colours. The manager was delighted with me.

I have several friends from previous company. A senior manager joked ‘you’ll not like them and be back here in no time’, ahem. But do I really want to backwards?

Your old employer would probably be a good option to try if you want / need work quickly.

Sorry for your loss. I hope you get a better job soon and can look back and think you are well rid of them.

Contact your old employer! Your network is always your first port of call.

You could say it was a temporary post and the management changed and you weren’t needed any more. In fact, would it be worth asking the person who just sacked you if they could call it redundancy, so it looks better on your CV? You’ve not been there long enough to get a payout so it would be no hardship for them to say that.

I'm really sorry you've lost your DGM OP and that your "charming" employer has decided to dismiss you at what is already an awful time for you - it must feel like an utter gut-punch, but says so much more about them than you. I appreciate you feel devastated now, but I want you to know this experience will not affect your ability to get another job (when something similar happened to me I went on to get a more interesting, better-paid job with a much more professional and secure employer and the previous "blip" didn't affect my future at all - indeed, many people have these employment "war stories" to tell).
Also, don't get too hung up on getting a "good" reference from this employer. When the General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR) and the Data Protection Act were introduced in 2018 most employers started using standard template references which simply confirm a former employee's role (e.g. Project Manager) and the dates to/from they were employed and making no comment about their performance at all. This is because the GDPR introduced stricter rules around data collection, storage, and disclosure, making employers more cautious about providing detailed employment references. In reality this was a bit of an over-reaction to the GDPR requirements, however, it also relieved employers of the administrative burden of writing personalised references so they saw it as a win-win. I suggest you ask your employer if they would send a reference to you for you to show to prospective employers (it's unlikely to state anything derogatory about your performance that you might query). I previously worked for one of the oil majors and when I left they emailed me their standard template reference for me (as a .pdf on company headed paper) which I could email to any prospective employer who asked for it.
As PPs have stated, you have minimal employment rights due to having less than two years continuous service, however, all employees have the basic rights, from day one, to not suffer discrimination against the nine protected characteristics defined in the Equality Act 2010 (unfortunately, bereavement isn't one of them) and to not be dismissed for a reason that's "automatically unfair". Having checked the reasons that are automatically unfair, I can't see how this right applies to you, but if you have time (and the inclination) to explore this further whilst job-hunting, you could contact your local Citizen Advice office for an adviser to do a full exploration with you which may, or may not, reveal something useful in this regard which you haven't posted here.
Finally, you mention having a partner, but don't say what their earnings are. It would be worth using one of the good online benefits calculators (this is a good one: https://benefits-calculator.turn2us.org.uk/ ) to check if you are eligible for Universal Credit. It's really easy to use - just accurately answer the questions and it will give you guidance on your eligibility for benefits whilst you're looking for work.
Wishing you all the very best at this very difficult time OP. 🤗

It’s a thought but why would they take back someone who left them?

in truth my old colleagues are much nicer on the whole and I have missed them. Would feel like a step back though. I think if they said sling your hook it would be too much shame to deal with!

So sorry for your loss. What a time for this to happen.
Re references - you successfully completed a big project recently... Is the kind of thing you could ask the client for a reference for your work on that project? If you got on well with them? Or your manager who is on maternity leave (you may have to promise you won't disclose this to your last employer ). As a personal reference?

As many have said. It wasn't personal. They were not replacing people they'd let go and your project was over. Its shitty and It may seem tough now, but the company you worked for sounds unpleasant. You know that you are good at your profession, I'm sure you will find a better placement.. best of luck

Absolutely not. Any decent HR dept will expect periods of unemployment to be explained honestly. I once queried a 12 month gap in a prospective employee's career history and it transpired they'd been in prison.

As you've only been there a short while, you could leave it off your CV. You could say you took time off to care for a sick relative (your gran).

Also, sorry that this happened but they do sound a horribly toxic place to work. 8n the long run, you are definitely better off out of there. Good luck! Xx

It could be though. The reality is that I can't see that the OP was poor at their job, although obviously we only have the OP's word for that. They have put the reason for dismissal (true or not) in writing. Employers are legally obliged to tell the truth in a reference, and can be sued if they do not. They can choose to say nothing, and some employers do choose to say nothing. Or they can tell the truth. The "truth" in this instance is that the OP was dismissed for poor performance. To now say otherwise would be a deliberate lie. And could come back to haunt the employer. It probably wouldn't, but it's a case of "famous last words" for anyone to assert that it couldn't happen. Just like saying that an employee leaving without working thier notice won't get sued - most of the time they don't, but it does happen.

I like @Ariela 's suggestion OP:

Ariela · Today 11:04
I would be honest at interview, and say your reviews in person with your manager had been good and no issues were raised, but suspect may be a case of last in first out, as you'd just successfully delivered a large project you had been working on, and you'd taken some leave due to a very close family death so you imagine it was a convenient time to ask you to leave with the costs of employees due to go up in April, meaning they could now remove your position and cut costs.
Then I would say how much you're looking forward to moving on and tackling new challenges etc, or some such positive forward looking comment.