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Original poster

To think it’s not possible to get married in your back garden in England??

76 replies

Bootlebride · 19/02/2025 09:11

Everything I have read about the law on weddings in England and Wales suggests it’s not possible to get married in your back garden (unless you own a stately home or a castle or something). (The law is slightly different in Scotland).

However, I was reading a thread on Facebook yesterday where a handful of people were saying they had got married in their back garden, by a registrar (so, not just a symbolic ceremony with a celebrant and then doing the legal bit at the registry office later, but actually getting officially married by the registrar in their own back garden).

But I just cannot see how it’s possible… is there something I’m missing here? Or are some local authorities just a bit more lax than others in what they’ll allow? Can someone explain it to me?

From the citizens advice website:

”Where can a marriage take place
A marriage can take place in:-

  • a Register Office
  • premises approved by the local authority such as a hotel
  • a church of the Church of England, Church in Wales
  • a synagogue or any other private place if both partners are Jewish
  • a Meeting House if one or both partners are either members of the Society of Friends (Quakers) or are associated with the Society by attending meetings
  • any registered religious building (England and Wales only)
  • the home of one of the partners if the partner is housebound or detained, for example, in prison
  • a place where one partner is seriously ill and not expected to recover, for example, in hospital
  • a licensed naval, military or air force chapel

Local authorities in England and Wales may approve premises other than Register Offices where civil marriages may take place. Applications for approval must be made by the owner or trustee of the building, not the couple.
The premises must be regularly open to members of the public, so private homes are unlikely to be approved, since they are not normally open to the public. Stately homes, hotels and civic buildings are likely to be thought suitable. Approval will not be given for open air venues, such as moonlit beaches or golf courses. Generally, the premises will need to be permanent built structures, although it may be possible for approval to be given to a permanently moored, publicly open boat. Hot air balloons or aeroplanes will not be approved.”

Other websites, including .gov websites, seem to back that up.

OP posts:
user2848502016 · 19/02/2025 13:06

No it's not legal.
My brother and SIL had their ceremony in a building that wasn't licensed so that was their "wedding" then they went down the registry office a few days later to make it official

28Fluctuations · 19/02/2025 13:09

What does it matter? Have the marriage contract done at the town hall - it's a legal contract and not terribly romantic. Then have a wedding in your garden, with a celebrant of your choice, friends, family, flowers, food, music. The fun and memorable bit, where you take the important step of committing to each other in front of people you care about.

MimiSunshine · 19/02/2025 13:11

Blarn · 19/02/2025 09:22

I love how that guidance specifically rules out 'moonlit beaches'. Do you think this is something they had a lot of annoyed correspondence about so felt the need to include it in the published guidelines!

😆 yep

reminds me of a dress code at place I once worked, very specifically said ‘see through clothing was unacceptable’. And was included because someone once came in a top that didn’t have a prominent logo or text on it (tops with slogans on weren’t allowed) and didn’t seem to think there was an issue with it being translucent no as long as it met that criteria.

it wasn’t just thin material, it was basically a beach top you’d throw of over a bikini only they had a regular bra on.

CandidHedgehog · 19/02/2025 18:07

Didn’t Charles and Camilla get caught out by this? They were going to marry somewhere but they didn’t want to open whatever the location was to the public so getting it licensed fell through at the last minute and they had to move to a registry office. Or am I misremembering the whole thing?

Best case scenario with the OP’s friends there was some sort of secret registry office wedding they don’t want to admit to. Worst case, someone is being scammed into thinking they are legally married when they actually aren’t.

SnoozingFox · 19/02/2025 18:09

You are absolutely right, people in Scotland can be married in any location. In England it has to be at "approved premises".

So yeah, it's one of these weddings which is all pretend and fake, because the couple have been legally married in a register office or something beforehand. Absolutely fine if they are open and transparent about what they are doing but really devious if they are trying to kid on that people are seeing a real marriage.

Echobelly · 19/02/2025 18:13

At the moment, only Jewish weddings have a dispensation to be official outside a licensed space (the license comes with the rabbi). DH and I used this to have our ceremony outdoors by the venue and I've been to at least one Jewish wedding in a private garden. No idea why we get this exception, it hardly seems fair!

SnoozingFox · 19/02/2025 18:14

Wasn't Jerry Hall and Mick Jagger, was it? Their beach ceremony in Bali was like this, and entirely not-legal which was a bit of a nightmare for Ms Hall when they split.

Tomatotater · 19/02/2025 18:15

Someone lied? On Social Media? Say it ain't so!

Mymanyellow · 19/02/2025 18:16

CandidHedgehog · 19/02/2025 18:07

Didn’t Charles and Camilla get caught out by this? They were going to marry somewhere but they didn’t want to open whatever the location was to the public so getting it licensed fell through at the last minute and they had to move to a registry office. Or am I misremembering the whole thing?

Best case scenario with the OP’s friends there was some sort of secret registry office wedding they don’t want to admit to. Worst case, someone is being scammed into thinking they are legally married when they actually aren’t.

Windsor castle I think. They wanted to marry there but had to go to the registry office first.

doodleygirl · 19/02/2025 18:17

My friend got married in her garden, bride and groom are Jewish and the rabbi can legally marry you in your garden.

RoundSquareWithTriangles · 20/02/2025 11:38

TeaRoseTallulah · 19/02/2025 12:36

We got married in my parent's garden, we had the official paperwork done a month before and then a friend who is a vicar blessed us in the garden.

But then LEGALLY you didn't get married in your parents' garden. You were legally married a month before!

Winter2028 · 20/02/2025 11:43

Bootlebride · 19/02/2025 09:11

Everything I have read about the law on weddings in England and Wales suggests it’s not possible to get married in your back garden (unless you own a stately home or a castle or something). (The law is slightly different in Scotland).

However, I was reading a thread on Facebook yesterday where a handful of people were saying they had got married in their back garden, by a registrar (so, not just a symbolic ceremony with a celebrant and then doing the legal bit at the registry office later, but actually getting officially married by the registrar in their own back garden).

But I just cannot see how it’s possible… is there something I’m missing here? Or are some local authorities just a bit more lax than others in what they’ll allow? Can someone explain it to me?

From the citizens advice website:

”Where can a marriage take place
A marriage can take place in:-

  • a Register Office
  • premises approved by the local authority such as a hotel
  • a church of the Church of England, Church in Wales
  • a synagogue or any other private place if both partners are Jewish
  • a Meeting House if one or both partners are either members of the Society of Friends (Quakers) or are associated with the Society by attending meetings
  • any registered religious building (England and Wales only)
  • the home of one of the partners if the partner is housebound or detained, for example, in prison
  • a place where one partner is seriously ill and not expected to recover, for example, in hospital
  • a licensed naval, military or air force chapel

Local authorities in England and Wales may approve premises other than Register Offices where civil marriages may take place. Applications for approval must be made by the owner or trustee of the building, not the couple.
The premises must be regularly open to members of the public, so private homes are unlikely to be approved, since they are not normally open to the public. Stately homes, hotels and civic buildings are likely to be thought suitable. Approval will not be given for open air venues, such as moonlit beaches or golf courses. Generally, the premises will need to be permanent built structures, although it may be possible for approval to be given to a permanently moored, publicly open boat. Hot air balloons or aeroplanes will not be approved.”

Other websites, including .gov websites, seem to back that up.

My mother in law got married in a back garden. It was conducted under the auspices of her synagogue. As long as that is the case, a Jewish wedding can take place anywhere and be legally binding. Both bride and groom also need to be members of the synagogue.

Winter2028 · 20/02/2025 11:48

Echobelly · 19/02/2025 18:13

At the moment, only Jewish weddings have a dispensation to be official outside a licensed space (the license comes with the rabbi). DH and I used this to have our ceremony outdoors by the venue and I've been to at least one Jewish wedding in a private garden. No idea why we get this exception, it hardly seems fair!

To be fair we have to pay membership fees and the idea about jewish ceremonies is you just need 4 sticks, a tallit for a chuppah and a minyan and 4 guys to hold it up.

Elsvieta · 20/02/2025 19:48

Surprised by that bit on the list about "any other private place if both partners are Jewish". How can it be legal to have different laws for different people based on their religion or ethnicity?

CandidHedgehog · 20/02/2025 19:58

Elsvieta · 20/02/2025 19:48

Surprised by that bit on the list about "any other private place if both partners are Jewish". How can it be legal to have different laws for different people based on their religion or ethnicity?

Well after literally centuries in England of only marriages in Church of England churches being legal no matter the actual religion of the participants, followed by (from 1836) the adding in of registry offices, you might say the marriage laws of England and Wales have never not had ‘different laws for different people’ (Christians could have services in their own religion, no one else could).

Chersfrozenface · 20/02/2025 20:09

Papergirl1968 · 19/02/2025 12:28

I don’t know if the home of one of the partners might include the garden? I know of one recent wedding at home where the bride was terminally ill and I guess not well enough to travel to a registry office.
Didn’t Harry and Meghan claim they’d actually got married three days before the wedding, which turned out to be a load of rubbish?

I know of one recent wedding at home where the bride was terminally ill and I guess not well enough to travel to a registry office.

There are exceptions for a "housebound or detained person" but with conditions.

LlynTegid · 20/02/2025 20:19

Is Gyles Brandreth or one of his family on MN? Gyles Brandreth when an MP did what I think is the best thing any Tory MP has done in many years by introducing the law that widened the choice of wedding venues. Perhaps he could help here.

mathanxiety · 20/02/2025 20:19

Echobelly · 19/02/2025 18:13

At the moment, only Jewish weddings have a dispensation to be official outside a licensed space (the license comes with the rabbi). DH and I used this to have our ceremony outdoors by the venue and I've been to at least one Jewish wedding in a private garden. No idea why we get this exception, it hardly seems fair!

I wonder if it's because of the chuppah/ canopy functioning as a sort of religiously blessed semi-indoors space (a kind of remote extension of a synagogue) even if outdoors?

mathanxiety · 20/02/2025 20:20

Elsvieta · 20/02/2025 19:48

Surprised by that bit on the list about "any other private place if both partners are Jewish". How can it be legal to have different laws for different people based on their religion or ethnicity?

I'm guessing it's because of the chuppah..

Whoarethoseguys · 20/02/2025 20:21

If they did the legal bit at the register office later than they didn't actually get married in the back garden they got married at the register office.

Mama_bear · 20/02/2025 20:31

My sister was married in her living room, ahe had terminal cancer. Could the situation mentioned be similar?

Lettuceandbroccolisoup · 20/02/2025 20:33

Bootlebride · 19/02/2025 09:18

That’s what I thought, but there were at least three people saying they actually did the legal bit in their garden??! Are they just lying?? Or did the registrar break the law? Or perhaps they are mistaken and it wasn’t a real registrar and they aren’t really married?? 😂

Show quote history

Isn't this what Meghan Markle said? That she and Harry were married by the ABC in the garden ?? 😮

Completelyjo · 20/02/2025 20:35

England and Wales still have the old marriage laws whereas Scotlands and NI’s are more recent so in the latter two you can have a humanist celebrant and do it wherever you want, in England and Wales it needs to be in an approved place under some sort of structure.

Chersfrozenface · 20/02/2025 20:37

Mama_bear · 20/02/2025 20:31

My sister was married in her living room, ahe had terminal cancer. Could the situation mentioned be similar?

I'm very sorry to hear about your sister.

There are special exceptions in cases like this, with conditions. Ealing Council has a very clear explanation.
https://www.ealing.gov.uk/info/201037/marriages_and_civil_partnerships/750/exceptional_circumstances

Starseeking · 20/02/2025 20:43

CandidHedgehog · 19/02/2025 18:07

Didn’t Charles and Camilla get caught out by this? They were going to marry somewhere but they didn’t want to open whatever the location was to the public so getting it licensed fell through at the last minute and they had to move to a registry office. Or am I misremembering the whole thing?

Best case scenario with the OP’s friends there was some sort of secret registry office wedding they don’t want to admit to. Worst case, someone is being scammed into thinking they are legally married when they actually aren’t.

Charles and Camilla originally wanted to get married at Windsor Castle and have a private service but on realising they'd have to open it up to us plebs, they changed their minds and went to the register office. They both looked so happy coming out of the venue.

I can't believe they got married 20 years ago, the time has flown by so quickly!

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