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How to advise my friend on move

3 replies

Ditto44 · 18/02/2025 11:39

My friend has asked for my advise on a possible house move and I'm really torn.

Her and DH moved to Spain a number of years ago. Both have great jobs, she wfh most of the week.
They have brought a lovely house, 3 beds with pool. It is however a bit far out from the small town where her 2 children go to school.

Children are 11 and 10 and last year she had another baby.

Where they live is very quiet, more like a holiday place and mostly expats. As the oldest is now in secondary school he gets frustrated as most of his friends "play out" after school.

It really is a lovely little town with huge communal pool, football pitches and very safe. It's a bit like how childhood was years ago with children out playing and lots of community stuff going on.

So to her dilemma, she wanted to move back to the town (they lived there when they first moved). But they can't afford to buy a house.

A very large 4 bed flat has come on the market. Close to the secondary school and would mean that they would have no mortgage if they moved there.
So all children would have their own room and close to their friends.

She is torn on what to do, going from a house with pool back to a flat, she says the novelty of the pool does wear off but I'm not sure if she will regret it?

Will save £500 per month if they make the move. I can see the positives and negatives in both and just wondered on others opinions please?

OP posts:
Catza · 18/02/2025 11:58

It's pretty standard to be living in a flat in Europe. My grandparents have a three bed and raised three generations there. The flats are usually surrounded by green spaces and there will quite possibly be a community pool in the complex or nearby. I have a flat in Spain myself and it's wonderful, spacious with an ocean view from a terrace - very different from poky flats in the UK. I would have no concerns about living in one with children based on my own experience of being brought up in one.

AnxiouslyAwaitingSpring · 18/02/2025 23:41

Unless all houses out there are one storey (never been to Spain) I'd def take the flat. One thing I've noticed since having had a toddler in a small 3 storey home and my parents having a big bungalow, is the huge difference in my child when she got to run from room to room in the bungalow when she was small! When I was at my parents' I could be doing something in a bedroom and toddler dc could come with me without having to follow me up 1/2 flights of stairs! Watching my little one run around their house and seeing how much happier it made her, made me want a bungalow or a flat!

Ditto44 · 19/02/2025 10:46

Thank you @AnxiouslyAwaitingSpring

They actually have 3 floors at the moment, their bedroom is at the top with DC on the next and then a basement.
Another reason for thinking of moving as she doesn't want the baby on a different floor.

I spoke to her last night and she is seriously considering the flat, although she does feel like it's a bit of a backward step.
I can see the pros and cons in both so could t really advise either way.

However, to be mortgage free before you are 40 would be great!

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